I'm a guy. Dated, been a bit of a bad boy, reformed, and now have some clarity on what I want. I'm lead by my emotions, but managed by my logic. I'm a bit a romantic, but down to earh.
To help me understand my feeling adn what was important for me i love i provided a framework in my mind for what is required, and what it wqould take to be my "one" I wanted to get the feelings of some of you guys...to structured, pretty accurate, other :)
BTW, If your expecting a warm and fuzzy answer, you'll be disapointed
Every person needs diffirent things from love, but I think my defintion could generally apply to many people
All these qualities are required for real love, and the 'one'
Safe- Feeling safe, having trust, and feeling secure, I can share anything with them. Even my most intimate fears/desires
Intimacy- Feeling safe, you naturally progress into intimacy. Being able to enjoy true intimacy with someone results in all kinds of perks and fun that make love great.
Communication- commincation is required to make any of the previous area happen. Being able to talk about anything is critical! Even stuff you might be scared to admit, afraid they judge you on. If they accept you after you face and share all that, why would you ever consider anyone else?
Honesty- This can be a dlicate balance when you are first getting to know each other, its possbile to share too much too early, but if they are the one and you love the, you have to be able to share anything
Laughter- a shared sense of humor is important and can make the difficult and challanging times better.
Commitment- I can't 'know' if someone else is commited but talking with them, learning about their past, even their previous relationships, and their actions with your relationship will tell you if their a good risk.
Chemistry- I disagree with the popular perception on what chemistry means to a relationship, but it is a factor. At first chemistry can be like a blazing light, but as relathip grows it becomes secondary to the rest of the qaulities.
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