My boyfriend wants me to lose weight in order to marry me. Though I am overweight i find this confusing.

Question

My boyfriend wants me to lose weight in order to marry me. Though I am overweight i find this confusing.

Answer 1

Do not do not DO NOT marry this shallow jerk!

Almost everyone on the planet gains weight with age, you (and he!) are probably not any exception.  What happens if you have a baby?  So you're only worth loving if you're thin?  Not the kind of person I'd want to have a family with.  Dump that a**hole and find someone who can love and appreciate you for you are at any size and any age.  Oh, what if you lost weight and your b*****s shrank?  Would he then demand you have implants?

DON'T MARRY HIM!

Answer 2

here's the thing, guys can be really stupid at times.

he could have been trying to say "Honey, I really love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you.  I want us to have a happy and healthy relationship.  I feel like we both have things to work on before that and one of it is being physically healthy.  I just want us to be healthy."

or he could just be a complete jerk and you need to ditch him.

Answer 3

confusing AND disgusting. He has no right to say that to you.  

Answer 4

Yes, that is wrong. You should not lose weight for anybody but yourself. He should not pressure you like that. I think you could lose a lot of weight....by dumping him!

Answer 5

If he doesnt love you the way you are then dont marry him.

Answer 6

have you gained a lot of weight while you have been with him?  Maybe he is worried that you are unhealthy.  Maybe one of his parents has health problems due to weight and he is worried about marrying someone that might have the same conditions.  

If you don't think he is doing this for your own good, that he is just vain, I say dump him.  You deserve better.  

Answer 7

Tell him ok...but under one condition...

When you lose the weight...if other men start hitting on you and you think you might like to start seeing them...then its ok to go out with em

That will fix em

Answer 8

Don't marry this guy.  There will always be something he'll want you to change and that's not fair to you!  You can do better!

Answer 9

You shouldn't be with this guy. Lose some weight then find someone awesome.

For health reasons - you don't want all the diabetes, heart disease, and heart attacks that go with being fat, do you really?

Answer 10

Say "OK, I'm going to lose **however much he weighs** in five minutes"...

Then walk him to the door and kick him out.

Answer 11

So, to make sure I understand...he will only marry you if you lose some weight? I don't think you want to keep this boyfriend around. He is trying to change you and that isn't right. I could see if it was something you both have been talking about together for a long time but that isn't right - find someone who appreciates you!

Answer 12

if he wants you to do it because he thinks you will be happier and for your health then he's trying to set a goal.

but if its for his own selfish reasons then he doesnt sound worth it

in the end, whether you lose or not, its up to you!  

Answer 13

What is confusing?

Lose weight, get married.

Don't lose weight... maybe boyfriend will never propose.

Yes, maybe he seems shallow, but maybe he sees it in terms of future health problems.

Answer 14

I can see where he's coming from.  Most women let themselves go after they get married, so if you're overweight now, you'll probably get even bigger after marriage.  He just wants to make sure that his future bride doesn't become obese.

Answer 15

Sounds like he really doesn't love you that much. Dump him. The only person who you should lose weight for is yourself.

Answer 16

well he prob. cares for u and wants you to be healthy! whats wrong with loosing weight to keep him happy and worryfree?

Answer 17

Nothing wrong with a fat chick. They keep you warm in the winter and shady in the summer.

Answer 18

The only weight you should worry about losing for now is the boyfriend!

Answer 19

if you marry him he will order thsi for your kids  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TKCGe2Ezr...