My first free verse poem. What do you think?

Question

Honest response especially about display of poem. as i do not know how to lay out, free verse poems. and your view of poem itself. Thx

Tittle: Summer Disco By Tia Metcher

White

Feathered,

Cotton ball,

Softly,

Ballet,

Across sleek

Blue dance floor,

Ocean brine sweeps,

Along golden tiled shore,

(Whoosh, Swish, whoosh)

Dance the tango twist,

Oceans current,

Tambourine,

Is the music Re-mix? Theme,

Twittering twitter,

Choir birds sing,

Orchestrated by, whistling winds.

Twittering twitter birds,

Summer song sung,

Thunder and lightning,

Drum beats roll,

(Boom, Crack a de Boom), (Boom, Crack a de Boom),

As lightning displays,

The disco light show,

The highlights of -

The Summer Disco.

Answer 1

lovely! a really nice poem!

x

:)

Answer 2

I LOVE IT!!!! =D When I read it I felt I was inside it imagining the cotton ball going down

                                     down

                                        down

I wish I couls write a free verse like you but I suck at it!!! =[

Answer 3

I give you ten snaps girl

Answer 4

boooooorrrrrrriiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnggggg...

Answer 5

very nice,,

sounds familiar though..

Answer 6

its sound nice.

Answer 7

WOW!

u got some cool stuff there!!!

I can REALY imagine thaat!

I would really like to be able to write something like that!!!

Answer 8

I think your poem is truly breathtaking, you create a painting in your reader`s head. Keep up the good work!