My ex and feelings about it still after 5 months?

Question

I've been trying to cope after my ex left me for someone else...I've tried everything from prescribed medication, self medication..., alcohol, talking to everyone about it, forgetting and just reasoning out that this is just one part of my life.

I think I still love her (we were together for 3 years but were friends for 4...we were each others first for everything).

My best friend (Her brother as it happens) tells me that I'm being dumb and it's ridiculous that I'm still broken hearted after this long.

I really don't want to feel like this. I know it could be easier if I just convinced myself of hating her...but she was my best friend before this and I don't want to keep bad feelings towards her.

I've attempted suicide once by OD...I know it's stupid but this feeling doesn't end...I can't sleep, eat or enjoy anything...some days it doesn't hit me as hard but others like today...it's maddening.

I don't know what to do...I've exhausted everything I can think of. How did you guys cope with losing someone you loved?

I don't know what to do. Please help.

Answer 1

huny...dont do this to ur self  i knw it must be very toi\ugh for u...n hmm..wel all i can say i sthat u have to be stroong in this situtaion...u can just try too commite suside every time u rae heart broke...wellll u knw what no one els can help u in this sitution buyt ur self...n u love ur slef..i knw  u r hurting but be strong...n its not like its the end of this world rite....so get ur act together and keep ur self busy.....just throw away all the stuff that u have that reminds u of her...n plz...move on.....god bless u n take care!

Answer 2

We all know the feeling of a broken soul, and what

gets us the most are the memories and feelings we have left over

our previous relations.

Its very much true that time will heal us, but its how we deal with time

that will help us heal.

Its great you talk about this with many people, friends, family, and strangers, but a story like this can get very tiring to hear. About time and dealing with hard emotions like this, keep yourself occupied.

Do something you love over a period of time, accomplish it and feel

good about yourself. That goodness you feel about yourself, think deeply and recognize that that sense of happiness was entirely caused by you. And hopefully you know where I'm getting at, if not its OK. I'll explain more in detail.

We have heard that happiness comes within. Its true. No one can make us truly happy but ourselves. Ourselves are the most important things in our lives. We have to out ourselves first before others. Therefore, we cant keep mopping around and about because the person we love[d] left us. Although the happy memories you created were mostly with her, you have to let go, take it in and accept it.

Thats the very first thing we have to realize. We have to accept what happened and deal with it.

Dealing with emotions as strong as love, is very difficult. But something what I realized is that emotions such as love is a developed emotions.

I say that love is a developed emotions because it takes steps to get to that kind of emotion. For instance that phrase of "friends then lovers" are all developed.

The relationship you had with her was at first friendship, and that long termed friendship, both of you learned to trust one another, and that trust was enough to help you two to take another step. Another thing that helped, was that wonderful feeling you felt for her before she knew, it came from secrecy to finally letting her know about it. And from there  she may have told you about her feelings too, or maybe she also started having feelings for you. From there you two feel in love, were in the honey moon phase for quite some time and learned to love one another unconditionally.  A developed emotion.

Same as love, you have to learn how to move on.

And moving on is generally the same, in a general idea is to let go, and get going with life.

Are you the moving on type that cant live without her? If so, keep her still as your best friend, but be strong because as a best friend, she will talk to you about her current relationship. Put your friendship first, if your willing to keep her in your life.

Or are you the moving type that if she was in your life, you want her completely back? If so, your going to have to live life with out her completely. But this task will be difficult because her brother is also your best friend. And practically you are a family friend to her family, considering that you have been a part of their lives for quite some time.

Take your pick and first realize which moving on type are you and let me know, from there I can help you appoint to what is the next step you need to take in order for you to move on.

@ [e-mail]

Hopefully I have gave some sort of help to you.

Answer 3

you should start dating a lot of people  

Answer 4

Listen, do you think that you are the only person living that has gone through this? No. Alright then listen to how others here got over their ex.

Start hanging out with your friends more. Start dating other people right now. Spend more time with your hobby or find a hobby. Volunteer somewhere for a few hours. Talk to a good friend about your feelings. Go to a therapist and share your thoughts. Pick up a book and read. Get involved in a youth group or church group.

The idea here is that you need to occupy your mind. That's how everyone else deals with it. Suicide is just sooo Not the answer. Don't worry cause this too shall pass. Good luck.

Answer 5

It took me three years just to be able to date after a 12 year relationship.  I still think about him occasionally.  

Only time will heal your broken heart.  Just be active.  Try doing things with your friends, taking some classes, developing a hobby, anything that will keep your mind occupied.  Avoid being anywhere near her.

I am a religious person, so I turned to God for help also.  In time I was able to move on.