My daughter does not want to play volleyball in college. How can I get her interested in doing so?

Question

My daughter is good at volleyball. She will be a junior this year and she plays on her school and a club team. She is very good at her sport, but she does not want to play in college because she thinks it will be too much work and not enough social time. In other words, she is a bit lazy.

If she does not get a scholarship, even to a junior college, I cannot afford to pay for her college and she will wind up only going to the local community college and living at home while attending classes.

Is there something I can say to let her know how exciting it would be to play in college? Something to get her to realize what a great opportunity this would be and that she shouldn't be afraid of working hard.

Thanks for your advice.

Answer 1

Tell her what you just told us!  And one thing she should realize is that her team in college will be like her second family.  She will become friends and have a social life with the girls on her team.

You could even tell her that getting a scholarship opens up so many opportunities to her. Traveling, Education, and so much more.

Good Luck!  (:

Answer 2

Boy, I'm glad you aren't MY mom. Sheesh!

Answer 3

Just  ask her where she's going to get the money to go to  college without a full scholarship. I think it averages around 50,000 a year to go to a four year scholl or something like that.

Answer 4

i am playing in college now and i am THRILLED about it. however, half the reason i tried so hard to play was because my mother was dead set against it. if you try to force her to do something she is no longer interested in you are only going to turn her off to the sport and make her resent it more. i have seen it happen to many of my peers. one thing i can say is that all of the best players i have seen were also great at other sports, even if they never had any actual coaching. if she is only a junior she still has time to get involved in other sports that might interest her more. if you can get her excited about a sport- any sport, she will do much better somewhere she wants to be.

Answer 5

you cant make her do something that she doesnt want to do but if she ends up not playing then she will realize that she was wrong and then she will start to listen to you more and im sure that that wont happen agin. but she negotiate with her...

Answer 6

jus have her watch a movie about volleyball that is really hot but truly she has to make her own decision jus tell her how it is and let her make the decision

Answer 7

just a thought tell her that she would get a lot of atention for people and GUYS

and  tack her to a bad comunity college and that will be the only one that you can aford if se does not get a scalership

Answer 8

I am sorry, and I know that you wont be able to afford for her to go to college, but you can't force her to like volleyball. She may be good, but if you make her play she will resent you and most likely quit in the middle of the school year. Whats wrong with going to a community college, as long as she is getting an education you shouldn't worry. She wouldn't be lazy so she wants a social life. Let her walk on her two feet. Let her find her own way!!!! Don't worry if you believe in her she will make the right decision, and you should support her!!!

Answer 9

Nothing! You don't need to force her to do anything. If she doesn't want to play in college, then tell that you will only pay for her to play high school ball. & she wants to play club, that she can pay for it herself.. that will save alot of money in itself. but she doesn't need to be forced into anything b/c then she may have a bad attitude about everything & she won't enjoy her college years.

Answer 10

You've got two seperate issues here.  One, you're making community college sound like its a punishment!! Don't lose focus on the idea that your daughter is a STUDENT-athlete. The more college courses she takes, the better.  It doesn't matter where she gets them from, I promise.  Plus that, if she's living at home while she's learning how to be an adult, you've got a great chance at making that transition smoother. (And who says you have to pay for her college anyhow? That's what student loans are for!)

Two, if you try to force her to play, she'll not only hate the game, but you for a while, as well.  Ease back.  She's only a junior right now anyhow.  I went through a phase my junior year of high school where I hated how much everyone was talking about me playing college ball so much that my high school achievements were totally overlooked!!  Celebrate what she's doing NOW!  Be involved in that!  

Most importantly....be her biggest fan.  That way, whether she goes to college or not, she still knows that you're rooting for her.

Answer 11

i dont mean to be rude or mean but it is her choice weather to play or not. you dont have to pay for her college either. she can have a job and take out some loans. my two olders sisters are paying their way through college and my little brother and myself will have to do the same. you could help sometime with books but she needs to learn to be independent. as for volleyball it is her choice and you shouldnt control her life. this may come as a shocker but she needs to be happy with her choices. and needs to be able to make her own choices.

Answer 12

You might use the paragraph in your question starting with "If she does not get..."  

Explain the options.  College scholarship-live away from home.  No college scholarship-live at home.  That would have motivated me when I was that age.  

If that does not work, take her to a college match.  D1 if you are close to one.  See if you can talk to a player.  College volleyball is a lot like your daughter thinks it is.  Lots of hard work and lots of hours on the road during the fall.  But it is also fun.  

The last thing is to not push too hard.  If you push hard, I will guarantee that she will not play in college.  Guide her, but do not force her.  

Good luck.

Answer 13

Playing college ball was better than any other social life that I could imagine.  Social life is important to some extent, but will not fulfill her as a sport will.  She has to want it and if she is lazy she won't cut it in college.  It is ten times more difficult than high school and they expect a hundred times more.  It is a lot of work.  You really have to have that special fire and desire to play college or it just won't work....or you won't even make the team in the first place.  If she gets a scholarship for volleyball ask her to give it a try for a year.  If she doesn't like it she can choose to do other things.  Explain to her that you cannot afford to pay for college and this is her one and only opportunity unless she pays herself.  I would have her high school coach talk with her and also try to get an appt. with a college coach and have him talk to her....that is if she is good enough and if they are looking for her to play there.  If she is such a social butterfly is she interested in college for study or would she just be goofing off.  She sounds a bit immature and that is common, but she needs to start getting serious.  Truthfully, there is nothing more obnoxious than the little social butterfly group who is only concerned with being social and being seen.  Help her to understand her opportunities.  Without a college education these days, she will most likely be stuck in a job that she is just doing because everywhere else requires a degree.  Make a deal so that she at least goes for it for a year....then she will be on her own and at least you know you tried.  More importantly, make sure she doesn't go to a school where all her friends are going.  Be tough, you are the parent.

Answer 14

Tell her what you just told us.

Answer 15

The worst thing you can do as a parent is Force her to do that

which she doesn't want to do.  There is nonthing wrong with her having a social life And it doesn't mean she is lazy.

You also make it sound like a local CC is not good enough education - I have an AA from a local CC and I've done all right.

I agree with her to the point that doing it in college will be different - the drive will be to Win and sometimes at any cost.

Some of these coaches think that by being a tough as nails

DI is the only way - I disagree.

Maybe you should cut her some slack and let her make some

decisions - you can't control her life.

If she sees that the volleyball coach is ok and not a tryant - then who knows.

By the way I'm 60.

Answer 16

Tell he she is good and that if she doesn't do it she won't go to a good college.