My daughter won't go to preschool. Help!?

Question

My daughter has done a year in a regular preschool. She found it boring because of too much free play and not much direction. So we switched her to a montessori school. Attended for half a year now, but she is again complaining it's boring, doing the same type of activities everyday. She enjoys art but there is not enough of that in both schools. Should i pull her out of the current montessori school and put her in a different school or have her stick with montessori until the end of the term?

Answer 1

I would homeschool her.  I think it's great that she has an interest she wans to pursue.  Besides, what is the point of her going to preschool if she is bored and not learning anything?  You can join a play group or take her to park days, library story times and other events for interaction.  I am homeschooling my daughter for preschool and I wish I would have done so for my son.

Here's some info if you're interested:

http://www.successful-homeschooling.com/...

Answer 2

This is her job - as her parent, she needs to know that this is where you want her to be.  A 4 (or 5) year old is not old enough to make these kinds of decisions.  Putting the ball in her court will be overwhelming to her and too much to ask.  Remember who the parent is!

Answer 3

Perhaps you can ask yourself what you are looking for in a school for your daughter.  Some children need more play, play is how they figure out things.  Other children are happy with the "work" they are given in school.  You know your daughter better than anyone else, I am sure you have picked a very good school for her but maybe something else is happening.  Did she stay at home with you before?  Where was she during the day before she went preschool?  She is trying to tell you something and sometimes children have a hard time putting feelings into words.  Maybe a Mommy Daughter day is needed.  I wish you the best

Answer 4

I am wondering does she want to see what you will do if she says she doesn't want to be at a school. Maybe something happened that she was not happy about and isn't sure how to express it other than she is bored.,

Answer 5

the Montessori method of learning is great. I would make her go. but what do I know? it's up to you.

please answer my questions:

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/;_ylc=...

and:

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Answer 6

unusual to hear that of a Montessori school; I'd have a sit down with the teacher - the whole point is to foster the child at their own pace!

you might want to look into what makes her "bored"; I'd touch base with the teacher and the director, and other parents as well. She's too young to be so 'bored'!

Answer 7

i would keep her in there and get extra art classes to stimulate her

Answer 8

One of the downsides of Montessori is that it does little to encourage creativity and imagination. If those are important to your child I'd try and find a better place for her. Spend a while sitting in a classroom and observing when you visit a possible place. Ask about the daily routine. By the way, free play shouldn't be boring if the adults understand that their role is to help kids extend their play, try new things, and learn from their experiences. it should not be a time to run wild and be left to yourself if you have difficulty.

Answer 9

You have a highly intelligent child.  If you follow others advice you will know if there is a legitimate problem which you can address.

This technique has worked for your child before where her boredom caused you to switch schools.  

I would find out what she can do to contribute to the school.  Bring snacks, an activity, books for the library, something.  The more she participates the more she will feel like it's her place and she belongs.

Can she read?  Do simple math?  Does she know the sounds of the alphabet?  Is she starting to write?

Answer 10

Children have many ways of communicating their needs, but fewer ways of understanding what they are. As adults, we are responsible for figuring out what it is that children are trying to communicate.

I would question that your daughter has the same definition of bored as you do. The best way to find out what is going on is to schedule a time to 1) observe her classroom and 2) have a conference with her teacher.

When you observe the classroom, I would stress that you will do better to observe the OTHER children as your daughter's behavior will not be typical with you there. Seeing the classroom will give you a good sense of what a regular day feels like. The teacher will then be able to flesh out what the day looks like for your daughter.

Sometimes children zero in with uncanny radar on what "gets" us riled. It may be that "being bored" is one of those hot buttons for you and your daughter is using this to garner additional concern and attention from you. Keep that in mind as you navigate these waters.

Now I would like to address your concern that Montessori doesn't have enough art. I cannot speak about your daughter's school, but nearly every Montessori classroom I have visited has a wealth of art materials that are carefully designed to promote children's artistic development.

But if you think your daughter needs more art, you can certainly provide her with extensive opportunities at home. In fact, all the Montessori teachers I know would recommend that you do that regardless of whether you think she is experiencing enough art at school. The home should provide a complement to the school environment and vice versa. The two environments should not be in competition or in great contrast since that would not be in the best interest of the child.

Answer 11

well maybe you could go spend a day at that preschool and see what there doing so the next preschool you pick can be better?

Answer 12

first ask her what she likes to do..  then go to her preschool suggest the ideas or see what shes enjoyin, so u can find a preschool that does some of those activities

Answer 13

Keep her in the montessori and talk to her teacher let her know that your daughter is complaining about being bored.  Explain to your daughter that it's  okay to be a little bored and to try different things she has to learn to stick things out and that she will not always be entertained this will help her throughout life

Answer 14

I always sigh as I read through other's answers.  You got some great answers, but I do want to make on comment on "EC Expert's" answer.  

"One of the downsides of Montessori is that it does little to encourage creativity and imagination. If those are important to your child I'd try and find a better place for her. "

That, as you probably know since you looked into Montessori, is just simply a false statement.  Research project after research project has been done that shows exactly how false that statement is, but (as we see) some of the "experts" just do not want to accept that fact.

Anyway, back to your question...

You never want to pull a child simply based off them saying they are bored with a school.  My thoughts on this:

"she is again complaining it's boring, doing the same type of activities everyday."

I would ask her why she keeps choosing those activities.  A lot of students are still learning that they may do other activities.  

At the same time, you will notice things happening in a classroom if you observe over a period of time.  There are moments when some students will be excited for a while then bored for a while.  That is not necessarily true of most students, but it is of some.  If you keep taking them out of school and putting them in a new school once they get bored, you are going to be spending a LOT of time running around.

Remember that "it's ok to by bored."  I hated it when my mom said that to me as a child, but it is very true.  Anytime she tells you she's bored, that should be your simple response.  Guess who's suddenly in charge of taking care of her boredom?  She is...not you.

Now the question remains whether this is a good school or not.  That's impossible for us to tell you.  However, watch this video, as it provides good insight into what you should see happening throughout most of the day in the Montessori classroom:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OM1Gu9KXV...

A little more information...the overall schedule of the day, if they have a 3 hour, uninterrupted work period, may first involve a short time where they all get settled into their work cycle.  Once they are in it, they will have a solid hour to hour and a half of a work period.  Then it will get unsettled for about 10-15 minutes and settle back down for the rest of the day.

What I'm really saying is learn about Montessori, then observe the classroom.  Many schools, but not all, do have a 1 way mirror to observe from, so you will get to see the classroom and daughter as it is without you in it.  If they do not have that, you still should be able to observe for the day.  

Realize that, no matter what school you go to, there will be an initial time of excitement.  As the honeymoon phase wears off, something else will begin to develop.  Your child may begin to truly enjoy what is happening, but it takes time.  Right now, from my perspective (and this is likely true at the other school as well), she is getting past the honeymoon phase.  You can't switch schools every 6 months because that would be unhealthy for all of you.

I'm not saying keep her here for the rest of her time, but don't switch yet unless you see something outside of boredom happening.

Answer 15

well go to the preschool and ask for more of what she needs like if she likes art ask for more time to do things involving drawing. It really doesn't matter where she goes as long as she gets the help she needs.