My husband and I have been separated for 8 months and he is fighting me for our children...?

Question

But both of our children have requested to live with me and he won't drop the custody battle. He isn't and hasn't gave me anything for child support but he has no problem paying his TEAM of lawyers any money!! This custody thing is a bit ridiculous as it is and I cannot even afford a decent lawyer because I am working a full time job and basically supporting two children on my own. Why does a man who never had sh*t to do with his kids before is all of a sudden wanting to take them from a great mom. Yeah, I will boast about that because I really am a GREAT mom... What kind of help can I get financially wise, to be able to hire a good attorney as well. These days you never know what a judge is going to say and I am not willing to lose my kids because I could not afford a good attorney. No one in my family is able to help me at this time with the extra cash, I need about 4 grand for a really good lawyer...Any help would be great...thanks to all and God bless..Please, if anything, keep me and my two great kids in your prayers....

Answer 1

   He doesn't want the children.  He wants to make you miserable.  And he is succeeding.  Google free lawyers in_________ (whatever your state is).  Most states have some type of legal program for people in your situation  They may not be free, but even reduced fee is a big help.

Answer 2

I know exactly how you feel. Does he really care about the kids or is more to get back at you? You will be in my prayers stay strong for those kids. Go to the domestics office and file tomorrow he will have to pay back child support from the time you filed also go for spousal support help yourself out at least it could pay for your lawyer.

Answer 3

This is emotional warfare at its finest.  He knows that the deepest way he can hurt you is through the children, so he's doing it.

Now, step away from the emotion for a minute and think about this logically.  If you're a great mom then you can't be an unfit mom.  In order for him to remove your children from your life, he would have to prove you to be unfit.  That's not an easy task at all.  Not even the finest attorneys can pull it off if there is no proof.

Forget about what's happened between the two of you for a bit.  Is he, or can he be, a decent father?  If so, be willing to recognize this and know that your children deserve to have him in their lives.

Call the legal aid office at the family court in your area.  Even if you don't qualify for them to represent you in court, they can and will help you to understand all of the documents and step you through the process of appealing/countering petitions, etc.  You can do this yourself, you just have to remain strong.  Keep your kids at the forefront of your mind and avoid the temptation to be sucked into the nastiness that your husband is spewing.  Don't discuss anything with him.  Work through his attorneys with the guidance of legal aid.  This will all work out if you remain calm and reasonable.  I wish you and your children the best of luck.  

Answer 4

Honestly why isn't that your argument to the court?  Meaning why aren't you willing to go up there and say "he wants his kids so bad that he pays his lawyers instead of paying child support.  And I'm working fulltime to pay for kids and I cannot even begin to pay for a lawyer."

Just wait for the divorce proceedings to figure out all that stuff.  Being separated is one thing, but being divorced is another.

Answer 5

Try the local Catholic Charities!!  I was a single mom going through a custody battle and they provided me a lawyer for NOTHING!!  You don't even have to be Catholic.  If they can't help, they have great avenues for you.  Also, call your local law school.  A lot of these schools need cases like yours for the students.  They of course don't do the work, the professors over see them.  But they are gung ho and fresh. Looking for "the kill".  If that doesn't work, talk to your church.  Ask them to help with a yard sale and bake sale to help you raise the money.  Good luck hun!

Answer 6

I was in the same boat a few years back and I called legal aid. They hooked me up with a great lawyer and I didn't have to pay a dime and got full custody of my kids plus support and health insurance. I was also working full time and still did not have to pay for my lawyer. Call them and see what they can do for you. Good Luck.

Answer 7

Well, one thing in your favor is that they usually favor the mother. Thats just how it works. And its going to make him look really bad that he can afford a team of lawyers, yet you are the one supporting yourself and the kids. I woul go into court without an attorney and when they ask you if you have one, say 'No, sir, as I am a single mother with one income and no child support I cannot afford one'. I think that may work!?!

Answer 8

He doesn't want the kids.  He wants to hurt you and he doesn't want to pay child support.  Every city has a legal aid organization or divorce support group.  Call them asap and find out what other options are available to you.  

Just a word of hope - my ex wanted custody of his daughter.  The lawyer we talked to said it is very unusual for a judge to award custody to the father unless the mother was very obviously unfit.  Good luck!