My boyfriend breaks up with me and says “I just don’t love you anymore”? What do I do?

Question

I have trouble believing this, because at the time I thought things were perfect. Actually I thought that things had never been better. Then he blew me out of the water with this statement. I don’t believe you can fall out of love with someone in three days. And his behavior backs up my theory. He acts angry towards me…as though I have done something wrong, and he wants nothing to do with me. This makes me think that he does still love me and that there is something else wrong, and so he feels like the only emotion he can express is anger. Does he still love me? Why is he treating me like this?

Answer 1

I agree that it's hard to believe, but I think you're boyfriend wants you to break up with him, so he's acting mean and distant with you. He's telling you that he doesn't love you anymore so that the hard part of the break up is left to you. Maybe it's because he's under peer pressure, or family pressure or he might have just about started to have feelings for another girl and he decided that he doesn't feel the same way about you. Guys tend to act mean and distant when they want to break up with you, maybe it's also the fact that he needs time and space for himself which is not possible because his relationship demands a lot of him. Even if you are the understanding type, even then, the guy feels that he has a lot of commitments which are top priority at the moment, and the relationship will take a back burner, so he doesn't want you to feel that he's not giving you time or you getting hurt, therefore breaking up with you could be a way of shielding you from the pain you might suffer in the future. I know this all sounds crazy, but it's true. He doesn't want you to end up feeling rotten when you're his gf, because his commitments would have taken up so much of his time and energy that he won't be able to do justice with you. So he feels that if you break up with him and start to hate him, it'll be easier on both of you, because then you'll be able to look for someone else and he'll be able to move on and take up his priorities. He's foreseen long-term pain if your relationship continues, and he wants to protect you from that.

This is one way of looking at it. The other side of the coin may be that he doesn't like you that much, so he wants to end the relationship because he sees no future, as in both of you getting married or going past the "pink" phase of the relationship, where both of you are lovey-dovey and not much will emerge in time. I can't take a negative stand on it, because he's said it in 3 days and this is pretty much why he would have said it as well. Think about it yourself... Do you see yourselves going ahead in the future? Do you see yourself married to him, say 7 years from now? Do you see both of you living a happily married life? If you don't, then let it go and share the feeling with someone who does see himself going this far with you. You'll be fortunate if that happens, because love strikes once, but I'm sure you'll find someone like him, probably even better than him, whom you can call your 'perfect' guy. That I guess sums up what is on his mind, so if you wanna talk to him about it, you can, it's safe to do so but don't over-react and get emotional, cos it's not gonna help either of you. :) I wish you all the luck!

Answer 2

Hmm, I don't know your history or anything, but id have to agree its not that easy to fall out of love as to fall in. It could be any number of things, maybe you loved him but not vice verse. Honestly its a wild card in my book, I had my own relationship flip over like this recently, its hard to tell whether its true or not so I am a firm supporter of the concept that "If someone tells you their stupid, they are stupid". Meaning if he is telling you that he doesn't love you, maybe he just doesn't. You gotta give him his time to figure it out, and if it doesn't work out, then maybe its better for you this way. Hard to hear it but sometimes its the truth. Good Luck.

Answer 3

move on.  it's not the end of the world.  there are plenty more guys out there.

Answer 4

he loves you but sounds scared to me like they say treat em mean keep em keen

Answer 5

he breaks up with u because he doesn't love u anymore. u just waisted ur five points just to ask this question

Answer 6

im a guy so im going to say that i think that he has another girlfriend but dont worry ur better then him anywayz.

Answer 7

i think he has a girlfriend on the side and maybe there is a lot less pressure on him

Answer 8

He's treating you like this because he is a guy.  That is what they do when they tire of one piece and are ready to move on and start hittin' another!  ...Or already have started hittin another.  You can't make someone love you.  Keep your dignity and move on.

Answer 9

he's mad.. this is an expression of emotional outburst towards you when he acts angry.

The opposite of love is complete indifference... NOT anger, hate, etc.

the fact he's upset is a sign he still feels something for you otherwise he would not be upset!  It's when he becomes indifferent and doesn't care one way or the other that it's truly over.

You must find out the reason WHY he's acting this way all of a sudden.  with emotional changes and the such it can be a sign of an affair or simply a change of heart that he is fed up with you for some reason that he has not disclosed and it's built up over time only to burst out in the open in the last 3 days.

if he wont talk to you, there are some psychological tricks you can work in the strategies outlined for getting your ex to return your call.  if you can get the lines of communication open calmly with one another then you need to discuss with him the reasons for his being upset and find out the true source of his irritation.

Might be something simple you can change or stop doing, or like I said it could be something entirely different such as an affair that is making him behave this irrationally.  Who knows..

there is hope in this situation very much so.

http://www.my-linker.com/hop/get-ex-back...

Answer 10

Even if he is mad he shouldnt be acting in this immature way.

Find another bf.

Answer 11

Just face the truth that your not THE one.. I know I don't have the right to judge but I think he didn't take you seriously cause it's imposible that after 3days, all of a sudden he dosen't love you anymore? I mean, where did that came from girl??

OR.. or maybe there's something going on in his life that triggered him to act like that.. We never know..

Answer 12

Probably cheating, but I won't get best answer unless you find that out in 3 days. Good luck.

Answer 13

Move on, that is the best thing you can do right now. If he really loves you as you said he is, then he will come running back to you ( i hope).  

Answer 14

maybe you did something wrong, ahm i have to say that, let him go, and if you think that he still loves you, he is the one who will crawl back, dont apologize or anything, just accept the fact, he will realize what he did someday

Answer 15

He is bitter b/c he feels guilty for not loving you anymore.  Im sure he still cares but he apparentlly wants out.  Let him go.  You trying to keep it going with him will just make him more and more resentful and delay the pain of a break up.

Answer 16

odds are he started seeing someone or he wants to start seeing someone. and if he says he doesnt love you anymore he never loved you in the beginning sorry to say. my advice go out with some close friends and party like theres no tomorrow for one night, and move on.

Answer 17

  He sounds like he is guilty of jumping the fence for another female or wants to really bad. My advice to you remain calm, take a valium if need be and say to him " Whew am i glad you feel the same way as i do, i didn't quite know how to break the news to you that you do not turm me on any longer"

    Then turn around and tell him " Gosh isn't this great how mature we can be about this, now come on i'll help you pack" and smile .

    Nothing more dangerous than a woman scorned :)

Answer 18

Hi.

My personal opinion. He means it when he says, "I just don't love you anymore." A guy who loves you would put in the effort to make your relationship work. The fact that he said that means he just want to end it.

- Celina Teo -

Answer 19

He told you he doesn’t love you anymore, that is most likely the truth. He may have come to this conclusion over a longer period of time and just decided to tell you. It is unlikely this decision was made over a 3 day period. It just seems that way to you. Unfortunately for you the only choice you have is move on with your life. Remember, there are plenty of fishes in the sea.