My family expects me to have a baby first

Question

I am the youngest of 3 and am in a healthy relationship. A year or so ago my sister broke it off with her fiance. My brother is currently single. I always hoped for nieces and nephews before I had a child of my own. I don't see them having kids any time soon. I'm not saying I'm gonna have a child any time soon, just that they think I'm more likely to have a kid before they do.It's a silly question to ask on yahoo but it kind of got to me when they said this. Is it wrong for me to feel this way? Am I being foolish?

Please no rude responses!

Answer 1

The next time someone in your family mentions you having kids simply respond with, 'One day when I am married and in a stable, loving home and feel that my husband and I can properly provide for a child then we will consider it.  Right now is far too early for this.'

You are letting them know that you are not emotionally, physically or financially ready and any parent would applaud you for waiting until the time you are.  Children are not toys that should be popped out for mere enjoyment.  They require love, money and lots of care.  

Don't worry about what your siblings do.  Concentrate on you and don't let anyone dictate your ovaries.

Good luck!

Answer 2

No, what you do is up to you and not up to anyone else. dont bring a child into the world because everyone thinks you should. good luck.

Answer 3

What is this, a race or a contest? Sounds pretty stupid to me, one, it is none of your family's business when you decide to have a child and two, this is not a contest.

Answer 4

It's not really clear to me how you feel.  Your family may expect you to have a child before your elder sister simply because your sister has broken off her relationship.

The same applies to your brother who is not yet in a relationship.

What I am not clear about is are you being pressurised into having a child by your family?  If you feel you are then don't let them pressurise you.

I'm not clear because you say "they think I'm more likely......."

Only you can decide when the time is right as children are very expensive to bring into the world and are a life-long commitment - financially for 16+ years and emotionally for a long time thereafter.

In my view and this is only my opinion I think children should only be considered when the couple have a firm, strong and solid relationship (preferably in marriage), although couples do successfully raise children otside marriage, so the ensuing children will have stability and the benefit of two parents throughout their growing years.  

Although you may have hoped for nieces and nephews before you have children circumstances may dictate otherwise.

I hope I have answered your question and possibly the one you didn't ask.

Answer 5

No, you are not wrong to feel this way. I am 28 years old and I don't have any children. That bothers me sometimes because look at me and think that I should have children by now. There is no rule that says you have to have children at a young age. I want to get my career going, finish school and be prepared for a child. Just take your time and things will happen when they are supposed to happen.  

Answer 6

before having children you must be in a permanent relationship {marriage}  

Answer 7

You are so right to feel that way! You are not being foolish..but very wise. Tell them they are not in charge of planning your life!

  Good Luck :-)