My dad has a back injury that wont let him return back to work so he says he is being forced into

Question

early retirment. My question is most people who retire get a retirement party. Since I am the only daughter out of 3 that does ANYTHING for my parents do you think I should throw him a retirement party now or wait till later. He is 57 right now so hes upset that he has to retire but I was thinking this might make it a little easier on him.

thanks

Answer 1

I would check with your mom and get her to feel him out about having a retirement party before actually doing one. It's a great idea but you want him to enjoy the party and not be upset by having one thrown for him.  

Answer 2

I think that is a sweet idea

Go for it

See if you can get your siblings involved too.

Answer 3

You may want to rethink the party. Your dad is going through many negative emotions right now.

I hurt my neck at work in 2000, and had to give up the career I had for 13 years and was the only thing I knew how to do. I became depressed, I was in A LOT of pain, I had multiple surgeries and many painful procedures. Your dad is not going to want a party.

I understand that you want to support him and help him to feel better, but a party isn't it. He will have to come to terms with being unable to do the job he's had for many years. It took me at least 5 years to get past it. He will probably be angry for a long time. Try to be understanding.

That said, there are programs through unemployment that will help retrain people who have been hurt and cannot do the jobs they used to do. He can get the info from unemployment when he goes for his intake to get unemployment checks.

Edit:  I read your further details. I am very sorry for your dad. Even being on permanent disability with a check coming in regularly, his feelings of worthlessness will probably be high. I know mine were when I had to leave the job I loved, and no one else would hire me in the industry because I, too, was a liability.

But there are many people who can still be productive while disabled. He might turn a hobby into a money making venture.

As an example, if he likes to make bird houses, he could make and sell those. Again that was only an example. And he would have to watch how much he makes in order not to lose his disability.

Just let your dad know that there are other people out there in the same boat he is in. You could also try to find a support group for people in his situation. Those can be a great help.