My husband is having dreams of sexually wanting to be with previous crushes?

Question

My husband has dreams of wanting to sexually be with prievous middle school crushes. In his dreams he fondling, groping them, telling them that he wants it, that he needs it, mean while touching me in his sleep. His crushes push him away playfully saying stop. He also says that nothing has ever happened in them as well. He says he cant control his dreams, and he doesnt know what they mean, but hes willing to share them with me.

Im starting to take them personally cause he never has these dreams with me in them.

Answer 1

Dreams dont mean nothing HOPEFULLY. My sons birthday was today and his party is Saturday. And a few night ago my husband dreamed no one came to his party.  And then last night he dreamed that I cheated on him with my next door neighbor and he found out on my sons birthday. BTW that is nasty. lol I think it is because he is stressing over my sons birthday party, Maybe your husband is wanting sometihng from his past. Needing to relive something

Answer 2

He sounds sexually repressed.

You're his wife: fix it!

Answer 3

its normal just be glad that he told u and trusts u so it obviously meens nuthing

Answer 4

talk to him first  it is  becoming uncomfortsble tell him its the touching  that is bothering you that you are being touched while wanting to ignore the probelm  that it wont work  ..and that thier needs to be changes   its  a dream you understand  but that you dont like  being  touched  while  thats in your head ./... sooo dont let him touch you when it happens and   you hope he understands ....

Answer 5

I think you should visit a marriage counselor or a marriage psychologist. Marriage should be a complete devotion to one another. Try to get closer to him, and make him know that you know him.

Answer 6

i say you should have role play s*x every night so that the only person he is thinking of or dreaming of is you.

Answer 7

Your husband needs to keep his dreams to himself.  I agree that he can't control his dreams, but he CAN control what he says to you about the dreams.  I don't blame you for being hurt.  I would be hurt too, if my wife said she was dreaming of other guys.  Some things are best left unsaid, and his dreams are definitely one of those.

Answer 8

it means hes having an affair, my friend josh had the same thing happen to him

Answer 9

they mean aboustly nothing accoriding to what i read and whats happened to me i had some really wired dreams where i would never do that so i wouldnt worry about it he cant control what goes on in his dreams

Answer 10

It could just nessasarily be some things that hes thinking about when hes  awake. such as seeing a old middle school buddy, remembering his ms years, being sexually active with you. just little bits of anything in his life, or wat hes thinking. im sure he doesnt mean any of it. but they all conect. i wouldnt worry about it to much just get his mind of the topics hes thinking of. possibly a fun day out. it surley doesnt mean wat it plays out to be in his dreams. hope i helped : )

Answer 11

Give him a break...

... just in case, keep him satisfied :)

Answer 12

He really can't control his dreams.  You would not believe some of the weird stuff I dream about, and I'm only guessing here but that may be true for just about everybody.  Dreams are what your brain does to problem solve or interpret in its own weird way the things that happen during the time you're awake.  Add a generous dash of hormones and this is what, allegedly, your husband's brain comes up with.  The real question is why he wants to share these purported dreams with you.  If it's a sort of "in your face" thing with him, then you are correct in taking in personally.  Otherwise, you can just politely tell him you're not interested in hearing about his middle school crushes.  If he persists, I'm sure you can make up some dreams of your own to "share" with him.  Have a camera ready and take a picture of his face when you do.

Answer 13

Firstly, you are lucky that your spouse is frank with you to share his dreams and earlier life. It's a fact that there is no control over dreams but they definitely have some meaning - ask any psychoanalyst. In your case, may be, he finds something lacking in you and his subconscious mind strays back to his previous crushes. There's nothing to worry; just co-operate with him and try to find out which girl he used to like most and what were her typical specialities. Accordingly, you should try to re-shape yourself to fit into the frame of the girl of his dreams. It may not be easy but not impossible. Remember that marriage is an institution of compromise and faith and needs to be protected and preserved at all costs. Good luck!

