My husband's brother just got out of prison and why should we help?

Question

My brother-in-law just got out of prison in CT so he moved to Atlanta this past weekend. He isn't living with us(stays at his uncle's house) but my husband picks him up everyday to take him to work hence there is public transportation. When I ask my husband questions about how long will this last, he says that I am selfish and why i want to know. Now this is my truck and he drops me off every morning.

Answer 1

Just consider your self lucky that he is not living with you and that he has found a job so soon after getting out of prison. This my sound corny but "A brothers love is a brothers love!"

Answer 2

well that IS his brother, i guess the bond with his brother is what that makes him do this kind of stuff. You mean you are not going to help your family members when they are in trouble? You might think it's normal not to care about family members after you married but normally a lot of people will think it is selfish.

Answer 3

If family does not help him who do you think will?  Just because he was in prison it does not mean he was or is a bad person.  It only means that he did something stupid and got caught up in the system. The system wants him to fail, why would you?

It is "your" truck.. what does that mean?  If it was your husband's truck it would be ok?  Is everything divided in your house mine and yours?

Please help your brother in law and just be happy it is not your husband.

Answer 4

Not everyone who gets out of prison is a deadbeat. Some truly want to create a better life for themselves. Unfortunately, getting out of prison and making a better life for yourself isn't easy. If this guy is working a job and trying, then it seems perfectly reasonable that his family wants to help him and they should. Try to be patient and support your husband while he supports his family.

Answer 5

WOW, the guy gets out of prison and tries to make his life right by getting a job and his brother picks him up and takes him to work to HELP him get on with his life and you complain.....perhaps we all just should put people in jail for the rest of their life and consider them to be lost cause that can not be rehabilitated.

Show some compassion. Give the guy a chance to get going again. Change doesn't happen overnight. The love your husband is showing for his brother is great.

I hope he succeeds.

Answer 6

I believe you have equal say in this matter and your husband's brother should take the bus. His problem isn't yours and any thing that occurs because of your brother-in-law could come back to bite you. Let the risks fall on the ex con. Your brother is enabling him to consider more help than you can provide. Inconvenience so far could last a long time due to your husband. Tell your husband to inform his brother to take his own rides with public transportation....

Answer 7

i think your husband is trying to give him a fresh start. it is not like you are giving him money just a ride to work. get over it you are helping someone out and i am sure it is only till he gets his own car  

Answer 8

maybe ur a bit jealous even though i feel u on the free rides! no-no! id be pissed! but id have my hubby give me a deadline b/c though he is a jailbird he will still need help! i got a cousin that did 8 years and got out n had a job in 3 weeks!  its been 6 months n he has a car. now hubby gonna spoil him n he'll be too good for the bus n be mad when u dont wanna give a ride!!! yep i agree with u u should put a astop to this soon. after a few months if he's not on his feet let the uncle babysit!......

Answer 9

Give his brother a chance. If you was down and out you would want someone to help you. Picture yourself getting layed off and you needed work but no transportation ran your way and your best friend lives like 4 doors down and you ask her if you can ride with her so you can look for work and she always tell you no. Or get your own car. You would be pissed like why am I even friends with them. If I was your brother I would help him get on his feet. Remember what goes around comes around. It is in genesis in the bible.  

Answer 10

maybe your husband feels his brother needs another chance. yes he made a mistake with whatever crime he commited but he wants to get his life backtogether.

your husband is just providing him a ride-he isnt giving him money or asking you if he could live with you both. you shouldn't take it so out of proportion.

Answer 11

If he would be selfish torwards his brother he would not do squat for you eithier.

Answer 12

I know how you feel but it's his brother. Imagine if your sister or your brother just got out of prison..they have nothing, job, money..the only thing they have is family. So as ur husband is one of his family, He helps his brother...Would you help your sister/brother in this situation?

He drops you off at work? or at bus stop? and picks up his brother and takes him to work?

If he drops u off at work..i think that's fine as long as he pays for the gas hehehe.

I understand that he thinks his brother needs some help and support for a while..so let's wait and see..mabe after 2-3 months when everything is settled. You may start to talk to him about the car..that you need to use it..and if he wants to pick up his brother everyday and take him to work..he may need to get his own car to do so.

Answer 13

I don't think what your husband is doing is wrong. His brother will always be his brother, despite him being a 45 year old repeat offender and if your husband isn't doing anything idiotic like giving him your last, then I don't see anything wrong with him giving a little helpful hand just so the man could get back on his feet. Does your husband put gas in your truck, help with the maintenance? Then it's his truck as much as yours and I think you are being a bit selfish. Now if this goes on for a long while without his brother finding his own way and this is getting in your way, then you have reason to speak up. But you said he just got back in town this past weekend, give your husband a break and let him be the good brother he wants to be. He doesn't see him as just a 45 year old repeated offender like you, he sees him as the guy he grew up with, his own flesh and blood.

Good luck.