My husband called me another womans name in bed (his ex) twice last night, any male opinions?

Question

My husband went out drinking the other night with his ex. We've been together for 9 years married for 3 and have 2 beautiful little girls. Well we have been arguing about this hussy since he went drinking with her. Last night while making love he called me her TWICE..He stopped I cried, he said Im so sorry , I swear I wasnt thinking of her I dont know where that came from, maybe because we have been talking about her all day. I dont know what to think of this. Was he really wishing I was her? Was it really a mistake? Has anyone ever gone through this? I dont want to leave, I know he really loves me and I cannot see hurting my 5 year old daughter over this. Please no bashing, just anyone with an honest opinion, male or female, please help me make since of this if you can. Thank you

Answer 1

I know its goin to be hard on you but lets just assume it happend because he had been spending time with her. It happend to me once, i called a guy's name, he wasn't even my Ex and i did'nt have a crush on him either; he was just a friend. My boyfriend found it hard to believe at first, but he knew we'd been goin for rehasals together.

Please try and forget it, don't listen to whoever is telling you to leave him, give him another chance because these things happen. The fact that he did'nt tell you he was hanging out with her is a bad sign, but as a mother we should learn to all sorts because of the kids.

All the best dearie. I feel you.

Answer 2

My opinion is it was just a accident he didn't mean to do it

Answer 3

dump him

Answer 4

similiar experiences different sides of the coin.

Okay here goes, when i first met my ex wife years ago, i accidently called her by the previous ex girlfriends name during s*x. I honestly didn't mean to. What had happened was i had also met up with the first ex to settle up on some outstanding issues of how to divy up the apartment. when I got home to the new girlfriend (now ex wife) we talked about what was said and what took place. That night during s*x I called her by the first ex's name. needless to say this started a major rift between us. I don't know why and I can't explain why I did what I did. The only thing i can think of was that even though I wasn't interested in her anymore seeing her that day brought back a range of emotions on a sub concious level. She honestly didn't mean anything to me anymore. In the heat of passion, the wires got mixed and an old name came out. I felt like **** knowing I had caused my new GF to be hurt. I tried to make it up to her any way I could and it took me nearly 2 years to gain back her trust. those two years were very strained. All together she came to realize that it was an honest mistake and meant nothing. We were together for ten years and she finally left because she could not deal with raising our 3 children. at the end of our relationship we even started to joke about it. But I never forgot the hurt i caused her that night. This is my story. please watch out it may have been innocent, but if it happens consistently then you need to take a deeper look as to why.  

Answer 5

Why in the world would he go out for drinks with his ex? Even if he did... Why wouldn't you go with? That isn't okay. I wouldn't allow it, personally.

Answer 6

This only goes to illustrate why it is a bad idea to learn the names of the women you go to bed with.

Answer 7

if he did call her name he was probally thinking about her, have you ever fantasized abiut anouther guy you been with while having s*x with him sometime its only natural to remember, it might mean nouthing but i sure wouldnt want him to see her again with out you there.  

Answer 8

My honest opinion is that if he was completely sober while making love to you and he said her name twice then he was obviously thinking about her while being with you. I am sorry but you are going to have to help him get over this girl and obviously let him know that if he chooses to hang out with her again that you would like to be present. You need to find a way to spice up your marriage because he may be a tad bored and contemplating a relationship with the ex.. best

wishes

Oh, he went out with her and hid it from you...that is not cool..not cool at all!! I would take actions to protect you and your daughters, maybe talk to him about a seperation, you have got to make sure that he knows you can not be jerked around because it seems like he has little respect for you and your marriage!

Answer 9

My first wife died around 2 1/2 years ago. We had been married 36 years. I still often call my new wife by my first wife's name. Thirty six years is a very long time and you become part of each other but it doesn't take anything like 36 years to get this feeling. If she can't accept this as a fact of life she shouldn't have married him. We all say things without stopping to think.

Answer 10

Why would he be out drinking with the ex?

An now that you found out about them meeting for drinks, I think I'd put my foot down about who he spends his free time with.

Maybe you should check a little more in depth to find out how long this has been going on.

And if it continues, I hope you have a plan B in the works.