Answer 14

he's just really horny i say get down and dirty with him

Answer 15

COMPLETELY NORMAL---dnt act like u never looked at another guy after marraige--even if for 0.5 of a second. He`s married....he realizes he`s meant 2 only be with u knw, so s*x with other SUBCONCIOUSLY attractive women results as a primitive manly sense. He resorts 2 s*x in dreams with others simply cuz his brain tells him he cant do it in reality, mabey cuz he LOVE`S U SOO MUCH. Ur his next 70 or wateva years of nokie  babe....and he`s urs :S :)

Answer 16

Ok well that IS a bit odd, BUT I wanted to be clear here.....

Have you ever had a dream that did not involve him that was sexual.

My guess is yes.

Did you share it?

My guess is no.

He is trying to be open and honest with you. I know it obviously does not make you smile to hear that c**p, but its something of a + on his part from my standpoint that he is even willing to disclose what the situation is.

Shows he cares about your feelings from my standpoint.

Next time he does it....talk in a real deep manly voice back.....see how he reacts.

That would be funny.

= )

Be well, wish you the best and try not to take it too personally.

I know its hard not to, but from my understanding...we all have sexual dreams...Some of them may not include our S.O. if we happen to be in a relationship at the time.....its just the way our brain works.

Answer 17

dreams are kinda random...but they always mean something..if i were you id just let it go...it sounds like its a hole waiting to be dug..

Answer 18

You can take it personally, but he really can't control his dreams. If anyone could, we'd never have nightmares!

I know a fair amount about dreams, and I know two things: a/ the dreams are actual thoughts playing out or b/ the things that are happening in the dream, as well as the girls, are just symbols of something else that is happening in your husband's life.

I've never gotten a straight answer as to whether a/ or b/ is correct for interpreting what they mean.

If he or you are curious about what the dream means symbolically, hit up dreammoods.com.

Good luck!

Answer 19

Relax...They are only dreams. Maybe you should where him out first before he nods off to sleep. With good s*x, pfff I never dream. I just pass out and don't remember anything. Usually when I dream about s*x is when I haven't had it in awhile. Satisfy your man and you won't go wrong.....

Answer 20

it's true he can't really control his dreams until after they have started, even then it's hard. I'm guessing he wanted those things at the time but they never happened

Answer 21

take him to a dream doctor :P

Answer 22

Sometimes s*x dreams don't actually have much to do with s*x. It could just be a younger part of his subconscious coming out. Or...he could be subconsciously trying to re-connect with his younger self.

Answer 23

I'm happily married so here's my advice:  let it go.  Men rarely, if ever have dreams about their wives.  Why would he?  He already "has" you.  It's every other woman in the world he's NOT currently sleeping with that he dreams about.  

On the other hand, if the girls in his dreams are middle-school AGED and in his dream he is not....well, if that's the case, I'd be looking for a good divorce attorney, because that man has problems you ain't gonna fix.

Answer 24

Why is he sharing his dreams with you?    If he had any brains, he'd keep them to himself.    I think he just wants to antagonize you.

Answer 25

Usually dreams are trying to tell you something. but what do you think it could be? Maybe he should stop telling you what his dreams are about if you take it personally. After all, he is right, you can't really control what you dream.

Answer 26

They're just dreams, and he really can't control them. I know it's hard not to take them personally (I am somewhat jealous, and would definitely struggle with this situation), but keep reminding yourself that even if he dreams of those girls, the one he really wants to be with is YOU.  He's with you, not them.  Perhaps some recent event triggered some middle school memories?  I don't think you  need to worry about it; the fact that he's telling you also shows that he's not hiding anything.

Answer 27

well i have had dreams about aliens and killers, but bigfoot doesnt get angry if hes not in them!

dont take it personal. its just a dream. the brain is a funny machine, and brings up random things and replaces them with recent memories too. laugh it off. hes with you now, not them right ! :D

Answer 28

this is fu*kin bull sh*t...excuse me for saying that...cuz i don't like these men who try to hurt the woman to get their attention...ur man needs acknowledgment...that's all....satisfy his demand and he will stop bull sh*ting around...srry to be mean