My dear hubby would NOT wear deodorant...?

Question

Please note that this is not a question of "how do I tell someone politely that he needs to wear deodorant."

My hubby stinks, he knows he stinks, he knows that we (me and my girls) think he stinks. We tell him he stinks. He even have no problem telling his friend that I am not able to get him to wear it. He has many deodorant. I leave one by his dresser and one on the washroom sink. He has a trial size one in his toiletry bag. BUT HE WOULD NOT USE IT! Except going to job interviews or meeting someone important. Sometimes he stink so much that I sleep outside on the couch. Sometimes he wants to get intimate but I get dizzy from his scent and I have to refuse him. Even so he still woud not wear it. Any ideas? Don't say get a divorce I thought of that one already. Thanks!!!

Answer 1

I'm agreeing with the marriage counselor idea.  This is not just him smelling bad.  This is causing intimacy problems with you.  If a man creates an inhospitable environment in the bedroom or if a man continues to make an absolute mess of the home, we would understand if a woman would want to divorce him.  This is really not that different.  You may love him, but what exactly is he bringing to the relationship?

Do have a question for you though.  If you knew he smelled that bad, why did you marry him in the first place?

Answer 2

Tell him to shower twice a day. lf he wouldn't listen, take him to a doctor or a marriage counsellor. He might change his mind.

lf all else fail, post the divorce papers by the front door with the sign "not a threat". lf he doesn't react, well, he loves his stinkiness more than you.

lf you can't leave him, bear the smell. Love is unconditional.

Oh,well.

Answer 3

At bedtime, take a shower and invite him in with you.  Then you can "cuddle" with him.  

If he smells up the house and the bed linens, then he very well may have a medical problem.

Do you think he'd use some powder instead of deodorant?  Or I hear that baking soda works as a deodorant.  Maybe he does not like the sticky feeling of roll on 's.  

Would he wash  himself more often instead of using deodorant?

Answer 4

uhm...does he shower? a soap with deodorizers might help...or maybe a grooming professional...

Answer 5

Next time you take a c**p leave the used toilet paper on his pillow while he is sleeping.

Answer 6

Your situation is serious but girl I had to laugh because my son is the exact same way!  I walk into my house and it reeks of his stomach rolling arm pit odor.  Air freshener dissipates against the onslaught!  I tell him that he stinks and I tell him to put on deodorant  and he does...without even washing first so there is a combination of pit stink and deodorant.  Imagine that!   Honestly if a grown man is so selfish and inconsiderate as to funk up his living environment he should live alone.  He doesn't care about how you or your friends feel and that's why he doesn't change things to make it better.  It's a matter of control too.  He wants control of something in his life and his body odor gives him that sense of empowerment.  YOU and nobody else can do anything about it.

Answer 7

lol, buy one for him and put it in his toiletry bag, who knows he may be tempted to use it when he sees it, or

when u go out shopping together pick one up in front of him and say this one smells nice... but good luck and gotta tell ya u one brave gal lol.............

Answer 8

What is HIS excuse / explanation for not using deodorant??  Is it some repressed adolescent rebellion (maybe you are pressuring him too much)?   Ask him why as non-judgmentally as possible.

To simply reek is not normal.  Could this be a medical condition that he is too embarrassed to ask his doctor about?  If he has normal showering habits - he shouldn't be that smelly.  Or could this be the beginning of some mental problem??    You may have to contact his doctor for some advice.

Ablutophobia refers to the fear for bathing, washing or  cleaning. Ablutophobia can make a person feel dejected, be rejected by others and as a result feels isolated and lonely.

Answer 9

put some on him while hes sleeping lol or spray the arm pits of his shirts before he puts them on with something really strong

Answer 10

dang...nasty.  At least get him real strong body wash like Ax or Old Spice and spray the pits of his shirts with aerosol deodorant before he puts them on

Answer 11

Yea my bf is proud of the fact that he has never worn deodorant in his whole life hes 51 now  by the way.  i just now told him that I'm tired of washing all the bedding and he wont use deodorant or take a shower (unless I say go take a shower) and I want to sleep on nice smelling bed..so hes sleeping on the floor..LOL.