My brother in law is a petophile that spent a year in jail. And I'm expected to take my kids around him?

Question

My husbands, sisters husband, plead guilty to molesting a little girl that was in a day care his wife, my sister in law, owned (in home daycare). He only spent a year in there and my in laws can't admit the possability that he did it. They said he was being railroaded, the judge was up for reelection and that he was scared of being put away for longer and that's why he plead guilty. "The little girls family was just out for money, and they got what they wanted. They won their lawsuit". That is what they tell me. They had a b'day pty for my mother in law over there and I took my kids to my moms. I made an excuse so not to hurt anyones feelings and cause them to get angry with me. Then yesterday my husband had to do some work for his mom at the sisters house for his mom. They live in a neighboring town so me and the kids went so we could visit someone else after he left. I was just going to wait in the car with the kids for him. His mom and sister insisted that we come in. When I kept making excuses as to why we were waiting the car they came out and asked me if it was because of what happened. I was honest, she cried, his mom got mad at me.Said I shouldn't have upset her that she is sick. Now I feel bad. I know he couldn't do anyting with me right there, but I don't want him having thoughts about my kids, while they are running around playing. She said other people know them and trust them with their kids, that we should know he wouldn't hane done anything.

Why do these people take his side?

Why can't they admit that it's possible?

Why does it upset them that I don't trust him?

Should I be concerned about them being near him when other people are around?

Am I wronge?

Answer 1

No your not wrong for feeling this way at all. Your doing the right thing and that's preventive protection. s***w your in-laws anyways. Your children come first and they need to accept the fact that he went to jail for a " CRIME " that " HE " committed. F-ck, are they that stupid or what. This kind of **** go's on all the time in our country at any time and any place.Mother's are always protective over their children and will love them no matter what happens. She needs to get a grip on reality and face the facts here. Even after years of counseling ( If he's going at all " I would still not trust him. You know what they say about a dog who's broke into the chicken house. Once they get the taste for chicken, they keep going back for more and more.

Answer 2

First off, when there are others around he can't do anything and if he tries they can stop him. Secondly, they are taking his side because it's there child or sibling, and you need to look at it from their viewpoint. If this was one of your children and they had gone through what he has gone through, how would you feel about your son or daughter? I'm not taking sides mind you, but you really don't know if he did it or not, now do you? You can take your children around him, but if you feel that there is a danger involved, then just don't let them be alone with him.

Answer 3

NEVER TRUST HIM!!! It's your job to protect your children. They come first.

Answer 4

i cant blame u..i think the law is he should not be around kids anyway..check out megans law and see what that says

Answer 5

Your children do come first. There is nothing wrong to visit with them but DON'T LEAVE YOUR KIDS ALONE WITH HIM OR THEM. The fact is they are in denial and often times someone is not guilty. Rarely but it does happen. Sure the sister is sick I would be too. What does she have to say about the situation?

You didn't say how old your children are but surely you have talked to them about no one should touch them and etc and to tell you if they do no matter who it is (don't mention the uncle). Reassure them they won't hurt mommy and daddy if though the person might tell them they would. Or hurt them. Good Luck

Answer 6

dear ricky b

i know its a little complaicated but you might want to really look into the case of your relative because nowadays when a little child boy are girl just points to someone and say they touched me the cops do not investigate anymore they just throw you jail do to megans law in california  

Answer 7

These people have rationalized that your BIL is not a predator. You haven't, and shouldn't. They're angry because you are not buying into the myth of his innocence. If they get mad, fine. Your kids should not be put at risk and they should never be around him no matter who else is there. People tend to leave the room. End of story.

Answer 8

i'm not sure the depth of the case or the evidence that was presented in the courtroom. if you are aware of this, then you should be able to make a fair assessment of his guilt. there are lots of innocent people in jail right now. LOTS. some whom have even proved their innocence are still in jail. remember that when dealing with him. now if you feel fear, that is something else. you have a right to protect your kids. just don't say anything else again. keep your kids away, but do so in a non-chalant way. what about moving to another state?