My little boy is HATING Kindergarten!?

Question

First, let me say that he has just turned 5 at the end of July, so he is younger than most of the kids in his class. (if that is any consolation) He got into trouble today for pinching another kid that wouldn't give him a turn with a book and for running in the hall and talking in the hall. The teacher uses a stop light with clothes pins with the kids name on them and moves them around throughout the day: green is good, yellow is a warning and red is trouble. At Back to School night last night she told us parents that she rarely has to move to the red and gives the student a few warnings. Of course today he came home with a red card that needed to be signed and returned. I feel so bad. This is only the 4th day of school and he is the first to be in big trouble. We talked to him and explained that the next time would mean he would lose his tv privileges, which he loves. He seemed to understand but I'm at a loss... I don't know what to do. We haven't really had any issues like this before now. He was in preschool for 2 years and did fine. Of course it was a smaller, much more fun atmosphere, but...

Any suggestions??

Answer 1

It's so early, and the transition is hard for a lot of kids. I worked at an elementary school and in the first couple weeks, lots of Kindergarten students screamed and had fits. It's hard to adjust to a institutional environment when you're so little. It will definitely get better. But in the meantime, ask his teacher for a list of the classroom rules. You can go over them with him and give examples "Is it OK if I do ___"  "What will happen when I do ___?" etc. Let him know you support and agree with the school and his teacher-- there needs to be a united front. Make sure there's a real consequence at home for acting up at school.

Good luck!

Answer 2

i agree with the other answer he just needs time to adjust again. try forcing the rules from school at home that should help some too. to try and make you feel better let me let you know what my nephew did. when he was in kindergarten he ran out of the room out the door then around the school. the whole time the teacher aid and the principle were chasing him. then after about a month the teacher told my brother that he had anger management problems. he is 15 now and a great kid. oh by the way we never got him in anything for the anger. there was no problem the teacher just didn't know how to handle him. he did get better after about a 1 1/2 months. he had never been away from home until then. good luck and i hope it all works out for you.  

Answer 3

When i was in kindergarten i punched kids so much and got in so much trouble but i was just a scared little kid

Answer 4

15 years ago I took my daughter out of a kindergarten class with a teacher like that and insisted that she be in a class where the teacher had better coping skills.  

Your son's teacher is trying to establish the tone for discipline in the first week of school, and they need to do that, but not at the expense of any kid's ego.  

You need to make an appointment to talk to your child's teacher and suggest that humiliating your child or anybody else's in the first week of school is too harsh, cruel and unacceptable.  There are other methods of discipline, such as "time out", etc.  Be proactive right away and intervene on behalf of your child.   Follow your instinct.

It is not good for kids to think that their teachers can do anything they want to them.  Kids need their parents to advocate for them.  Don't let your child be the object of a teacher's bullying tactics, especially if he did fine in preschool.  Teachers like that need a clear message.  

If the teacher refuses to modify her discipline measures, bring the situation to the school principal's attention immediately.  Do not allow your child to be crushed.

Good luck.

Answer 5

separation anxiety he or she just needs to learn to adjust

Answer 6

You need to make sure he realizes under no

circumstances to act out in anger to another

child. That is something that he learns at home

from you. When kids are seen by others as a

bully they stay away from them. You need to sit

down with him and tell him what is expected and

what the consequences are for not listening and

acting out in school. It is not fair to the other kids

to have to deal with that. It sounds like you are

taking the steps in the right direction. I know

it is hard, my son started kinder this year too. It

is a big trasition but things will get better as time

passes and he realizes what is expected.

Answer 7

You should probally talk to him about good bahavor and tell him that the school isn't bad and that he's safe.

Answer 8

Kindergarten is much more structured than preschool and while play is still an integral part of the day there are certain rules that need to be followed.  

It sounds like he may be having trouble adjusting and that he needs some time to learn the routine.  Let him try it for another week and perhaps give him some incentives like going to the park after school if he has 2 good days in a row.  

If after a week he is still having trouble try talking to the teacher again to see exactly what he is doing.  If this does not remedy the situation then maybe you can sit in on his class one day to observe the behaviour for yourself.  This may give you a clearer idea of how to help him.

Best of luck