My daughter is off the hook! help me.please.?

Question

my child is 16 ,we moved two years ago and since then she has changed so much.she use to be this sweet little girl and now she is in so much trouble.she has picked up charges,she has been stealing at the mall, and now she has another open charge. but i did not tell her p/o she has this charge. she is going to be locked up when she finds out, but me being the mom i love my child, she is wrong for doing what she did but i don't want to be the one to tell on her.but she has'nt changed because of the move. its the same kids she been hanging around and the same place,and she is more of an influicne on them so it not her friends .its her what do i do!!!!!!

Answer 1

You should get really close to her! tell her how she feels about stuff!

Answer 2

talk to her about her behavior, and tell her that you are ready to trust her and if she can trust you, if that doesn't work take her to a psychologist,maybe she needs someone to talk to about her problems.

Answer 3

As the parent you have to be mean and put your foot down.  I know it is difficult and not fun, but that is your job. She needs to be grounded and I think she should be made to do something she hates as punishment. Like maybe do some community service or some horrible chores.  Don't be such a lightweight about it. YOU ARE IN CHARGE.  Sure you love her. Do you want her to make so many wrong choices that she ends Pregnant or on Drugs or Dead?  Break the cycle now. It may be too late.

Answer 4

you need to be tougher! just tell her what she did wrong, shes not really a baby anymore and she can handle the consequences if she could have the nerve to do the act.  

Answer 5

Take her to a child shrink. A shrink will be able to understand her and make both you and your child understand why and what you two should be doing about her behavior.

Good luck.

Answer 6

I see why she is continuing to rack up charges on probation.  Because her mother cant step up to the plate and tell her she is wrong so in her mind you dint care if she gets in trouble

Her PO probably already knows about the charges and when she goes to court the judge will know she is on probation so lying and not telling them will just get her in more trouble

Answer 7

Maury show or jerry springer that will do

Answer 8

you really cant do anything she is gonna do what she wants to do girls at that age dont wanna listen and they dont care if they get in trouble she probably will stop cause she wont like the distraction of court and p.o and everything like that trust me the only way you are going to know is by talking to a 16 or 17 year old .. no offense but you adults talk together about it and try to help each other out its not gonna get you anywhere you have to talk to someone her age so you can understand on there age level like me im 17 i do it and had all that but i try to stay away from that cause i hate going to court and everything like that but i would tell her that shes going to jail or juvie cuz shes not gonna be to happy if  they just take her away one day and if you dont tell her before it happens then she is gonna hate you for not telling her cause she wont be prepared for it

shes not gonna stop getting into trouble somehow though

shes probably doing alot worse things then getting summons trust me i know but if you put to much pressure on her and bug her to much she is gonna drift away from you

dont get her a shrink she will kill you

dont take her stuff away she will act out and do more stuff

and if shes in jail bail her out cuz you love her

seriously

Answer 9

You need to get some help for her, now - not tomorrow.  Through your pediatrician, you can get a referral for a counselor.  Good luck!  The teenage years are tough for all of us, but the good news, if you can get through the next 3 years, she will turn out fine.

Get her some professional help today!

Answer 10

Let her get locked up, let her learn her lesson. She will be an adult soon so have tough love on her now because society isn't going to show her any mercy

Answer 11

Its difficult but hopefully she will grow out of it before she does something really serious. All kids are rebelious to a certain extent.

Answer 12

Let her pay the consequences of her actions and let her go to jail!  Maybe she'll learn a thing or two!   Don't worry, the PO will find out without you, but, if you REALLY loved her you would have told.  Her facing what she has coming is better for her than you protecting her and you know it!  Perhaps she is in this trouble because of you protecting her in the past instead of letting her take the punishment she should have had.  Something turned your sweet little girl into a trouble maker, if it isn't her following her friends, then it must be her home life!  Sounds like you've been way to easy on her.  I doubt this is the first time she's been in trouble.  What was she doing alone at the mall.  Just because other parents let their children run wild, doesn't mean you have to.  YOU are the parent!  So she hates you for making her stay home, better than her being in jail!  You knew you couldn't trust her, and now you will never be able to!  Your daughter is a CRIMINAL and you're trying to protect her, see why shes in trouble in the first place?

Answer 13

being 16, i find that my friends do influence me the most. the thirst to be popular is overwhelming and a lot of us go to extreme lengths to be popular. the older we get the more pressure there is and we are introduced to more things that are the "popular" thing to do like drink, do drugs, and have s*x behind our parents back. my friends do this and you would never guess they would do this because they are top students but their parents have no clue. sorry to say that us teens are sneaky. there may be something in your daughter's friends you aren't seeing, they may well have put the pressure on her to do these things. i know i get a lot of pressure from my friends to do stupid things even when i know they are wrong. sorry if this didnt help much. good luck

Answer 14

don't cover for her. if you bail her out of these jams she will never be held responsible and suffer consequences for her actions

Answer 15

I'm guessing P/O means parole officer. d**n, I didn't know kids could be on parole. Anyway, you should give her a choice, accept a punishment from you (ex: take away her car for a couple months) or turn herself in to her PO.  

