My mother had a dream about a house?

Question

The first dream she was in front of a house. Presumably hers, she lives in an apartment now, but a house nonetheless. My fiancee was in front of the house and said the red roses belong in the back of the house. When she protested, he told her "Life is a job".

Second dream had my in-laws, my fiancee and myself in the dream. My fiancees brothers were climbing in through the windows. His sister was packing up dishes out of a china cabinet and kitchen. Then his two brothers were carrying out dressers. My mother was telling them nicely they didn't need to take everything, that its our house. My fiancee was helping move things out and my mother was standing over a glass case that had all kinds of pastries and sweet concoctions in it, but it was closed off in this case. Then my fiancees father (who passed away several years ago) walked up to my mother and put his hand on her shoulder. He whispered in her ear to tell my husband that what he thought he (his father) felt about him is wrong... that he had love for him. He had a tray of sweets and handed them to my mother and told her to give them to his wife. When my mother turned to call my fiancee to let him know his father was here, she didn't see him anymore.

The Situation: My fiancee doesn't have the best relationship with his brothers/sister. He was the eldest child and treated the worst growing up by his father. His mother was into the church (J.W.) and his father was NOT. His dad passed away a couple of years ago and left money to his sister (apparently none went to the boys). The sister then stopped paying the rent at their apartment and moved her mother in with her. Then she put their mother into a nursing home and bought homes, cars and other luxuries with the "Will" money. One of the brother's is getting an attorney to see if the sister somehow finagled the family and is now abusing the money. The mother is in a hospice/nursing home and they are required to have food brought in from the outside... since the sister has the money she was supposed to be providing the food and she hasn't been... so the mother is just above starving. No one knows if she is executor of the estate but I'm sure the attorney will find out.

Please advise on this dream and/or the situation if you have legal experience.

Answer 1

that is a cool dream to me. That would be a good show like where someone is asleep and they do that stupid blur or make a cloud. and show it. Any wayz i am sorry i dont have legal experience.  

Answer 2

Your mother's first and second dreams are as if two chapters from the same book - very closely related.    

In the first, your mother reveals an insight into your fiance's own emotional and family issues and holds reservations about what that may mean in your marriage.  She must be a perceptive and wise lady - but you must be guarded as to how the information is applied to avoid damage in the relationships between you, your fiance and your mother.

It may be that your fiance is a bit reticent about any expressions of desires for the better things in life for you at this time.  Surely enough, the second dream reveals why that could be - he is strapped and emotionally must be nearly tapped out.

His remark in the dream is quite right - life is a job.  Marriage all the more so; nice things like rose gardens don't just appear.  But your mother is right as well - life is not all work - work is for survival first, but one hopes her children do well and find beauty and comfort in life.  She seems to see the possibility of realizing a sweeter side of life for the two of you - but again, the second dream reveals why she may have concerns of whether he will find that opportunity and be a strong partner for you in this pursuit.

The second dream does illuminate the situation quite well.  Your fiance has shouldered a great burden in life already - and is not finding real relief yet.  Being the eldest would have placed much responsibility on his shoulders - and for now it seems his father left him with few resources to cover needs.  

Was that the father's intent?  Was there trouble between them in life?  That is still murky - but your mother at least senses that something else is afoot - that his father would not have done so.  It may take a good attorney to sort that out indeed - his sister has at least ignored her family by using her 'windfall' as she has and may be plainly seen to have been unfair and unloving.  She has perhaps gone further by taking illegitimate advantage at terrible cost to the others.  If it is not even known what power she ever had to seize these assets then your fiance is well behind in getting truth uncovered and on the table - a good attorney is needed - now.

Regardless of his father's intent, your fiance has lived through the whole thing and had to cope with an awful burden. That can embitter one, even a good person - he could easily see his father as the villain when that may not have been the case at all.  This remains to be found out in the legal and firm business sense, and beyond that in terms of his own personal relationship with his father and his continuing feelings about it.

Your fiance may not have the a relationship with his siblings seen in your mother's dream, but that likely stems from what she sees as his sense of duty to them.  She may sense that he would give all - in fact to the detriment of your marriage - in trying to give relief to their plight.  That can be a real danger - again, even in a good person who would care about you.  

This is something you cannot afford to ignore - there is already much heavy baggage piled onto your marriage cart.  It is hard to look at these things in a business way - love is in the middle - but you must be aware of the risks you face and the price that may come - financially and emotionally.  His family's plight can tear his attention from your marriage if not managed carefully.

Your mother seems to sense this risk and the need for his controlling it - even as she understands the reasons for his worries.  But she has you in heart too - blood is thicker than water and she sees trouble as things now stand.  After all, he's made a huge commitment to you - and the question is not whether he intends to keep it, but whether he can under this burden he is carrying.  

The bitterness comes to mind again - your mother's colofrul observation of the house and his negative response affirms that some negativity is creeping into the relationship.  You may wish to peacefully accomodate - but at what cost?

And it is not 'just the money and stuff' - but his emotional state: does he express bad feelings toward his deceased father in any way?  Does he blame him for all that has fallen on him, or did they truly have a sour relationship in life?  Has it left your fiance deeply bitter?  That can be very hard to deal with in life.  Right now you may be a sweet diversion, but if his internal bitterness is not dealt with, over time it will bleed into your own relationship.

In her second dream, your mother does receive a 'message' that he needs to rethink how he feels about his father - and the father may be wrongly accused in this.  She finds herself the keeper of sweetness - truth.  In the dream your fiance's father 'finds' her to be a sympathetic and open-minded agent in this world with a big heart, so he reaches from beyond the veil to plead his case - he wants his son to understand and have a loving life, not a bitter one.  Someh