My husband does not want to combine our money. I don't think it is right!?

Question

He pays the mortgage and has almost 250.00 a week for his self. I pay for pretty much everything else! utilities, car payment, Medical insurance, dental, car insurance, home insurance, food, stuff for the kids, cell phones and groceries. Plus we have two loans i pay on. Sometimes I only can pay a little on each bill because I can't pay them in full. He is always broke...I don't know what to do.

Answer 1

if he doesn't want to combine the money try taking all the bills including the mortgage and sitting down and splitting them down the middle

Answer 2

I think combining of finances is up to the couple but I think you should have known or asked before you had gotten married about his take on combining the finances. I think if you knew ahead of being married he did not believe in that then you know what you were marrying and you have no say. I do think you should sit down with him and re-asses your finances and bills and who pays for what. Doesnt seem fair you seem to pay for everything.

Good Luck and be calm, mature and no finger pointing!

Answer 3

Don't take this the wrong way, but isn't this an issue that you should have worked through before saying: "I Do"?

Answer 4

I agree...a marriage is a joint relationship shared equally and that includes the money.  If he won't combine the money then what you should do is figure out what percentage of the total income each of you brings in and then each of you is responsible for that percentage of each and every bill.

Answer 5

Wow....It sounds like his priorities are misplaced. I do not know of too many spouses who only pay one bill and have $250 to blow (on themselves) each week...

Sounds like you need to lay down the law and demand that ALL monies go into the joint account. When you are married - it is not a case of MINE - it is OURS.

Good luck.

Answer 6

I agree that your incomes should be combined.  If he isn't willing to do so then tell him you can't afford to pay everything and that you're destroying your credit by only making partial payments.  Pick a couple of the utilities and tell him that he needs to take responsibility for them.  Then, don't pay them any more.  When the bills come in hand them over to him.  If he doesn't pay them, he'll get the message when the power and phone are turned off.  If he wants to keep things separate then he needs to step up and assume more responsibility for your combined debt.

Answer 7

Why dont you two take all the bills you have between the two of you, figure out the monthly total, then both contribute half to a joint bank account..  Anything you have left over individually stays in your own respective accounts for whatever you please.

Answer 8

Let me first say,when I was reading this I said,WHAT! out loud.This is unacceptable. All of this **** you are paying for and he's paying for really NOTHING!! Why the h3LL is he always broke.He don't pay for nothing.Please talk this man,cause if you don't,you'll continue to pay for all this ****.

Answer 9

Joint checking account and put him on an allowance.  Tell him it's for his own good.

Answer 10

i tell him look we married we put money together and pay all bill what left we spilt 2 way.  

Answer 11

Tell him marriage is 50/50 and he needs to start helping you out with the other bills.

Answer 12

I think you mean he doesn't want to combine your expenses? You seem to have a lot more on your hands than he does. It isn't fair for you. You need to calculate everything together and estimate to see what your monthly expenses are and split them that way. Just give him a good proposal.

Answer 13

Stop paying for some things like his cell phone, the cable or satellite bill, his car, his car insurance and other stuff that is important to him. Let him know in advance either he starts contributing more to bills or you all are going to have to cut back.

Answer 14

its not a good idea. b/c if you were ever to get divorced or get into an argument he could claim all of ur money im that account. also i think its a good idea to have 3 accounts. 1 for u. 1 for him. and 1 for your combined money.

Answer 15

If it's like you say - it doesn't sound fair (you didn't add up your portion and compare it to the mortgage amount).  You guys should start with a joint checking account that you both contribute half of total expenses to or better yet - the individual percentages of your total income (if he makes 75% of the total income, then he should pay 75% of the total expenses - and this is sort of how they figure out alimony/child support amounts).  By a joint account - that doesn't mean you can't have your individual accounts too.  Expenses include everything you're paying for the household or kids including groceries, stuff for kids, credit cards that have common household purchases on them (you may want 1 or 2 of those and 1 or 2 individual that only the user is responsible for).

Answer 16

open a joint checking account for bills only. then each of you put in an equal share to cover the bills. then whats left for each of you is yours to do as you please. tell him he is wasting money while you are scraping by. start feeding him hamburger while you and the kids have something better and tell him its because there wasnt enough money left. he will get the hint.