My lying partner did something unforgivable !!!

Question

In february this year my partners mother died, he was devastated because his father died of cancer 3 years ago. He didn't go to work cause he couldn't cope with her death but he needed money to pay for her funeral. So out of the goodness of my heart I lent him the money to pay for it (and he still hasn't paid me back) I know I should not have lent him money as I'm in my late 30,s and this was all my savings, but it was for a funeral

At the time we didn'tt live together, but since then he has moved in with me.

NOW for the horrible bit....I just found out last night that his mum is in fact very much alive she didn't die at all she only has been put into a nursing home. When I found this out I wasdevastatedd and felt so sick.

My partner still does not know that I know yet.

I want him out of my life I think this is a horrible thing to do to someone, not only did he basically steal money from me but he used me in every way.

Please tell me..am I being to hard on him? should I give him a chance to explain, or what should I do.??

Is there anyway to get my money back ?

Answer 1

Ok now the revenge part...never get away him for making a fool out of u..and using ur goodwill....so plan a holiday...excuse some well made plans and dupe him (dupe him in normal way so that u wont get into some legal hassles).....show atmost care and love and secretly find soem job else wher then once u r thrugh wth ur revenge..just vanish...and let him ruin his life for dis ever...and u will have the last laugh.......for ideas..u cann contact me...i myslef has personally did this to my ever lying g/f and completely finihed her off for her cheating and lying,,,,mine was similar case with money...so plan and hit them back more boldly so that they will never recover.....goodluck

Answer 2

OMG...when i first started reading the question i assumed you guys were married and i was like why is she worried about lending money (and why separate money in the first place) to her own husband. But then i read on...and i realised you guys are just bf/gf...soo then that changes everything. No, i do not think you are being too hard on him as he broke your trust, robbed you, and did it all in a devious manner.But since it wasnt him who told you about the mother being alive your secondary source might have gotten information wrong. Basically, i do think you should get an explanation before doing something drastic...plenty of things could have triggered his lies....and once you get the explanation and if it is BS...then leave the guy. There is no way to get your money back other than legal matters but that in itself could get expensive soo id say forget it...or go to the mother who is alive. :) Good Luck!  

Answer 3

get him out,4get about him and move on

Answer 4

OMG that just makes my bloody boil... Gee forget about the money what about the fact that he lied to about his mum.. Thats just sick and wrong.. Pack his suit case full of just his clothes leave it @ the door, change the locks on the doors and keep everything else to the value of the money he stole from you...

What a prick!

Answer 5

That is so wrong.I would take him to court and get every cent back.Don't let him get away with it or he will expect to get away with everything else.I don't know how people can use other people like that and not feel guilty.....I hope you get the results that you want, goodluck.

Answer 6

i know what you are going through. I real dad said that i was dead and that he needed money to pay for my funeral. But he knew that i was alive he just wanted the money for drugs. My mum got rid of straight away has not looked back since. I don't even know my real father because of this lie that he told every-one.

But i think that you should take him to court and get the money back and then dump his sorry ar$$e

Answer 7

That is more than crossing the line. I dont even know what to say really. Well are you guys married or anything mabye he was getting something for you or setting up a trip for the two of you. Or.....he could just as well have a whole other life on the side. I would call him out on it! why wouldnt you? When did you guys go to the funeral? This is weird so did he go and you were magically at work or something? OMG! I would ask him about it so i could see the stupid lool on his face and i would leave him on the door step because thats major and if he has done this i cant imagin how much worse it could get.GOOD LUCK! You should write back and let us know what he said i am so wondering!

Answer 8

There is nothing to explain it wasn't alittle white lie is was a major lie that cost you I am sure thousands of dollars...... Unforgivable is right.... I would tell him what you found out and see what his excuse is....then I would tell him to pack his sh*t and get the f*ck out. He used you plain and simple. I am willing to bet that you will not see a dime of that money.....unfortunately.

Answer 9

2 options, take him to court to try and get your money back OR just cut your loss' and have nothing to do with him again, dont let him explain, just put his stuff out side and change the locks

Answer 10

God that is really really awful, personally i would confront him about it, what an enormous shock! why on earth would he have made it up?

i am wondering, did he know about how much money you had saved up before he made up the story? if so, i think yes, he was trying to trick you into giving him money, if no, i would say he is mentally ill.

confront him and hear his reason. ask for the money back. if he wont give it to you i would warn him that you may have to take him to court over it. when you have lived with someone for more than 6 months you have what is called a common law marriage, which could work for and against you. when you break up you can legally claim half your partners possessions/money/property etc.

good luck with that, how very heartbreaking, i am so sorry for you.

Answer 11

firstly can i say that is beyond tight......... a person needs to have bog balls to do such thing.

I say that you do leave him n that's nothing to feel guilty about. a person that does something like that to some1 that he supposedly loves is a phony like I say if he's capable the first time hes capable of doing it a 2nd and 3rd n 4th.................

with your money it depends did u have a written agreement or any form of contract if not you should see a lawyer anyway, cause it sounds like you sent him alottttttttt of money.

anyways i hope i helped in some way n i wish all the best....... n don't feel bad ur doing the Right thing

Answer 12

Everyone has said it, but I'm going to say it again.  Small claims court to get your money back.  He is a louse and no one you want to build a future with.

Get your money back and don't even look back!

Answer 13

Your partner is a con artist. He has no scruples whatsoever. Don't tell him you know about this. Just quietly make plans to leave and carry them out. Do not leave a forwarding address. You do not want him to know that you're aware of the con because I don't know what he'll do. When you end up somewhere safe, you can sue him for the money. But don't do it until you're safe.

Answer 14

What a louse! The only way to get the money back is to go to court.

You have to prove that you lent the money to him, but with the lie he told you, the judge will be sympathetic.

Next time you lend money to anyone - even a close sibling - get a written and signed contract made up.

You are not being hard on him at all. Confront him with the truth and get him out of your life.

Answer 15

*** hole!

take him to court

seriously

Answer 16

Nothing he could say would be ok. He has outright lied in a big way he has taken massive advantage of you and i am sorry but if he can carry out a lie as sick and twisted as that,  what else is he capable of.  Kick his **** out immediately and sorry to say but i think you lost your money.  I do wish you well in the future and remember there are good people out there.