My dad is always buying me stuff and it makes my mom mad!

Question

Okay, last week my dad called and he's like, Zena what color Nintendo DS do you want? And in my mind i was like, WTH?!?! Did I ever even ask for a DS? I am waaaaay too old for one! But I calmly told him I dont want one. But he got it anyway, and he came home with a shiny new pink ds and a game. My mom and I were really mad, but I didn't show it.. I think he got me it because I recently complained to him that my brother is always hogging the tv and playing xbox so i never get to watch. so i guess he thought if he got my my own video game, that would make me happy. I am mad because he is wasting money on stuff we dont need or want! and when he brought the ds, he was soooo stubborn and opened the ds and gameright away and SWORE to god he wont return it. and then when I told him i dont want it he said why are siding with your mom! need to have a personality, dont! I know you want it! it's like she is a dictator over your life! I may sound like a brat but I'm not because I DONT WANT to be spoiled. . another time he bought me a sweatshirt for $60! I felt so bad, like it's my fauIt he is wasting money. I feel blessed to actually have a dad that gets me stuff.

Answer 1

This problem is serious.  First, your dad doesn't listen to what you tell him, or doesn't seem to believe what you say.  Much more important than the waste of money is the question of what will happen when it is really important for him to hear you and believe you.  Maybe he is insecure about how you feel about him.  (Parents can be insecure just as well as anyone else can.)  You already understand that your dad loves you and is trying to show it.  The frustration is that he is trying in the wrong ways, and that calls for some communication, difficult though it will be.  Since your dad isn't listening, have you talked to your mom about how you feel?  If that doesn't work, you might have to get suggestions from someone who can give you serious advice, such as a counselor or another adult relative, like a favorite aunt or uncle.  Dealing with adult behavior can be tricky, and you want as much help as you can get.

Answer 2

If your dad wants to spend money on you then let him, all he wants to do is spoil you.  Just because he gets you stuff that does not mean you should act spoil.  He probably just wants to be a good dad.  All my life my dad was not their, he never did anything for me, my brother and my sister.  But he do more for his other kids than us if though its not a lot and he is not even with their mother.