My mom is not excepting the fact that I'm growing up?

Question

Okay, so here's the deal. I'm 12 and my mom won't let me shave my legs. My legs are really hairy and they really need to be shaved. I get made fun of all the time and I'm called hairy wildebeest. My mom didn't shave her legs until 8th grade and tells me I will get hairy legs if I shave. I shave my armpits, so I used my razor and shaved my legs one day. My mom found out and she asked me why I did so, but I lied and said that I didn't do it. I don't know what to do and I feel really bad.

Also, she bought me these really flimsy sports bras. I wear them, but I really need a padded bra because my nipples shows right through them. I drop hints to buy one, but she so doesn't get it(partially because she started puberty late).

Oh, yeah. One more thing: She doesn't tell me a lot about growing up, sexual things, and when I'm sad she tells me to stop and ignores me and sometimes puts me in time-outs.

It really bugs me. Please help. Thanks.

Answer 1

Talk to your mom. If you get nowhere, write her a letter. If that doesn't work, save your money, go shopping with a friend or relative, and get a decent bra and some NADS for your legs. I have the same problem and NADS was the only thing that worked to get rid of the hair for good. Shaving sucks.

Answer 2

If you want your mother to accept that fact you're growing up you have to SHOW her that you are, and that involves you having an open discussion with her about these things. Of course it won't be easy, but you have to bring them up to her so she can't ignore any hints you're dropping. Explain to her that you're getting made fun of in school because of your hairy legs (sorry, but telling her you didn't shave them was a childish lie - if your legs are as hairy as you say they are it would be obvious to anyone if you shaved them. It's not like the hair just fell out) and that it's hard enough being a kid without getting made  fun of for something you could easily change. You are NOT your mother, so her saying she didn't shave until 8th grade is a moot point. You must also tell her you need a better bra and that you need to have a discussion about s*x. You must act like a grown up to be treated like a grown up. It probably won't happen overnight, but if you keep acting grown up her responses WILL eventually change. Good luck.  

Answer 3

Can you get your Dad or an Aunt or Cousin or someone close to listen to you then speak with your Mom.  Often mothers can't face that their child is growing up.  If another adult speaks to her it might help her see the light.  Good luck.

Answer 4

Ask your mom if you can sit down and talk with her,

and ask her nicely to not say anything until your done.

Tell her you get made fun of, and that shaving will improve your confidence.

Also tell her that sports bras are not enough, and that you need one with padding.

Don't ask for Victorias Secret or anything, :P

maybe just one by xhiliration, from target or walmart.

Answer 5

you really need to just tell your mom how you feel.  I know you probably have asked about some stuff, and it might be embarrassing or uncomfortable, but just go all out and tell her everything in your description here.  It's the only way. If she still doesn't listen, talk to your doctor or Simone like a school scicatrist that will talk to you mom and knock some sense to her.  

Answer 6

i think you need to sit her down and tell her how you feel, it sounds as if she's scared of losing control. Explain that just because you're growing up doesn't mean that you will stop loving her or get into trouble. You just want to grow up "normally", hopefully she will realise that this is the best way and will want to make you happy.

good luck hope this helps x

Answer 7

I am sorry. Tell her that most of the girls at school are shaving their legs (and armpits too) and it is very embarrassing for you to walk around with hairy legs (especially during summer) people might think that you do not take care of yourself. Your mom should help you to find the best shaving stuff so your skin would not be irritated. Your leg hair won't get any stronger even if you shave.

Answer 8

First of all, it's "accepting." :)

Second of all, she puts you in time outs?? For God's sake, you're twelve!

Okay, try to talk to her about this and how you feel and how you think she's treating you like a child and not a developing woman. If you really have to, resort to the internet to find out stuff about puberty. Obviously, I'm NOT telling you to look for p**n or anything, but find a SAFE site (yahoo answers may work) to ask your questions and get answers. It's important for you to know how your body is developing and what you should do about it!

Answer 9

She puts you in 'time-outs'?  Jesus Christ, you're way too old for that.  

Let me make this clear to you.  You're twelve, so you're old enough to be blunt.  Quit beating-around-the-bush and tell her want you need as a young adult.  You need a new bra (that's a f*cking given, you're going through puberty).  I can understand that she doesn't want you to shave your legs (shaving is a pain in the *ss), but you can make your own decisions.  Seriously, stand up to her.

Answer 10

Well, for one thing, if you're wanting her to "accept the fact you're growing up" don't lie to her. That will make her lose the ability to trust you at all later on...

If you really want her to talk to you about those things, just ask her.

Answer 11

geez ur moms strict! just tell her you really dont like ur legs, and if she doensnt listen, then shave and do  it urself. im 13 and have been shaving since i was like 9. she'll get mad, but maybe if u show her how u handle it, she wont care. Or go with a friend and buy everything, and hide it?

btw my name is jenny also.

Answer 12

She's your mom and the fact is she's just doing it out of love. I'm 13 and I had the same issue when I was 12. My mom didn't do anything until she was like 14 so she thought it was ridiculous when I wanted to shave my legs, wax my eyebrow, and do stuff w/ my friend by myself, and still to this day she doesn't let me do stuff. I finally convinced my mom to let me shave my legs when I told her all of my other friends did it and I showed her my legs. Do you have an older sister? Because if you do she's been through the same things and she understands, she could help u talk to your mom that's what my sis did. Oh and if you are the youngest person in your family your mom could be babying you because you are her last child and she doesn't want you to grow up so fast. And if you are the oldest in your family it could be because your mom has never had to deal w/ someone going through puberty before, you could ask your mom to get u books like "what's up w/ my body?" that have answers to common questions girls have about growing up. Try sitting your mom down and talk to her explain how you think she is babying you (say it nicely) explain how things are different from when she was your age. And just remember your mom is only human, she has flaws too and she could be confused by all this too, she probably doesn't know what to tell you sometimes.