My fiance hit me..what should I do?

Question

It all started with a fight today. I got mad at him bc he didnt drop me off to get my alignment..I went by myself but I had to sit outside in the heat for 2 hrs. I called him to remind him but he yelled at me like I was bothering him. After that he never even called back and check on me. I came home from work but he just sat there didnt say a word didnt say why or even gave me a reason. So I just went off on him..

He threw a pillow at my face then...he slapped in the face.

We were planning to get married next summer. But now, i changed my mind. I just realize what kind of relationship i'm in and what kind of future it holds. His mom said it was my fault for yelling at him and that I dont understand him. IS IT? I want to leave...but should I?

Answer 1

If he hit you before marriage, you can bet he will do it after marriage.

You deserve better.  Break up with him.  His mother is an idiot and if you marry him, you might have children.  Do you want this for your children?

Answer 2

It's not your fault.  Unless you are defending yourself there's no reason to hit anybody.  Second, men should never hit women, for any reason, ever.  It sounds like he's not a very nice guy.  If he hit you once he'll probably do it again.  I'd say leave him now before you get hurt even more.

Answer 3

WHOA!  STOP!  Call it off!  Stop and think.

The only time I EVER hit a girlfriend is when she was drunk, belligerent, and she stuck a knife in me.  If she was man enough to use a knife, she was man enough to take a beating.

She had anger issues.  The same type of anger issues your BF has.  Words are abusive and should not be used as a weapon.  However, a response from someone would be of the same level or lower.  If you were punching, hitting, and kicking him, then I would see where he would throw a pillow to get your attention.  And then tell you to either quit it or be prepared to meet equal treatment.

His Mom is a beotch if she thinks it is your fault.  I am a guy, I am an emotional guy, but I am not a violent guy to my loved ones.  He wanted to establish his dominance, and make sure you were put in your place.  

But I am curious, why didn't he want to go drop you off to get your alignment?  Could he have done something different?  Could you have done something different?

Either way, the situation escalated.  You have four different inter-related situations:  The not dropping you off, your reaction, his ambivalence, and his hitting you.  Treat each as a separate issue and deal with them now while you still can.

Answer 4

wow! the mom is wrong! no its not really your fault. no man has no right putting his hands on you! if you really love him you need to let him cool off and later on sit him down n tell him that him putting his hands on you really hurt your feelings and made you start to wonder about yall relationship. see what he has to say about it then if its positive give him another chance [your choice] but if he starts yelling again theres your answer. if he cant sit down and talk about yalls p[roblems. then what make you think you guys can plan a life together..

Answer 5

Dump his stupid ***, and then report him.

He does NOT hit a woman. EVER!

That is illegal, and he can go to jail for years.

It isn't your fault. He's the one with the issues.

You'll be much better off if you leave him.

Good luck =)

Answer 6

NO its is not your fault and even if it was he had no right to hit you !!!

Answer 7

Girl repeate after me " You are a strong women and you deserve much more than this" Never ever let a man put his hands on you!  It starts with a slap or a bruise on the arm 5 years into your marriage you'll be hiding black eyes behind designer glasses.  It was not your fault a fight is a fight until he took it to far by hitting you.  Don't think twice what abotu childrendo you feel comfertable leaving him with your babies in the future?  What if one of your babies makes him mad? Can you live with your self if he hites one of your children?

Answer 8

No,, it is absolutely not your fault. A man SHOULD NEVER hit a woman! PERIOD!

Answer 9

leave his sorry a**. he doesn't deserve you. just think what happens when you two get married it will be worse. He will assume your his property. it doesn't matter if you started it he had NO rite what so ever to lay a finger on you. you can see I'm a little upset. I'm just tired of hearing about these types of situations. My mom was a victim of domestic violence for 4 or 5 years. i was only 5 and 6 at the time and i still have nite mares of my mom hitting the floor. (now I'm 14). Leave him and dont look back. IF YOU FORGIVE HIM ONCE,HE THINKS YOU WILL FORGIVE HIM TWICE.  if you forgive him, make it very clear that it better not EVER happen again. let him know your serious and you will leave if he hits you again.

good luck, hope i helped

(sorry about my mini rant)

Answer 10

dont listen to his mom.. she is just makin excuses for him...it was not your fault it doesnt matter how much you yell no guy has the right to hit a girl ever.. leave him and dont look back..

Answer 11

I'm not some "man hater" ... I'm a GUY ... and even I say...

DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP DUMP

Answer 12

Hun...put it off. You are getting an early sample of the real him. If you allow this to continue...it might get worse. You just should let him know that you are putting it off. Consider giving the ring back to let him know you mean business. As long as you keep the ring you are letting him know that you are still his. Good luck! Maybe once he realises what he is losing, he may correct his behavior. Be clear now! Take care

Answer 13

Can you imgaine what it would be like if you have kids with him?..

You'd be in his life forever...

and he 'd be the typical wife beater..

and the kids would grow in an abusive home..

if you get that far..

it might be he sends you to the ER or worse..

before then..

think about it!

He's mother is probably only backing him up because she probably grew up around this type of behavior and was disciplined to tolerate and be submissive to it..

but things have changed..

don't follow morons who know better but they they'll changed..

because in the end..people never really change unless they want to, which would have to be a huge reinforcement.

Answer 14

I would tell u to work things out by talking it out...

i would tell u that like with all couples, one has a story different than the other.....

And i would like to hear his side of the story before judging either one of you...

But he did hit u, you say. I have never hit a woman and to this day dont understand y any man would....yes women go crazy sometimes, but hitting a woman is never a choice.

So i wont give u a final answer, i would want to know his side of the story....but he did hit u and no matter what, he f***** up there.