My husband always talks about our arguments even when i ask him not to?

Question

what do i do? is it impossible to respect my wishes am i asking for too much?

Answer 1

You sound very insecure and controlling.

Why can't your husband have someone to confide in about your marriage and act as a sounding board -- an impartial party who could help him and in turn help you by causing him to get better at communicating with you?

I would personally get over yourself and let him have a confidante

Answer 2

Is he talking to other people?  There really isn't much you can do to control that except ask him to respect your privacy as a couple and stop doing it.

If he is bringing up past arguments to you, then it doesn't sound as if they're resolved in his mind.  When he does this, ask him point-blank whether or not he believes the issue to be resolved.  If he says yes, tell him he needs to drop it then.  If he persists, tell him you don't want to discuss a resolved issue from the past and leave the room.  Don't say anything else until he's willing to change the topic.  If he says he doesn't think it's resolved, ask him to explain specifically why.  When he does, discuss the issue with him until you get his confirmation that he believes the issue to be resolved.  Then put that one on the closed argument list.

Answer 3

If you've respectfully told him to stop bringing up arguments, and he doesn't, you may have to go to counseling because it sounds like he isn't willing to let go. Also, he may be bringing them up because he has a deeper issue that he doesn't know how to discuss with you. He may not know what that issue is, but going to counseling is supposed to help the marriage all around anyway. And you are not asking for too much. You have a right to try to stop talking about past arguments. It sounds like he is trying to push your buttons. There is no point bringing up past issues when all you can do is live for now and the future. You cannot change what has already been said and done.

Answer 4

leave his tired *** if he can't respect a simple wish what makes you think he respects you