My fiancee wants too....

Question

so i have an 8 month old daughter whos dad is well worthless honestly, never helps with anything and comes around maybe once a month but only when i give him gas money, well im engaged to this wonderful guy who is in iraq serving for us right now, he wants to adopt my daughter when he comes home, do u think it would be a battle worth fightin her father over?

Answer 1

If he is more of a father why not? When your daughter is old enough tell her the truth of the matter as well.  

Answer 2

Yes it would because i go through the same thing my mom is on drugs so i live in with my foster parents im 13 and my dad never comes to visit. i dont get b-day presents or any thing. if you want to know more of my story then email me or if this helps email me.

Answer 3

i do not believe in taking away someone's parental rights unless there is abuse like physical or sexual towards the child,so many times other men adopt another man's child and it back fires either the child grow up and resent your husband or if you get a divorce he regrets it etc, and it seems kind of quick to be making such a move ,i mean the kid is just 8 months old why the hurry ,give it more time and space between the break up and jumping into another relationship,why the rush ,so much confusion and mood swings can occur after a child birth  slow down and think this through,if this other man loves you and want to marry you he can and still father the child after all it is your child ,but to deny the biological father the rights to his kid is not really right just because he can not afford  to support the kid ,it is like in family court if a man does not pay child support he still have legal access as the court put it support and access are two separate issue

    Did not you know he was worthless when you were sleeping with him? and the court will not take away his parental rights just because he does not pay or support the kid ,if he contest it he will most likely win without any abuse or child endangerment issues ,i know this as a fact,so get married and if the other man loves you he will accept you and child as is  

Answer 4

Yes - If he needs money from you for gas, then he probably cannot afford a lawyer to fight it anyway.

Answer 5

umm yes! he is willing to marry you and adopt your daughter! hello! I would definitly fight that battle..you got yourself a good one

Answer 6

YES YES YES!!!! he had a chance to be a father and he obviously sucks at it.  If its true that hes not around and he doesnt pay for anything then it will be really easy in the courts.  This is one worth the fight so please do it for your daughter

Answer 7

absolutely.

if you don't think that the real father does anything for her then you should let him adopt her.

if your fiancee loves your daughter enough to want to then do it.

and if your daughter likes him.

there won't be anymore child support battles if the real father doesn't pay and no more stress from him in the long run.

the only thing is your daughter might ask later on in life to meet him if she doesn't keep in touch.

good luck.

Answer 8

Absolutely.

It's worth trying if the biological dad doesn't really want part of your daughter's life... if he just wants to "get even" and "win", it might be something of a battle... but do what is best for your daughter.

Answer 9

Wait until after you're married to let him adopt her.

Answer 10

Yes it especially if the dad isn't contributing to her life. Your fiancee is her father because he is raising her so fight for your daughter to have a better life!

Answer 11

yea, either she grows up with a good dad, or a bad dad, it makes all the difference in the world..

shell barely remember her true dad at this age, so i would try to have her grow up with a responsible man

Answer 12

Well he is still your daugher 's father but if he does want to help may be  he needs consulling and also yu stop give him staff otherwise he will never   grow. wish yu luck

Answer 13

yes!!!



the other guy does nothing for you but yet your fiancee is in iraq and will never be around also....... but you love him and he loves you so just go for it.

Answer 14

IF your paying for his gas to see HIS daughter, then obviously he's NOT paying child support. Time to take him to court for child support. I would get a lawyer, and find out what your options are.

good luck to you. :)  

Answer 15

Well, I believe that everyone deserves a father. And if that father is completely worthless and never there- that's completely devastatingly sad. I say, if your daughter has the opportunity to have a sincere and dedicated father, i think that is absolutely wonderful.

The one thing that i worry about is down-playing her real father in front of her, you know, when she's older. now, THATS unfair. She's got the right to develop a relationship with both men, especially since one is biological.

Go for it. Do what your heart tells you to. I think that there is a wonderful opportunity for your little princess.

Answer 16

If you love this man and he is willing to take better care of your daughter other the her dad i say go for it.  

