My brother and sis-in-law asked me to help carry the baby for them because she cant carry. weird right?

Question

my husband says no because it is way to weird. and i know its even more weird that im asking this. but what do you think? would you do it? im so confused. i dont want to say no and hurt their feelings and they plan to pay me 10,000. i appreciate your reply and thank you for your time. please no rude comments. if you dont have anything smart or nice to say please dont reply. thank you! p.s i have two kids of my own to take care of.

Answer 1

This is a MAJOR decision, and either choice can have a huge impact on your relationship with your brother and SIL.  You have to consider your relationship with them -- is it strong enough to withstand the difficulties that can come with pregnancy?  Consider all the possibilities.  What if the baby had a birth defect?  What if you went into preterm labor or had a miscarriage or the cord strangled the baby?  Would they blame you?  Would your relationship be able to withstand this?  Also, if you have 2 kids, you surely know that you get very attached during pregnancy -- will you be able to give the child up to its parents after it's born?  What if they don't take as good of care of the child as you think you could?  Will you hold it against them?  There are SO many considerations besides just the money -- please make sure you think through all the possibilities before you make a decision either way!!!!

Answer 2

I don't think it's 'weird' really. I mean, i kind of get where they are coming from. If you want a baby bad enough, there are few things you won't do.

I don't think I could handle something like that emotionally. I mean technically it is 'their child'. It would be made up of his sperm and her egg. You would really just be the vessel. But to have something grow inside of you for 9 months, it's hard not to get attached. Giving it up after all that time would be pretty difficult.

You have the advantage though of doing it for family instead of strangers, so you will get to see your niece/nephew/child regularly.

I think you really just have some thinking to do alone and talking over to do with them.

Whatever you do, don't let your husband influence your decision. With all do respect, it is your body and your family. If he doesn't want to deal with a pregnant wife again, that's his problem

Do what you think is right.

Answer 3

Think long and hard before making a decison.  You will be putting your body through all lot to give somebody else a child.  ON the other hand it would be an incredible gift to your brother and his wife if you can do it.  This not to be taken lightly

Answer 4

its totally up to you. I wouldnt want to do it because i would be afraid once i gave birth to the baby i would get attached to it. i know weird. Hope you find the right answer. Good Luck and God Bless.

Answer 5

I think it would be a wonderful gift. However, you and your husband would have to be on board. Ask him why he thinks it's so weird, people have surrogates all the time. Maybe you four should sit down together. You also need to think about what you would do if you ended up on bed rest or if you miscarried. How would everyone handle that?

Answer 6

I don't think it is weird at all, but I think it is something you need to choose for yourself. There are a lot of factors to take into consideration.

Did you enjoy being pregnant? or was it awful?

Do you want more kids yourself?

do you think they will be good parents?

Are you close to them? Close enough to give them a kid?

I'm sure they don't expect an answer right away. Just take some time and think throughly about it.

Answer 7

I think it's a wonderful idea. I would do it.

Answer 8

To me its kinda wierd, i wouldn't do it if you have kids already its gonna be harder when your carring the baby. Just tell them you don't want to

Answer 9

I would do it!  Not for the money! If they have a stong relationship and would make great parents why not?  I dont see it as weird.  I see it as you just babysitting LOL.  Good luck with what ever you decided

Answer 10

I don't think it's weird, but ultimately it is your choice.  You have a family consider, however what better gift could you give them?  God Bless

Answer 11

Is 10,000 even enough to cover all the expenses??  If it were me....I don't think I could do it (I probably couldn't do it for anyone because I wouldn't be able to give up the baby haha).  I can understand why a sibling might ask that of you (knowing your history and that you're not a crazy person, etc) but then you would also have to see the kid all the time afterwards...would that bother you?  If your  husband doesn't agree, you should definitely take that into consideration, as well!

Answer 12

Ok if it's her eggs and his sperm..

No if it's your eggs...

I would not do this myself....

Answer 13

What would be wierd about it? It's family and what would be more wierd for them is a complete stranger carrying their baby.

Answer 14

I wouldn't do that for someone else... If they truly appreciated you, they'd offer more than 10 000 dollars. If that's all that they have, then I guess, they don't have enough money to raise a child.

Answer 15

no that isnt weird its something nice to do

Answer 16

I would do it for nothing.  Can you think of a better gift?

Answer 17

I think that is really nice of you. I couldn't do it because I wouldn't be able to give them the baby. But more power to you for helping with this.

Answer 18

I don't think it's weird.

Phoebe did it on 'Friends'!