My daughter is becoming attached to me...?

Question

my daughter Madison, 2, was knocked into the pool by my parents dog. she went under for about 3 - 5 seconds. now she will not leave my side. she won't even go to my husband/her dad. she didn't take a shower by herself, I had to take one with her. yesterday and today we went on a boat (not sailing, we were restocking the mini fridges) and yesterday she was ok, she put her head down, closed her eyes and kept saying "no more boat, bad boat". but today she screamed and cried her eyes out, I had to go calm her down back at the car. we are taking the boat out and sailing it on labor day. I mean she only screamed and cried when we were on the main deck, when we went to the lower part she stopped and just had a snack with me. so that's not a problem. my question is how can I at least try to loosen' her up?

and I also think the reason she is attached to me is because I was the one who brought her up from under water...

Answer 1

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Answer 2

shes afraid of it happening again! she thinks that if she's with u, she'll be safe. a way to get her calmer is to get her in a pool agAIN (swimming lessons if u dont want to teach her) and have ur husband come in the pool with both of u so she gets used to it being the 3 of u

Answer 3

She was traumatized around water, and you are her mother.  You'll have to slowly ease her back into liking the water again.  Take her in the shower with you, get the bath and have a bubble bath and play in the water with her, maybe take her swimming and play with her in the water, make it fun so she knows water can be fun.  It will probably take a while to get her accustomed to it again, just let her be clingy, she's scared.  

Answer 4

just a little patience and talking to should calm her down, but her fear is justified by being knocked into the pool.  reassure her that boats and water are fun and by no means be hostile with her when she becomes scared.  

Answer 5

she sounds so sweet&nice i think she is like that because she is afraid of the water&thinks something is going 2 hurt her

Answer 6

Buy a baby pool with really shallow water for her, and let her splash around until she gets used to it.

But since when do 2 year olds take showers/baths by THEMSELVES?!?

Answer 7

I think, the real problem is not that she can't be without you, but she is afraid of water now, hence the thing with the shower and the boat. But of course, scared child clings to mummy.

I think, she may completely grow out of it - or develop fear of water for life - and I am not sure how to tell the difference. Don't push her, that's for sure. Don't ever scold her for being afraid of water, boats, pools, showers, etc. Be fun and relaxed and try conveying to her how much fun water is to you - and subtly teach her how to swim.

Answer 8

i think she is scared of water now and i think you have to show her that it's okay just show her that she'll be fine no matter what!  

Answer 9

Very traumatic for a two year old!  I would try to get her into the water again.  Make sure you are with her and don't push her beyond comfort but maybe splash on the edge or throw rocks into the lake... anything to help her understand that the water wont harm her and it can be fun.  Sit down and explain to her what happened and ask her to talk about it.  Kids need to express how they feel when these things happen and let it out.  Maybe get her a little kiddie pool to splash in.  If this happened recently I wouldn't take her on the boat.. she could still be terrified by what happened.  Give her some time, let her talk about it all she wants and try to get her to play with some sort of water.  Good luck and sorry this happened!  

Answer 10

Try to get her attached to other people if you cant just leave it alone she will like other people.

Answer 11

Hi,

I know you're probably afraid that she's going to be like that forever, but she won't. she's only traumatized and time is a healer.

You don't have to do anything at all, she will go back to herself when the memory of the trauma starts to vanish. Just be patient and give her all your love in the meantime.

My 6 year old broke her arm 8 weeks ago and even do she's not glued to me anymore, she's still having trouble going to sleep and she's worried about everything,

Good luck!

Answer 12

You have to be patient.  But encourage her to leave your side and encourage her to go into the water too.  You don't want her to continue with fears like these for the rest of her life.  But patience, commitment, and love will help her.  Best of luck.

Answer 13

It was a very frightening experience.

Give her a few days and, unless she brings it up, don't talk it or remind her.  Children are resilient and bounce back.  You are what she finds as a safe in her life.  Just continue to make her feel safe and she will loosen up.

Answer 14

It's only natural that your daughter would be frightened from leaving your side. Its very scary to be under water for a baby girl! I suggest giving her love and support and letting the phase work it self out. She's still a baby in many ways, and tough love, trying to get her to "loosen up" might only make the problem worse.

Keep her away from water for a little while, and maybe play some family games with her, you, and daddy so she can forget about her problems. If you're afraid she's not spending enough time with dad, make sure he's there when you read to her at night, give her a bath, etc. Really though, it'll work itself out as long as you remain understanding to the fact that she's been through a traumatic experience.

Answer 15

she sounds really sweet, poor her

Answer 16

You might just have to avoid the water until she better able to deal with her emotions. She so little she probably is having trouble processing that fear and she might for awhile. You could try talking to her but again shes just a baby still so she might not understand. If you keep exposing her to water when she isnt comfortable with it she could end up with a major phobia. Be supportive of her and encoraging as well as validating her feeling and making her understand that you do understand why shes upset. Your probably right that she wants to be next to you because you pulled her out and thats normal. Give her time and she should loosen up on her own. This all might take sacrifice on your part by giving up time on the boat or near the pool etc. If this problem seems long lasting it might be in her and your best interest to see a child psychologist for help and advice.