Answer 17

nah...

it sounds like WORTHLESS Dude... can't be bothered with his daughter.  He will likely RELISH the break - with responsibility.

My question is...

If your DAUGHTER is only 8 months old, that means that you had s*x with your ex as recently as 17 months ago.  SHOULD you be entering into a NEW REALTIONSHIP so soon?

All the experts say:  NO.

Answer 18

Your Ex Doesnt Care About Your Child By What You Have Said. He Cant Even Pay To Come Down And See Her!

You Have This Amazing Man Whos Being A Hero For Our Country.

Im Amazed You Havent Let Him Adopt Your Child Already.

The Only Question You Need To Ask Yourself If Which Man Do You Want Being A Role Model And A Father To Your Child?

Go For It!

I Hope Everything Works Out

Good Luck!

Answer 19

This has to be a very personal decision for you... but I think if I were you I would ask the father but I would not wage a war over it.  If he was unwilling to give up his paternal rights I would accept that.  You daughter would then have a father and you new husband could be her Daddy.  Daddy's are the ones who sit up with you when your sick, listen when you cry about that mean boy and are just generally there for you.

Answer 20

yes probably. U might wanna talk things through with your fiancee tho about whether or not biological dad can still see your daughter so u two know exactly whats going on with each other. n then ask him!? good luck

Answer 21

yes, your daughter is still very young and her father doesn't seem to care very much about her. i think it is a battle worth fighting for, your daughter deserves a father who cares for her. in court these are some battles you can bring up. he doesn't visit the child, he doesn't seem to be paying child support, and who was there during the birthing process your fiance or the child's father if it was your fiance you can bring up that the father of your child hasn't shown and care in his daughter and that your daughter deserves a father who really truly cares for her. i hope that you get your you get your daughter a nice father.

Answer 22

If your fiance is her 'daddy' and her bio-dad makes no effort to see her, spend time with her in other words be a daddy, then yes.....after you & your guy are married, go for it.

and STOP giving bio-dad gas money...what is that, a bribe to see his daughter?????? yikes! You don't owe him any money...he wants to see the bay, he pays for his own transportation......jeeze.....

Answer 23

Ultimately you're the only one who can make the decision. If the father of your child is someone who doesn't take responsibility for her, then it won't be hard to keep that up in court (at least i don't think so if its blatant) plus you'll have a father figure for her who will be there to take his place. You're the one who has been taking care of her all along, only you can make the decision that is right for her.

Hope this works out for the best.

Answer 24

Hello Sweetie,

I think you already know the answer in your heart. It would be a battle over whats best for your child. The father had already made a decision as what kind of parent he wants to be, so you make the right for your daughter. Marry that solider and give her a real father!!!!

Answer 25

As long as your ex will give up custody of your child then yes I think its worth it. The child deserved a father who actually wants to be there for her.

Answer 26

you serious need our advice? OF course its worth it your daughter deserves the best you can give her and if this guy, who is serving our country, wants to take on the responsiblility of being there and a role model then yes! i would defiantly let him cause you and your daughter deserve someone to take care of you both not a typical looser

Answer 27

Is the dad willing to give up his parental rights?  Because that's essentially what he would have to do.  Talk to him about it; since he doesn't seem to be paying child support and should be, he's not really supporting his child anyway.

Answer 28

If you say your daughter's father is worthless, then YES it's worth fighting for custody.  She deserves a good father and your fiance sounds like a much better one for her.  Blood relations don't mean a thing if the father doesn't act like one.....your fiance deserves to be the father if he truly acts the part.

PS....who the f*ck is going around giving everyone thumbs down?  Real mature, a******s.

Answer 29

If you do it for your daughter, yes. If you do it for your fiance or for you, no.

Answer 30

Probly, no father would just give up there daughter like that. Enless his literally a POS., explain him the reasons, and talk to him about it rather than throwing up law suits.

Answer 31

NO... she has a father and though he may not act like one right now...

I think that's something your daughter can decide for herself when she is older.