Answer 16

Hello there,

                 16 really sucks. You can only be the best mum you can be. Supporting her habits of stealing by lying to the police is not setting an example. My parents were very strict and I rebelled heaps when I was 16. Its a huge change in your life physically, socially and emotionally. You stated you moved two years ago? The early teen years are so hard and my parents didnt understand my reasons. To me it sounds like a cry for help. If you really care for your child you must allow them to make then learn from their own mistakes.

Even if this means getting in trouble with the law. Maybe it would be an eye opener and if your daughter does have half a brain she will see the path in what lays ahead. I have two sweet little girls I only hope they are not as bad as I was at that age.

I suggest thinking back to when you were her age and the major changes that have occurred. Work with your daughter not against her. Who else does your daughter have when the &^%* hits the fan????

Try sitting down with her and laying all the cards out on the table. Even if this includes explaining the costs or her moving out and becoming more independent.

Good Luck

Answer 17

Grow up and tell your daughter what she did wasn't right.

Answer 18

I'm 17 years old, and have done all the drugs, fought some good fights, even got 1/2 price for things i'd steal for people! my point is....if she hasn't been to jail...i'd strongly suggest it. it tore my mother apart, but sometimes tough love is your last resort ya know? it scared the **** out of me, i read the bible 3 times in a week!  i know you don't want to, but take it from someone who went through it all! it's what kept me out of trouble! aso...try making her get a job, it will keep her occupied. The wake-up call on the drugs though....that was the death of my best friend to oxycottons, and if she's into the drugs....all i can say is intervention. hope i was of some assistance. Best of luck!

Answer 19

Try tough love. No mother wants to see their child locked up, but I think it might help her see the error of her ways. Better to see her in juvi than the adult prison system. She probably doesn't realize how serious her offenses can be dealt with. And mom, why are you letting her hang out anywhere but home? She ought to be in trouble with you for her behavior, too, not just her p.o. Let her actions determine her freedoms. Her p.o. will find out sooner or later, so get ready for it. I wish you & your daughter the best of luck.

Answer 20

I'm sorry to hear that. You must be in a very tough position. I really wish I can help, I would tell the p/o. but she is your daughter, so I understand you're predicament. I would honestly seek some legal help or advise..

Answer 21

This Will Sound Strange But Apply For A Talk Show They Always Want Trouble Some Teenagers And They Make Them Realize What They're Doing

Answer 22

Oh no! This is awful! She needs to find Christ.  

I know women who have been to jail and it is an incredibly terrible experience. However, maybe that's what she needs to get her to realize that there are consequences for her actions.

Your username is honesty. It must be very important to you. Don't lie to cover up for your daughter. She really needs to learn from her mistakes. I wish you the best with your daughter and I am praying for you.

Answer 23

Get her some professional help.

If you really care about her.  She must be miserable.

Answer 24

take her phone and everything else and ground her 4 2 months

Answer 25

Okay,she is not a sweet little girl anymore.She is a rebellious teenage girl....and so am I.....well im not rebellious anymore,but I used to be just as bad.To make me stop,my mother would spend more time with me....she would take me out shopping or something....but sometimes she had to put her foot down.

Answer 26

Listen,  I think we need more information than that. I think you need more information from your daughter. Just listen to her, and don't talk, she will tell you what is wrong.

Don't listen to what I say, just beat the h**l out of her.

"Talk to" is not listen

Here is quote from past question "They just need me there to say what they want to say"

Get her a job, so there is no need to steal. No time to do anything bad.

Answer 27

For the sake of your daughter, you need to snitch her out. I know it sounds terrible but she will never learn if she doesnt face the consequences of her actions.

You may consider changing schools for her and if you can afford it, private schools.

You need to be up in her business and hard core. She may act like she hates you but in all honesty, you are her mom first, not her friend.

She is going through a rebelious time in her life and its up to you to be the best parent you can. You cant let her run lose and out of control.  

Answer 28

i think that u should turn her in obviously what she is doing is not good and it is only getting worse. jail might be hard for u to have ur daughter in but if she keeps up with the way she is going it will only get worse and lead to probably jail or even worse. ud be helping her even if it doesnt feel like it good luck

Answer 29

My pastor Good Love says stop babying her and lock her up. She needs tough love and maybe she will learn from this experience.  

Answer 30

It’s hard to tell you this, but it sounds like your daughter has aids.

One thing I would recommend to keep her out of trouble or risking her aids spreading is getting her into hobbies that she would enjoy, like gardening, or fridge magnet designing.

Does she often come in a 4am smelling of cardboard? Yes, this is because her and her friends have been eating it, which is common for children of this age who have aids.

Pretty soon she will be causing minor inconveniences such as leaving your tap running, not closing the curtains at night and replacing your dog with a cat. Then the pain begins I assure you.

With affordable AIDS drugs arriving in many poor countries, experts say a startling and worrisome side effect has emerged: in some patients, the treatment uncovers a hidden leprosy infection.

Yes that’s right; your child has aids now, but could soon have leprosy too.

I recommend you trade your daughter for a more useful possession such as sticks for your legs in case one day you find you cannot stand up without falling down, this way you will save yourself from embarrassment.

Hope this helps!!

Answer 31

Its Probably

1. Old/Small House

2. You Dont Show Love By Going To Dinner with her and just randomly saying I Love You

3. She has no dad