My girlfriend of 7 months made out with some guy in vegas and I dumped her. Am I overreacting? ?

Question

So here's what happened:

She goes to vegas with her girlfriends and gets drunk at a club and makes out with this dude. I found out about it from one of her friends friend...

I confronted her about it and she denied it. Then I told her it wasn't a big deal and that I had made out with a girl while I was drunk too. She was furious, but then calmed down and admitted to it.

I ofcourse was lying, never cheated on her, nor had I ever put myself in that situation. I told her the truth and ended it.

She started crying and I left and went home... She's left several voicemails and text msgs telling me she truly loves me and she didn't mean to do it and it was outta her control and alcohol blahblah.

I told her if she loved me she wouldn't have done it.

The thing is, I know she does love me... Maybe the truth here is that even though i've been faithful, maybe I wasn't in love with her. That might be the reason I'm not willing to forgive her.

What do you all think? If two people are in love can they get past this?should I try to work it out?

Answer 1

It depends.  She cheated, lied, then tried to blame it on alcohol.  And it's only been 7 months.  Is that good enough for you?  I agree that if she loved you, she wouldn't have gotten drunk and forgotten she was meant to be loyal to you.

Cut your losses.  Find someone who will be loyal to you no matter what.

Answer 2

u did the right thing by dumping her cuz if u didnt then that would make her think that it would be okay if she did it again. and it was bad cuz u had to hear it from one of her friends friend! if she keeps calling u alot then u should take her back. but the realtionship will be so different and no u obviously dont love her cuz ur asking urself if u love her. if u loved her u wouldnt even have to think about it. but if u really like the girl then yes work it out.

Answer 3

Well, what happens in Vegas didn't stay this time. No, you need to stick to your guns on this one. If you invest more into the relationship then something else will happen and you'll have more at stake. There are plenty of fish, man. Get one that isn't a kissing fish!  

Answer 4

Give her the royal dump.  Of course she is sorry she got caught.  Maybe she has learned to be true to the next guy in her life.  But for you and her?  Forget it.  YOU WILL JUST BE TEACHING HER SHE CAN DO ANYTHING AND YOU WILL JUST LAY DOWN AND SHE WILL WALK ON YOU.  Man, forget her.  Forget her.  Kindest regards, Happy

Answer 5

Obviously, she can't be trusted.  You made the right move.  Stick to your decision and move on.  There is someone more trustworthy out there for you.  Good luck!

Answer 6

In my own opinion, no two people in love can not get past this.

Just thank goodness you both were not married and had children.

She was not crying when she cheated on you.

She did not mean to do it, the alcohol, etc etc.  That is no excuse.

You are young and will find someone else, that does not cheat on you.

Sorry, she made her bed, now she has to live with it.  without you.

I am sure you were hurt and angry.

Sorry for what she put you through.

Answer 7

"If two people are in love can they get past this?"

In my opinion it depends on the two people.  Is it possible?  Yes.  Is it hard?  Yes.  Do BOTH people have to be willing to put in the effort?  Yes.

"Should I try to work it out?"

In this case, I think you've made the correct decision.  There are a couple of factors that concern me.  The first is that when you confronted her she initially denied it.  It's the first instinct of a child to lie to protect themselves when confronted by a parent, but it shouldn't be the first instinct of an adult in an open and honest relationship.  The second thing that concerns me is the fact that she attempted to justify her actions.  They are not justifiable.  Alcohol or no alcohol.  The third factor is that she allows herself to become so inebriated that she is unable to control herself.  Whether this was simply an excuse, or an actual problem that she has, it's something that needs to be considered.

Love is more than a feeling.  Lifetime love is about choices.  She made the wrong one.  You've made the correct one.

Answer 8

If two people are in love they can get past almost anything.  Your remark about maybe you aren't in love with her is the thing you should think about.  I doubt you will forgive her.  It would be very hard for me to forgive someone for hooking up with someone else..alcohol or not.  I feel if someone really loves another, they don't do what she did.  I wouldn't try to work it out.  I don't think I would waste my time trying unless you are absolutely sure you love her enough to forgive her.  Otherwise,  you'll look back and realize you could have been spending your time with someone you could love and trust instead of trying to regain the trust you once had for her.  I suppose in the end, it's your call.

Answer 9

cut your losses and move on bud

Answer 10

i couldn't get past it.  The booze is no excuse for letting some stranger makeout with her.  That is a copout.  Maybe you didn't love her and thats why you aren't willing to give her another chance, it doesn't matter because whether you did or didn't is moot now seeing how she was making out with another guy.

Answer 11

OK, so she gets liquored up and hangs out in clubs and violates the trust. And so you are supposed to trust her from now on? A. She can't or won't control her drinking.  B. If she's drunk she's going to want to hit on men. Can you live with this?  She sounds immature and self-centered. I say there are better women out there.  

Answer 12

If you can't forgive her there's nothing left to do. There's no point in being with someone who you can't trust or forgive. Move on, it doesn't seem like you're really in love if you can't seem to forgive her and don't want to.

Answer 13

h**l NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   But you know what you are doing now........ OVERACTING... Stop thinking about that, get over it,  You will find someone much better, if you stop thinking about her, cut her off...

Answer 14

fuq her!

Answer 15

You're not over reacting. I would have ended things as well. Be true to your heart and don't tolerate a cheater and a liar. She feels like c**p about it, I am sure. She will have to live with that all her life, but you don't have to. Move on and next time your girlfriend goes on vacation with her girlfriends, be clear with her that cheating will not be tolerated or excused by her drinking alcohol. And her friends shoulda stepped in and got her under control if they knew she was about to do something she may regret.  

Answer 16

She blew it, really. She is not to be trusted at all. She cheated, and has no self control, is probably an alcoholic, does not have to drink daily to qualify, incidentally, and lied to you.

Lots of other good ones around...who do not get drunk, incidentally.

Answer 17

If you really don't see her as the cheating type, and it was only a one-time deal, I wouldn't worry about it. It's not like she took him to bed, that would be much worse. If you don't see a future with her, I would move on, but making out while drunk one time is not too condemning, especially if you know she loves you. Depends on what you see as your future.