My brother confronted me about an issue, thoughts?

Question

My brother, who I have a great relationship with, confronted me with a possible issue. He says when I'm around other people, I tend to put on a fake, friendly, almost sarcastic voice. He says he likes the way I talk to him better privately rather than this other voice used with other people. I don't put any thought into my voices and didn't really notice it at all, but I guess he obviously sees the difference.

While admittingly, I am somewhat hurt about this- I understand its the truth and he told me right out, this is something I can respect.

I can't just flip like a switch over night and immediately change my voice. It's impossible. But the fact that it is indeed something to be aware of when faced in future social situations is a good thing, right?

Answer 1

if you don't notice yourself putting on that fake voice around your friends, from now on look out for it, and when u do notice it, think about how you would talk with anyone else (like your brother) and just make a little subtle switch from the sarcastic sounding voice to the real you.

Answer 2

Many people tend to do this without being aware of it . Not necesarilly sarcastic, but some tend to be nicer, or anything else then they are with their close ones . It is a good thing he told you, and now that you are aware of this you can analyse yourself in future situations and actually see yourself from the outside and if you wil do this , you will be able to asses if your behaviour is acceptable or not .  

Answer 3

It might be helpful if you could find out from within yourself why you might be doing it & fix that - then you wouldn't always have to be on your guard with yourself.

It could possibly be cos you feel insecure around others and this causes you to be as you are. The fix to insecurity is to realise that you have as much a right to be on this planet as everyone else; that judgements either on them or yourself can be very destructive and, above all be respectful - everyone has their strengths & their stories.

Finally, before I get off my soapbox - don't beat yourself up over any of this!

Best wishes, UK

Answer 4

just act with other people like you would with your brother. Listen to them, and then envision your brother's face, then speak. Just don't think about it too much while you do it.  

Answer 5

Yes, you should be aware of it. Just don't worry about it too much.

Answer 6

My sister does this too. She doesn't come off as fake friendly and sarcastic but shy and not very friendly. I don't know her like that. She says she can't help it. But it would be nice if she wasn't like that around other people because she's a really great person and I don't want people getting the wrong impression of her. One of my friends already got the wrong impression of her, they said she was naive, but he's stupid and not my friend anymore for so many reasons. But I don't like that he thought that of her. It would be a good thing to TRY to work on it. But if it's not hurting anyone than I don't see why you should change it.

Answer 7

well honestly you are going to act diffrently around other people then your own fmily because you are trying to fit in with them as much as possible. family on the other hand exepts you for who you are. and a much as your brother seems like he is trying to point this out. no matter what you will always be a litte more sarcastic.edgy.and flexable with friends compared to family..