My ex & I split after he cheated. I'm pregnant & live 1200 miles away. How will custody be determined?

Question

I have spoken to him once since I left (I made the call) during which he questioned paternity... (when he was the one cheating), threatened to take the child away from me.... (I am almost 7 months pregnant and he hasn't so much as lifted a finger to check on my or the child's health and welfare) and then mentioned he was going to take a lower paying job so he wouldn't have to pay child support. My demeanor was calm during the call and ultimately the coward hung up. Sadly, this was the man I was engaged to be married to. I thank God that my eyes were opened before I said I do. When he got caught the responsibilty to this child did not cease because he is embarrased, immature and self absorbed to assume any responsibility for the child he helped create. My first priority is my child and securing proper legal & financial assistance so that this child may be raised properly. Any suggestions on how I should go about getting custody and child support?

Answer 1

I feel your pain...You have nothing to worry about. The child is yours. Being a good mother and able to support the child is what will be looked at. Since the two of you are not married the judge will laugh at his arguements. Custody is yours, support from the father is something that will have to be done in the courts....you may have to get a lawyer.

Answer 2

You weren't married. Therefore, its almost impossble for him to get custody over you. Especially if he really is taking a pay cut, then he wouldn't be able to support the baby even if he DID get custody (which he won't :)

Answer 3

I don't think that you'll have any problem getting custody.  You may have to give him a month or so in the summer, it's not like he'll be able to see her every weekend.  Plus, contact your child support enforcement agency now.  They will let you know what needs to be done without you having to pay for a lawyer.

Answer 4

Your going to get custody. You have nothing to worry about. at this age they wont, split custody. That baby cant be away from the mother at this age.  I would totally go for full custody.

And to make sure you get what you want, I would totally be breastfeeding if possible.

This child seems like he or she is more safe with you than the father who is a cheater.

was this a husband or a boyfriend? If it was a husband file for spousal support too..... There is no judge going to let the father have custody.....exspecially if he was the cheater. I mean you have to be endangering the childs life. This is just the way the man scares a woman....I have had this done before the man saying that becuz they know that child means the world to you....

Trust me..the v****a always wins..ahahaha

GOOD LUCK and congrats on your wnderful blessing from GOD*baby*

Answer 5

Paternity will have to be established before support (obviously).  They will ask him to sign a paternity form and if he refuses, then he will have to submit a DNA test.  After paternity is established, then support will be ordered.  

You will have to petition the court for all of this though.  You can't file until the baby is born.  

My suggestion - speak to a lawyer, they can do phone consults for free.  Find out what laws your state has and then go from there.