My husband is LAZY !?!?

Question

Ok, my husband has been unemployed for 6 MONTHS, he's been kinda trying to find stupid odd and end jobs but nothing serious. Now I'm 29 wks pregnant w/a 2 1/2 yr old. We can't pay bills at all, we've already lost our car. I had to pawn my wedding rings to pay bills (didn't pay much). Now its like it kills him to even help around the house. All I ask him to do is wash dishes b/c it hurts for me to stand that long and its like a have to pull teeth just to get him to do that. I've tried everything I can think of to get him off his ***. I've pushed him out the door and told him not to come back until he has a job, but nothing works!!!!!!!!!! How can I make my immature husband GROW UP!?!??

Answer 1

He may be depressed.  But than again maybe he has just become lazy.  If you really wanted to help support his family he would be working at McDonald's.  Has he always had a hard time keeping a job?  Has something happened in the last year?

You need to make a choice.  Either you stay with him or you leave.  I think first you may want to take him to a doctor (yes it cost money) to see if he is clinically depressed.  This may be the case.  

Answer 2

Are you sure it isn't depression? Or is it just pure laziness? You need to sit down and talk to him and let him know how serious this really is. I mean losing your car and not being able to pay bills...what's next being thrown out on the street? I mean, you shouldn't have to worry about that kind of stuff! Tell him how much this stress can really hurt you and the baby...and that you need him to step up and be a man. He promised to help you when he married you, it's a 50/50 relationship..not 100/0!!!

If anything else, go on strike with him. No s*x or anything until he straightens up...lol...

I'm sorry you are going through this. My husband was laid off 4 and half months ago and we are starting to struggle, too. Luckily my husband has been helping immensely and has been seriously looking for a job for months now. Good Luck, I hope you can knock some sense into him. What does he do all day anyways?

Answer 3

It sounds to me like your husband is depressed.  But either way the only way he can fix anything is to get a job.  Any job is better than no job, even if it is fast food, they pay better than no job.  It is going to take something drastic to make him get off his butt apparently.  I would leave him and if he wants you back he has to get some sort of a steady job.  

Answer 4

TO LET YOU KNOW THERE ARE NO JOBE OUT THERE AND ALL MEN ARE LAZZY

Answer 5

I've pushed him out the door and told him not to come back until he has a job, but nothing works!!!!!!!!!!

why did you let him back???

he is not going to change until you show him you are serious, this means not backing down on your word.

kick him out and apply for WIC assistance to help you in your time of need.

Answer 6

you pushed him out the door and told him not to come back with out a job? where is his now, back in the house with now job right...

You took him back in, without him doing anything, so why does he think he should do anything if he knows you are goin to take him back.

Leave him, go stay with family or something...you need support right now, financialy and emotionally. go talk with social services, they can help you. cancel everything you have in the house that is in your name, and let him deal with the rest himself...

he needs a wake up call.

Answer 7

i kinda know what you are going through i didnt have another kid at home with my first but i know what you are going through with your husband being immature!! i dont want to tell you how mine turned out but im remarried and a lot happier with the way things are now!! but i dont wish that on anyone!! counsling?? medicaid can help pay for it!! i know its not what you want to here though i wish i could say something that would help but there is not a lot you can say

Answer 8

i honestly don't know what some guys problem is. i have a couple friends who have gone through the same thing. my best friend had to work her butt off clear untill the day she went into labor. she worked 60 hours a week at a nursing home while her husband sat on his butt all day doing drugs and drinking with his buddies. my other friend wasn't in as bad of shape. when she found out she was pregnant, she quit her job because she could not do the lifting. her boyfriend had a good job, but lost it because of calling off too much. she was 7 months along when he lost his job. it's been 3 months since she had her baby, and she had to go back to work just 4 weeks after having her baby because her boyfriend would not get a job. now, she's working a full time job, and a part time job to try and make ends meet while he lies in bed all day long. they have had their electric, gas, and phone shut off for about 2 months now. she's had to stay at her parents house with her baby because of there being no utilities turned on at home. and guess what? he still lies in bed all day long.

my best advice for women going through this with thier husbands or boyfriends is to just leave untill they can get thier act together. he is bringing you down. there is no sense in suffering because of somebody else. you don't have to leave for good, just give him a good wake up call.

Answer 9

How are you paying for food and medical expenses?  If you are on public assistance, shame on you!  Both you and your husband should be working full time....even if it's at WalMart or Burger King.  You chose to have a second child...now you must pay for it.  

Answer 10

Have you threatend to leave unless he starts to grow up and help out. You are preg for godsakes!  you shouldn't be the one doing all the work. contact your DHS office to see what assistance you can get for you and your children