My daughter wants to be a writer. She has won her district writing contest. Do you think her writing is good?

Question

My life is not an ordinary one. In case you were wondering, my name is Claire Eckleston. I used to be named Claire Doublon, but my mom died when I was six and, I was adopted by Nicole Eckleston. When I first met her, she cut off all but 8 inches of my golden hair, and it grew back brown and stick-straight. Her husband, Michel, doesn’t like kids. He acts as if I am not even there, but I live with it.

When I first began school at Coverton Elementary, I had no friends. Once in a while I saw my neighbor, James, in his yard, but I didn’t count him as a friend…yet. Being neighbors, and three blocks from school, we both walked the same route twice a day. Week after week, I walked, watching him as we traveled to and from school. Finally, in the front yard, Nicole told me it wasn’t safe to be walking alone for ‘so many’ blocks. At that moment, James walked by. Being young and foolish he yelled to her, “I’ll walk with her!” And it was done.

Answer 1

Didn't you post this already?

Her writing is OK...very similar to my daughter's writing so I really could not tell you how good it is as I have nothing to compare it to.

Answer 2

Wow that was exceptional. She definitely has a future in writing!!! (I am a book worm :-)). How old is she? She writes like a 20 year old or older. I also prefer your daughters version over the one suggested above, It is much more original and gripping. When she gets her first publication, please send us the title!!!!!

Answer 3

DId you ask this already?

Answer 4

she has a lot of potential... i think if you tossed a few more descriptive details and revision techniques in there, her story would be stellar!

Answer 5

WOW. Put this kid in a program already

Answer 6

yes this is good, is there more? i want to know what happens!! how old is your daughter? she has a definate talent that shouldnt be wasted. PS i prefer your daughters version of her story, not how the person below me has suggested.

Answer 7

If she has won her district writing contest, it seems to me that you already know she has talent.

To be frank, it's very good for her age but I don't find it outstanding.  But that's my opinion.

Why ask if you think it's good? Not only do our opinions not matter, it smacks of you just wanting to boast about your child. You need to find another forum for that.

Answer 8

Her writing is VERY good.  So is her spelling and grammar.  Love it.

Answer 9

I find it slightly above average for her age, a  but after a few paragraphs I got rather bored of it, you should encourage her to write a better beginning that makes the reader want to read more.

Answer 10

It sounds pretty good to me, and I'm really picky. If she's this good at 12, I wouldn't be surprised if she got published someday. The grammar needs work, but that's what editors are for, right? I read a lot, and even some of the most renowned authors have grammar problems.

Her friends are just jealous, by the way. Who wouldn't be? There are very few people who can write something worth reading, and she's one of them.

Answer 11

It is very good. I also enjoy writing, and would like to give her some tips.

First, i like her first sentence!

Also, make sure you tie everything together better. The first paragraph seems very scattered to me.

She has a great vocab, but use the thesaurus!

Here is how I would have written the first paragraph:

         My life is not an ordinary one. At the young ate of six, my mother died. I was quickly adopted by an old woman by the name of Nickole Eckleston. This changed my name from Claire Doublon, to Claire Eckleston. Upon arrival, my new mother quickly cut off all but 8 inches of my gold, lucious hair that my late mother brushed and pulled back tenderly each morning. When it eveuntally grew back, it was nothing but a brown, stringy mess. As if that was not terrible enough, my new father, Michel Hates kids, and only uses me to serve him his snacks and sodas. It took time, but i have learned to live like this.

Hope you liked it, and i helped. she is a great writer, and will be very successful someday!