My maid of honor, who is also my soon to be sister in law, has done nothing for my wedding,

Question

My wedding is in five days, i have also known her for 8 years. That's how i met my hubby to be. She told me she was doing a shower, even asked me for my list, NOTHING. Then she finally called me yesterday and said that she was taking friday off, day before the wedding,and would be at my beck and call. I don't even know what her dress looks like. I picked one out, when the one time she went with me. But when she went to get sized she picked out a different dress. I'm at my wits end. I think she enjoyed when i was single and unhappy. Shes made me fell like this is an unimportant day and she can't be bothered... Any advice.

Ps she was very excited when i asked her a year ago, and we talked every day, now i can't even get her on the phone...i feel very hurt and disappointed

Answer 1

Do you have any other bridesmaids? If you do I would just try to rely on them for help.

It's unfortunate that your friend is behaving in this manner - but it does happen to a lot of people. My best advice is that you not let it ruin your day. Just try to be prepared for the fact that she won't be at your beck and call. Rely on the other bridesmaids, your mom and other family members for help and support over the next few days.

All you need to focus on is getting yourself into your gorgeous gown and walking down the aisle towards your future husband. That is what the day is all about - keep a focus on that and try not to let what is happening with your MOH overshadow that.

Your day is important...if she can't be bothered with it then that's her problem. It's unfortunate that it worked out that way - but just keep thinking about putting on your gown that morning and your husband laying eyes on you for the first time in your dress; that will bring a smile to your face and make you realize that you two are the only ones who matter that day.

Answer 2

You're getting married, what a joyous occasion. Be happy! Think of all the poor, unmarried single girls who would love to be in your shoes.

Life is full of little things that don't go the way you want them to. How you handle them will determine your happiness. Make up your mind that nothing will destroy your happiness and it won't.

If your future sister in law/ friend does any of the things she committed to do or if she does nothing at all, it will be just fine. Don't let her or anyone else effect your happiness.

Answer 3

Ya know, this is a HUGELY common thread among brides...

the bitter bridesmaid/maid of honor.

I feel terrible for you.  

Honestly, wait til after the wedding, then talk to her about how she made you feel.  Its sucks to think that someone who is supposed to be someone who cares for you can be so bitter at the fact that your about to embark on one of the best days of your life...

I would have been on her *** sooner but hey, we all learn....

Just wait til after the wedding, or give the position to a bridemaid who has been more helpful...

It all depends on what you think she can handle, and what you can do to keep the peace until your wedding...

Thats tough, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do.

Answer 4

Well, five days before the wedding there's not a whole lot you can do. It's really too late to plan a real shower, although what you could do is call and ask her, and if she's not got anything planned, ask everyone to meet you at a local restaurant for dinner. While you're at it, you can take a look at her dress, which she shouldn't have bought without you knowing what it looks like, and hopefully like it. She might not be doing these things on purpose, she just might be one of those people who get caught up in the moment and then can't carry through with there obligations. It doesn't sound like she's being mean, just un organized.  

Answer 5

That sux.I think shes jealous.Are you sure shes your friend.