My brother is 17 and irresponsible!HELP!

Question

Hes not a bad kid at all, no drugs no s*x nothing of that sort. His issue is being irresponsible with money and paying attention to the things hes doing. At work they don't take him seriously. When he's late our boss calls' me instead of him! My mom blames me for her mistakes, why isn't he responsible? I'm a responsible man, I tell him what not to do, yet he makes mistakes, a lot of them. I want to know methods on how to help him. Sometimes I wonder what if there is something wrong with his brain?

Answer 1

Have you considered that maybe it's because he's... 17?

Seriously. He's just a high school kids. He's still learning how to run his life. He doesn't have "something wrong with his brain." He's 17. He's going to make mistakes, just like you did when you were 17.

Answer 2

hes just immature and needs to be taught responsibility. im sure if his boss fired him for being late, he'd learn that he needs to arrive on time at his next job  

Answer 3

As a counselor, I have experience in working on these kind of issues.  The main thing to do is to stop fixing his problems.  People tend to learn from the natural consequences of their actions and if they are saved from such consequences, they may not learn.  This could be the case of your brother.  That and his age...he's a teen and he's still growing and discovering himself, so this may be part of that whole process.  Let him know that you are there to support him emotionally and love him, but you cannot rescue him all the time.  He has to deal with the consequences of his actions.  Hope this helps.

Answer 4

That is a cruel thing to say if there is something wrong with his brain. You have no right to say that.

Everyone makes mistakes and I am sure you have made mistakes as well. You have no control of his life. You are not his mother. Just mind your own business and worry about your own life. I am an older sister and I have never put down my brother the way you have here. Shame on you!!!

Answer 5

Sadly, sometimes the best thing to do, is let him learn from his mistakes.

Eventually, he'll put himself in a hole that you'll need to help him out of,

when you do, he may appreciate it, and realize you were right all along.

I know this isn't much help.

But good luck!