My mom invades my privacy to the extreme!?

Question

She tries to read my IMs, she ease drops on my phone conversations, when my doors closed she just opens it and barges in like nothing. I could have the bathroom door shut and be getting out of the shower and she will just come in and start having a normal conversation with me like what do you want for dinner? Same goes with when I have my bedroom door closed and I'm getting changed or dressed for bed...she'll come in sit on my bed and be like so how was your day at school? or something like that, and I'm not allowed to lock the door, I don't know why, but I do know when I do her and my dad flip on me. I have even caught her reading my diary. Then she tried to ask my questions about it. Like so tell me what happened between you and your boyfriend? Or something like that. She goes through my cell phone, looks at all the numbers then asks me who everyone is. It really pisses me off and I'm tired of it.

By the way, I'm 15 years old.

Answer 1

my mom used to be like that to..she doesnt want to let go of you she wants to be a part of your life still...i dont have a good relationship with my mom b/c when she would do that i would yell and scream and she got the message to leave me alone...my sister on the other hand is very close with her b/c she let her in and talked to her...tell your mom that when your ready to talk you'll come to her and that you promise to tell her stuffand b a part of her life but she needs to stop interupting you you need your own space

Answer 2

Well.. ive definately been in that situtation, not to that extreme but.. the only advice i can give is well try talking to her for one. Shes prolly just worried about you..(she may see or read too many things in the news) But youre at the age where u NEED the privacy. Things will get better in time.. but whatever you do dont snap at her.. it makes things much much worse.. And as for the cell phone.. well if shes paying for it then.. well she kinda has a right to know what your doing with it. Maybe try to find a parttime job.. try to show her how "responsible" you are and she may start to back off..  

Answer 3

My parents do that to. They have the password to my email, and when my phone rings, I have to tell them who's calling me.

Answer 4

I have been there, it sucks!  Try talking to her more, in times that you find appropriate, she will feel more satisfied that she knows what is going on, and will spend less effort snooping through your stuff, and won't barge in on you to chat so much.  Plus if you bring up the conversation, you will feel more in control of the direction it goes.

Answer 5

talk to her about it

say

"mom i feel your not respecting my privacy enough"

and then talk to her about it

Answer 6

wow that sucks. just tell her to leave you the h**l alone. and you should be allowed to AT LEAST lock the bathroom door when you're in there and the bedroom door when you're changing. they actually cant make you leave it unlocked if she keeps barging in like that. you have the right to you own privacy and they cant tell you otherwise. just tell her you're really pissed off with her and to stop it. yell at her if you need to. it makes you feel better and she might actually listen. good luck

EDIT: and she cant tell you if you can or cannot have a boyfriend. it doesn't matter if she's your mom and its her house, its YOUR privacy, YOUR life. she has to knock before opening a door and she cant butt in on your life if you dont want her to. and parents cant tell you who you can and cannot date. its totally unfair no matter how old you are. if my mom did that to me, id still date whoever i wanted to and she would just have to deal with it. all these people answering saying that she doesn't have to knock and that she can tell you who you can and cannot date are just stupid.

Answer 7

... and send her this post via e-mail...

Answer 8

At least lock the door, especially when you're taking a shower. If she says anything, just ask her what's so bad about it? What kind of trouble could you possibly get into inside a locked bathroom while you're showering? At the very least, it'll prevent psychos from coming in and murdering you =P  

Answer 9

tell her how it is that youre growing up and stuff...she just tryin to be "cool" wit you and feel like mom and daughter times u know like in tv and movies c**p....shell get over it

Answer 10

I suggest you TALK to her first, there's nothing worse than a whiny teenager. If you talk to her in a calm manner it will sort of showcase your maturity, and give her a chance to rationalize with the way you feel. Tell her that you don't appreciate her behavior. Let her know that it's a bit embarrassing to not be able to get dressed with out her barging in. Tell her that as you get older and mature there is a certain level of respect that everyone deserves and that you feel like the prisoner of a peeping tom in your own home.

If reasoning with the crazy woman fails I propose you act just as unreasonable as her. Put a lock on your phone,change the names on your phone to really crazy nicknames so she wont know who it is in case the lock doesn't work. Start writing about how annoying she is in your diary and tell her you know she reads it so you'll keep your really private business to yourself from now on. Lock the door whenever you take a shower, and tell her that you wouldn't have to lock the door of she didn't barge in. Tell her your willing to compromise, if she'll stop trying to see you in your birthday suit you'll stop locking the door. OR refuse to bathe until she promises to hold off on conversations until you are fully dressed. No matter what STAND YOUR GROUND!!!

I really hope it all works out!

Answer 11

She wants to know what you are doing because protecting you is her job until you turn 18. If 15 year olds knew it all (which adults don't either) the age of majority would be 15.If you're doing nothing wrong, there;s nothing to hide.

She wiped your butt. She doesn't see your nudity as a big deal. Tell her that you do. A knock would be nice, but it is her house and you live on her dime. If she wants to come in and actually pay attention to you and your life, thank God.

At 15, she doesn't have to let you have a phone or a bf. Push her and she will push back. Tell her you prefer to be dressed when she comes in, but otherwise, she is not out of line.

Think of it in a less self-centered way and maybe it will make sense.