My mom expects me to have s*x with my boyfriend....?

Question

My boyfriend is 23 (just turned it a few months ago) and I am about to turn 17 in a few days. We've been together for a while now. We broke up a few weeks ago but are now back together.

I don't work days but my boyfriend does. He has a lunch break everyday at the same time so most days we eat lunch together at his house or mine. We are almost always alone for his lunch hour and everyday we go grab lunch and bring it back to one of our homes and eat it while watching Price is Right. That's all that goes on. My mom keeps joking around and trying to make me admit that we have s*x or do something sexual on his lunch hour.

We've only kissed and that's it! We are waiting for s*x until marriage. When she does it, it makes me feel embarassed because she says it right infront of him as well. Then she'll say things like oh I was your age and I was having s*x at 17. I hate it.

The other night my boyfriend was dropping me off at my house after going to the mall. I was wearing this strange necklace and took it off on the way to the mall. When we pulled into the driveway I didn't want to forget it so I was trying to put it back on and couldn't get the clasp so he put it on for me. My mom was watching through the window and when I came in she asked what that was all about. She basically said I was a liar and that we didn't go to the mall. Since I had my necklace off she said she knew what I was doing. I had to log onto my bank account to show her that I was at the mall through my debit card transactions.

What do I do?

Answer 1

well your mom is just curious, is not that she want you to have s*x, but what she mean is that she want you to tell her when it happens, most of the times when the guy is older it tend to happen, but if you want to wait till marriage the  go for it that good, just tell your mom, good luck

Answer 2

well you can go to like a gynacologists monthly to show her ur not havin s*x cos they can tell if ur or not

but i don't know waht else

Answer 3

maybe she's just really worried that you will have s*x, get pregnant and ruin your life.

Plus, for your boyfriend's sake, you better not have s*x until you are 18 cuz in most states, a 16/17 yr old girl with a 23 yr old guy = statutory rape!

Answer 4

Wow. That's just wierd. I have NEVER heard of a parent encouraging their child to have s*x. Ridiculous. Ignore your mother and wait until marriage. It will be worth it.

Answer 5

    She is just assuming that you would have by now based on statistics that are out there, by the fact that your BF is much older than you, and finds it hard to believe you haven't, or that you're not ready.

   If you can be brutally honest with her, then she can be with you as well.   Maybe she regrets having s*x at 17 and is nervous for you....

   Would she not be the first you would tell??

   My daughter is 14, but we have private talks all the time.

   Your Mom should be proud of you and support you. You go girl!!

Answer 6

I think she wants you to get married.  Now.  

Do it;   If you are old enough and he is ready, then get married and get away from your mom.  I know you love her but she over the top nosy.  

Being married will give you independent status.  Ask your boyfriend if marriage is on the immediate agenda.  

Talk to a minister first.  Be honest with him.  Let him talk with your mom separately.  But tell her you are both willing to marry if you are.

Answer 7

good job girl!!!!  just prove that your mom's wrong maybe she's trying to see if you did because teens this days are having s*x at the very early age.

Answer 8

that is uh...twisted... So ya I totally think you should keep doing what you are doing. It is really great that you are going to wait and your BF must be really devoted to you if he is really willing not to have s*x with you...after all he is 23. But if I were you and it was really really bothering me like so much I was going to flip anytime soon, I would lie to her. tell her one day that she brings it up again that you had s*x with him yesterday or something. Just be prepared that if you do lie you have to keep on lying until it is no longer a lie.... so think about that.

Anyway, good luck!

Nciole  

Answer 9

Sit her down and try to explain how you feel it is right that you wait for marriage before exploring your sexuality. If she still doesn't get it, well just shake off what she says, maybe add in a comment like "oh yeah you know it."  Or something sarcastic.

Not everyone is going to believe you!! As long as you know you are being true to yourself, you will be fine and not regret anything!!!

Answer 10

Sit her down and explain that her accusations are not appreciated and it makes both you and your boyfriend extremely uncomfortable when she says things like that. Tell her very firmly your plans for waiting till marriage and that although she had s*x at 17, you and her are not the same person, so she cannot expect the same things from you.  

Answer 11

just stay true to yourself!

Answer 12

Sit down and talk to her straight up, with your boyfriend. First off, your mom believes because of the age difference all he wants is to take advantage and get s*x (trust me my mom tries that with me and mines [I'm 16 and he's 19]). Just sit down and calmly explain that your relationship surpasses that of s*x. After that if she still jokes, then let it roll off your shoulders because you know what: you and him both know there is nothing more and so does God so who cares what a mere mortal says.

Answer 13

Wow that's weird. She probably thinks that just because she was having s*x at that age, that you are or something.. I really don't know. Just ignore her, if she doesn't believe you, that's her problem not yours. Good luck with that..

Answer 14

The two of you are to be commended for wanting to save s*x for marriage.

And your Mom is a real sad case.

You should take your mom with you to church and hopefully she'll repent and get saved.

Answer 15

That's illegal...

That's rape.

Haha, You watch price is right with your boyfriend... That's funny. Haha.

That's not good, to be telling a 17 year old, that you had s*x then.

Tell your mom... I'm not going to have s*x till marriage.

I don't want to. I am not you. I don't want to have any risks of std's and pregnancy.

Answer 16

Ignore her. What parent would want their child to have s*x at 17? Especially with how many teens are doing it nowadays.

Save it for marriage. You and your boyfriend are doing the right thing, stay that way :)

~Julie

Answer 17

thats just wierd. its like she wants you to mess up and do what she did. wait. its what im gonna do.  

Answer 18

Honestly, My mom's the exact same.

I'm 17, my boyfriend's 19.

Apparently we have s*x all the time.

She even forced me on birth control!

Just because her and her 2 sisters and brother got pregnant/got someone pregnant between the ages of 16 and 18 doesn't mean I'm going to!

I personally just deal with it and let her think what she wants because its clear I can't do otherwise.

I hope your mom gets over it soon.

♥  

Answer 19

I think that your mom is just trying to see if she can catch you in the act, but since you and your boyfriend aren't doing anything to catch (which i support!) you should continue to try and prove her wrong. Maybe she's using reverse psychology. Just keep practicing abstinence. Good job :)

Answer 20

Dude that's weird. I'm not quite sure what to tell you. You should probably have a talk with both of them and you and your boyfriend should explain that you're waiting till marriage. Good luck.

Answer 21

tell her how she makes u feel wen she says things like that too you and tell her that ur waiting til ur married and the IF u lose it b4 hand that she will be the first to know

Answer 22

Wow! Your Mom sounds like she's trying to make jokes and comments to make you admit you are sexually active, not a great mode of communication. I feel sorry that she does not believe you, and also very happy that you seem to be a responsible Teen which is hard to come by these days. I have a 15 yr old and while she is just now allowed to group date only, we talk all the time about what is appropriate orr not and the importance of waiting.  If I were you I would just come out and tell her how you feel about her making the comments, try explaining to her again that you are not active. Maybe she made some poor choices when she was young, but you are not her. If she doesn't believe you there isn't much you can do expect to be truthful with her in all areas of your relationship. In the end you know what you are and are not doing. Good luck. on a personal note though, I think 23 is a little old for you, age differances at this age do make a difference (at 15 I had 21yr old boyfriend, didn't work out to well in the end)

Answer 23

Not your boyfriend, certainly.

Answer 24

Your mom needs to learn how to trust you, tell her that you guys are waiting till marriage, that that is your belief, and that is when you are going to lose your virginity. And if she still doesn't trust you then, then oh well, because you know you are doing nothing wrong.