My firstborn is driving me crazy!!?

Question

I have two sons--one is three years old and the other is one month old. So far, my older son has adapted very nicely to having a younger brother. He gives him kisses, helps fetch things for the new baby, and is always talking to him. He also tells everyone he is a big brother and seems very proud.

However, he is driving ME up the wall! Maybe it's because he hasn't been to daycare in a month (where he gets to see his friends). He isn't being BAD per se....but he has been doing things like drinking out of the baby's bottle, taking his pacifier and sucking on it, wanting to sleep in the crib etc etc. He will want to act like a "big boy" in some circumstances...but he is confusing me with wanting a bottle...he hasn't had one in two years!!!

Plus, when he is playing with the baby he tends to be a bit rough. I try to nicely tell him to play "softly" with the baby, but I am afraid he will hurt him by accident!

What do I do? This is all new to me :)

Thanks!

Answer 1

I had my 2nd child last year when my son was 3 and I just had my 3rd child. I know what you are going through. I just had to tell my son that he was a big boy and that he had to be responsible. I know he didn't understand that then but now 1 year later he understands. Now he tells his one year old little sis what she can and cant do with theie baby bro. Good Luck!

Answer 2

Well it sounds like your boy is jealous. He may not act out like some children do, but by wanting to do what the baby does, he is showing that he needs a bit more attention. He is probably associating the babies crib, soothers, bottles etc with the amount of attention the baby gets. I guess in little boy logic if he has a soother he will get the attention that they baby gets.. I'm sure he loves his little baby brother so much, but secretly I'm sure he's jealous. Try spending a little bit of time with him each day. Even if it's just 15 minutes of alone time between you two. It will show him that you still love him very much. Get him to draw you pictures of your family and point him out in the pictures. Snuggle up with him on the sofa or on the floor when your feeding the baby, that way he knows that even if his baby brother is getting attention, you are still thinking about him. It's very easy for a little guy to feel left out. Just be happy that he isn't acting out! Good luck!!

Answer 3

Maybe even having like 1 or 2 days that he could go to daycare a week would help both YOU and HIM!! He also sounds jealous so maybe if you could find a little time to just spend with him and focus mainly on him (even though I know it's next to impossible right now). It is just a phase and it will pass, hang in there!!!

Answer 4

this sound like it the jealous side coming out try to have a bit of time set aside for him as this is new to him as well hopefuly he will calm down  

Answer 5

the exact same thing happened to my boyfriends mam when he was born, his older brother was doing all of the things your firstborn is doing, he even wanted to be breast fed again! i dont know how she worked it all out, but im sure its just a phase and will pass soon  

Answer 6

Your son is just feeling left out. Take some time out of your day to just play with him. Like while the baby is sleeping. He might not act as "bad" then. : )

Answer 7

Maybe sometimes he gets jealous of the younger babies attention and wants to experience it? I don't know if you are already doing something like this, but would it be possible to get something that only big boys can have- a trike or a big boy bed?

Good luck!