My friend's shoulder issues and swimming?

Question

well, my friend and i are on a swim team together. She has shoulder problems and it seems she's been using them to get out of practices. During the summer, practices are optional, so we usually only go 3 or 4 times a week instead of all 5 days. All summer it seems she's been saying her shoulders hurt during really hard sets and i think she might be faking it to get out of it. i mean, there might be a little bit, but she hasn't been doing her physical therapy or taking her meds, so she's asking for it and now she's trying to get out of practice. next week our school's team starts and its 5 hours a day and we absolutely cannot miss practice. i'm afraid she might not be able to do it, but i don't want to bug her about her shoulders any more because i know she's getting annoyed with me telling her to do her PT and stuff. Do you guys have any ideas to first of all, get her to stop complaining or to get her to take her meds and do her PT?

Answer 1

It's nice of you to be concerned, but this is something she has to deal with. She could have used the summer to get on top of her injury, and it sounds like she squandered the opportunity. Stifle the urge to say, "I told you so" after fall swim season starts.

Ask her if there's anything you can do to support her effort to get better. If she says there's nothing you can do, let it go and start focusing on your own swimming.

p.s. Don't put pressure on her ("You're letting the team down"). Having grappled with shoulder injuries myself, that's the last thing I'd want to hear.

Answer 2

Though life would often be easier, you can't "get" anyone to do anything. People will do what they want to do, despite the fact that it may harm them. You can try voicing your concerns so she can see the benefit. Something like "I'm just asking about your PT because I'm afraid when we start swimming at school your shoulder might hurt more."

Don't mention things like her using it to get out of sets. If that's true, she knows it's wrong. However, people also have amazing skills when it comes to justifying any action. Humans can explain away just about everything they do. The point I'm trying to make is telling her you're aware of what she's doing won't help and will make her angrier.

You can try the same kind of tactic again (though she'll probably still get angry) and say something like "You know, I'm glad we have the opportunity to do these sets this summer. We'll be that much faster when swimming at school starts."

Try not to pass judgement on her. Having an injury as an athlete is difficult. There could be many reasons and ways she's rationalizing not training properly and not doing her PT (or taking meds). Pointing out that she's wrong won't help. She'll probably get what's coming to her when you start swimming faster and she doesn't.

Answer 3

Your friend's times are really gonna show that she hasn't been training.  Stop mentioning it too her, its just getting on her nerves and she doesn't want to hear it.  The best way to deal with a borderline personality type is to say when they complain, so what are you going to do about it?  That shuts them up.

Answer 4

Tell her that you and your team really need her to swim well at practice and meets maybe she'll think about letting you down and your team