My mom & I keep butting heads about my parenting.

Question

My son is 18 months old, I don't think it's time to start potty training him just yet. But my mom however has taken it upon herself to begin the training when he goes to her house. This is my 1st son and I would like to experience these things for myself with my son when we're ready to so. But I don't know how to tell my mother without making her feel badly. I do know that she is trying to help but I don't need/want help with that yet. Any suggestions???

Answer 1

Most boys aren't even ready to train until 2- 2 1/2 years old. While it is possible to train a boy earlier, it can also be very difficult and confusing to the child...and can also make it take even longer if tried too early. There is a lot of research out there about this. I would either find the research showing how it is counter-productive and show it to your mom, or take the cop out and say you went to the pediatrician and he/she said that it is far too early and he thinks you should wait....but make sure you are firm and that you have reasons why it is important to wait. Here's one of many: http://www.med.umich.edu/1libr/yourchild...

Answer 2

You're facing one of parenting's most difficult trade offs. If you want to use grandparents for childcare, there will always be some level of conflict. This seems like a fairly small issue, some grandparents behave outrageously when left alone with the kidlets. And you seem as if you're clearly not willing to allow harsh directives from you to have a negative impact on the relationship.

Only you know what you can say to her and what you can't. One of the mildest ways to make the request is to just say "Mom, please do me a favor and don't mention the potty to Justin. We're going to train him at 2 and use a method  that the pediatrician recommends and it's important to leave it alone until then."

You will, of course, have to be able to reply intelligently about the method you're going to use. That's a good thing because you should choose one and stick with it.  

Answer 3

You can either start potty-training him although it is very early.Or just tell your mother that you do not want to do this yet.If she cannot respect your wishes,then baby will not be coming to her house anymore.Bottom line-You are mom & you make the desicions..