My four year old will not p**p in the potty...any suggestions?

Question

I would say, out of ten times, he will go in the toilet probably four. I need help. please. i do not yell at him or spank him, i do get down on my knees and look him in the eyes to talk to him. he does get punished time-out for four minutes. when i stay and watch him, he does great, but when i let him and brother play alone he goes in his pants. i check on them frequently but once i leave he goes. i ask him to go sit on the pot and he say i dont need to go.HELP me please.......

Answer 1

Read the book Everyone Poops by Taro Gomi to your child. It's a great children's book.

Answer 2

All I can suggest is to figure out the signs right before he goes and then quickly move him to the toilet.  After he goes give a LOT of praise and a sticker to put on a chart.  After so many stickers take him to McDonald's for an ice cream cone, or give him a few M&M's, or let him watch a movie, something.  Also, is he still in a diaper?  If he is move him into big boy underwear.  He won't like the feeling so he'll be more inclined to go in the toilet.  I wouldn't recommend the time out if he goes in his pants.  I'm not sure if this would work, but have him clean out his underwear-supervised or it could get REAL MESSY.  Overall, have patience and praise him a lot.

Answer 3

I would say try to give him something to look forward to when he does use the toilet.  Maybe some kind of reward.

My mother in law suggests when a child does not use the toilet and they know when to use the toilet and don't, make them clean it up themselves.  She said that they will not want to do this, so they will stop.  She says to put them in the tub and let them clean.

Answer 4

If he will go when you stay to watch him, stay and watch him.  If you know it is time for a p**p, pick him up, put him in the bathroom, and say gently but firmly "it is time to p**p."  

Kids get so involved in what they are doing that they do not pay attention to when it is time to go, or they ignore it.  He needs to have you pause his world for a minute, and then go back to it when he is finished.    Let him have choices in other areas of his life, but he is not ready to have a choice in this.  Praise him to no end when he does the deed, and when he does it by himself with no reminder, praise him all the more.  Do not make this a negative thing.  Do not punish him, that will only set him back.  It should never be a fight.  My son is 6 and still needs to have his world stop when it is time to go.

Answer 5

When he goes on his potty with you, you have to celebrate it....

which will encourage him to do so alone...

and when he does do it alone make a big deal about it -

Does he have a little drum? If so make up a little really basic song like ''Joseph went in the poopy pop hip hip horrah!" and let him bang his drum marching around the house. That's what my mom did with my brother and it worked great. He was out of diapers before he was 3.

- I recall that my mom made me feel so proud that just to please her I actually ended up wanting to clean the potty too!!!