My daughters ear!?

Question

my daughter has an ear infection and we were at my grand mothers house for my cousins party. the other kids were swimming and of course my daughter wanted to go as well. I explained to her that if she went in the pool it was gonna make it worst because we havent seen her doctor yet. obviously her consiquence and reasoning skills are not present because she is only 5. I then had to be tough and plainly say no (she had been in the pool pretty much all week leading up to the infection) ! family (aunts and older girl cousins) and my mom got mad because they said i was mean and cruel for teasing her and not letting her swim. i explained to them that she had the infection and i havent seen her doc yet and told them unless ur coming over tonight when she is crying to stop encouraging her! at this point my older cousin told my daughter dont listen to ur mean ol mom and go my daughter gave me that look of haha and went into the pool. i comprimised with her (just so it wouldnt cause a scene) and

Answer 1

I'm confused.  Your 5-year-old daughter tattled on you to your mom (her grandma) and your mom yelled at you.  You don't cut ties with your family over something like this.  Just take your daughter to the doctors to make sure her ear is fine and get over it.

Edit:  I received your e-mail and I think you have completely misunderstood what I was saying.  I feel that family is more important then making a big issue about this one issue.  However, in your e-mail you gave more information that your family is always undermining you and your concern was your daughter being disrespectful.  I completely understand where you are coming from that you were being a good mother and not wanting your daughter's ear infection to get worse.  My daughter is 3 1/2 and also is "testing" me and I'm struggling with trying to find the best discipline for her because I too want her to learn to not be disrespectful.  The heading to your question was about the ear infection so I was saying that as long as your daughter's ear is okay, then to go on with your life.  I didn't focus in on all the other issues with your family.  I still wouldn't cut ties with family but I would stand my ground in the future and explain to all the family members that "I'm the mother and will do what's best for my children" and tell them to back off.  I guess you'll just have to get more voiceful with your family so they will respect you and not teach your daughter to disrespect you.  I hope this helps you, now.

Answer 2

I would state to my family that this is my daughter and as long as I'm her to tell her what to do then I make the decisions for her. I  would also make sure that my daughter understands what I say is what goes. I would also have a talk with my mom on this is my daughter and I love and respect you but what I choose to let my daughter do is my choice. When my cousin told her not to listen to her mean old mom I would say yep I'm a mean ol mom but you are not going swimming. First all does this cousin have kids I'm assuming not since she is stating things like this. I'm the one who is up with her in the middle of the night taking care of her and there to comfort her when she cries because it hurts and not them. Good Luck!!