My husband wants to adopt my son???

Question

Right now I have sole custody, and the biological father of my 3 year old has visitation rights but on my terms. He calls every once in a while and wants to see his son and then ditchs out and I don't hear from him for months. Now the man I am with now is a father to my son!! The biological father is known for going to jail, beating me when we were together and he just loves to torture me...

Is it impossible to adopt a child without the consent of the other parent, or would I be able to fight him and possible force it??

We all want this man out of our lifes. I never know what he is capable of doing and My son doesn't even know the guy. He just keeps going to jail anyways because he refuses to pay child support, and it is ordered.

Answer 1

Read this:

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...

What's the hurry?

Who's to say you will be choosing a better guy THIS time?!

SLOW DOWN.

Answer 2

Yes it is possible to adopt without the consent of the other person.  I did it myself.  I think it will be easy for you, with the background he has but I would advise you to start right now, and go back as far as you can, making notes of what he has done and what he hasn't done.  i.e. beating you - not turned up to visit the child.  Write down every detail of this mans relationship with the boy and then when you get to court re adoption, you will have everything in front of you.  Being prepared is a must. It may turn out that he will not fight you on this and just let go.  On the otherhand he may try and fight it, by putting the blame of HIS actions, on you.  Be prepared!

MEGAN has used a word to describe this man, which I have not heard before. I LOVE it.  That is exactly what he is, a "sperm doner".

Answer 3

Tell him to upgrade!!

Answer 4

Either the bio father has to consent or there has to have been something severely wrong to get them terminate his rights without his permission. Since he has been involved in the child's life it seems very unlikely he is going to let this happen. He can be scum of the earth but apparently that doesn't matter so long as he doesn't want his rights terminated or hasn't done anything to jeopordize the child's life.

  If you know upfront that he's going to fight it and you pursue getting it done anyway it can be VERY expensive and possible still not work out to your advantage.

Answer 5

well, you are the sole custody of the child. If you have prove that the biological father is unfit to visit the child, then you can get a restraint order. Your husband now, is your child's stepfather. Tell him to treat his stepson like his real son.

Answer 6

I think that between the spousal abuse, the repeated failure to pay child support, and the periodic abandonment of any contact with the child, you would have very reasonable grounds to petition the court to terminate his parental rights, even without his consent.

If he's so against paying support that he's gone to jail over it more than once, he might not fight it-- he might be glad not to have to pay support anymore.

If I were you, I would probably be trying to get his rights terminated regardless of who you are with now. Someone who is abusive and unpredictable should not have unrestricted and unsupervised access to your son. That could be a danger to your child, and if the judge also feels it's a danger, your family might not have to be in that situation any longer.

As for your current partner adopting the child-- please make sure it's a stable, long term, and committed relationship before that happens. If he adopts your child, he is your child's father forever. That shouldn't happen unless you are both ready to make the commitment to being a permanent family, and your child accepts it as what he wants in the situation too.

Answer 7

The biological father will have to consent.  Since he doesn't pay child support or see the child anyway, maybe you can convince him to give up his rights.  Otherwise, keep taking him to court for child support.

Answer 8

i myself went through that when i was 6 years old. we did have to take my "sperm donor" to court because he refused to sign his rights over completely, long story short they took me into chambers with my dad and the sperm donor and the judge asked me who my daddy was and i of course pointed to my dad and the judge asked who is he? (pointing to the sperm donor) and i said i didn't know. based on that the judge revoked the sperm donors rights and my dad adopted me. that was 12 years ago and that sperm donor saw me once about 2 years ago and didn't even recognize me.

Answer 9

I am so positive that no judge in his right mind would go against you on this.  Get a lawyer and get a copy of his criminal background and the rest should be easy.

Answer 10

The answer to this question is simple.  If the man you are with is treating your son like his own, then he is the best father figure in his life and that should be commended. However, having sole custody of the child does not give you the right, even with a criminal background and no parental guidance coming from the absent father, to take away rights that he has just by being his father biologically.  Although you may want your new guy to be the father of your son in a previous relationship, it is best for all parties involved to be as supportive and loving to the child as possible and always keep the childs welfare best at heart.  When your son gets old enough to have a court hear why he does not want ties to his real father, then in some courts they will find it just and best for the child to allow custody and domestic parental rights to the father figure currently in his life with more of a father ties history.  Take is slowly and things will happen the way there were meant to.  If that man does good by him, he can never hold it against him, even if he always knows he's not his real father.  Best of luck and my blessings to you and your family.

Answer 11

Pookie is right.  If this guy has been involved, however little, it's difficult to get rid of him but there are things you can do.

Have you contacted your state's Child Support Division?  Many states will pull licenses (driver's or professtional like plumbing, cpa, att'y) and passports.  Sic them on him.

If he is not paying support he should be accruing a sizeable debt including interest on the amount he hasn't paid.  Some states recognize non-payment of support as abandonment.  And some even have criminal penalties for non support.  If this guy isn't really interested in having a relationship with your son you may be able to convince him to sign off in exchange for waiving his outstanding support obligation.

Finally, if you are able to get him to sign off or if you get his rights terminated and your husband adopts, the adoptive parent takes all rights and responsibilities.  This means that if the two of you divorce, you may have to battle him for custody.  Either one of you may end up paying child support to the other.  Think it through carefully.

Answer 12

if u have proof of it all u have a bigger chance of getting full care of him until 18 or 21 depends where in the world