My daughter is 12 and has problems with friends at school, they say?

Question

mean things to her and she wants to retaliate only when it's necessary. Why are kids mean? We are also going to move to a new suburb and hopefully she will be able to adjust. What are some of the things she needs to do in order to fit in and be liked? she is a good person and has her own mind. she does not succumb to peer pressure. all she wants is to have some really good friends that's all.

Answer 1

I think it is a terribly difficult society thees days for kids. We have such a high pressure enviroment and it has been like that for at least a decade. Just encourage her to be herself, ALL THE TIME. And the people that deserve to have her as a friend will turn up. Also, try putting her in sports or some kind of extra curricular activity. That could stimulate "team work" which more often than not can lead to a friendship. I hope I helped. Just remember, its better to have her be friends with just a couple of people than thrown in with the mislead kids cause thats where she thinks she fits in at....

Answer 2

I have a 14yr old who will be 15 in just a few days and he has had social problems since the age of about 11. I have always praised him for being himself which helps with the self-esteem that these other children are damaging. I have also personally told him stories about the "popular" kids in school and the "nerds" or "rejects" and since we still live in the same small town I have been able to tell where those very ppl are today. That popularity is just happiness for a short time and that most of those ppl didn't amount to much after school was over. I know that is no immediate fix for my child like it won't be for your child but it helps your child to know that you can relate to them and that bullying isn't something that has started recently..that it is a problem that strikes every decade. I have even gone as far as telling him about the days that I was bullied. As far as comebacks, I have told my son to say things like...At least I can spell all the words that I say. Mainly because he gets picked on alot for his small size and his inability to compete very well in sports. Children are very mean these days and girls are so much more cattier than boys and for the friends of mine who have girls with the same problem I have always heard them telling their daughters to ignore the comments because as females...being ignored is much more demeaning than being "cut-down"

Answer 3

So im 15 and all she needs to do is be nice and outgoing, or if shes not like that im sure she will find a friend. She needs to be HERSELF, dont say things or lie cause peope will always find out. and if people are being mean to her she needs to talk to them about it especially if the are her "friends" cause they dont sound like it to me. tell her i said hey =]

haha

good luck love

-katelyn

Answer 4

Get her involved in some extra curricular activities at her new school.  If she is into dance, drama, sports....anything where she will meet new people and have to work with them as a team will help.  Not only will she make new friends, but it will help build her self esteem.  Let her have sleepovers, invite kids over for movie night, etc.!  Just make sure she knows that it is not about popularity, that can fade.  It is about building strong, lasting relationships that will last a lifetime.

Answer 5

try to find out why exactly they're picking on her. narrow it down, and then try to fix that particular problem. for example, if its her clothes, get her some that are more in style. if its her looks, can't do too much about that, but you can make her look a little better. things that you can reasonably change, you should change. and tell her to be friendly and sociable with others and to act like the insults don't get to her one bit. this attitude will deter them.