My mother in law?

Question

Im 5 1/2 months pregnant and have a mother in law that wants to do everything. She wants to "help" design my nursery, take me shopping, give me all sorts of advise with the baby and other things, ect, and she is driving me crazy. How do I tell her back off while not hurting her feelings? She is really sensitive.

Answer 1

Sit down and talk to her.  Tell her that you need time to think about the nursery before you decide and that you want to get your husband's input.  Let her know that things are going a little fast and you want to slow it down because you are more tired and moody than you normally are.  Thank her for everything she has done and tell her you will let her know what she can do to help when you figure it out.

Answer 2

I had the same problem with my last child. Mother in law has a daughter that had a baby at a very young age and mom took care of everything so naturally she thought I would need that too. Any way I talked to my fiance about how his mom was driving me nuts and thought he could put it in a way that would not upset her. Talk to him and explain that it is YOUR baby not hers and you want to enjoy the pregnancy with him not his mother. Try to include her in some things but not all and if she pushes advice on you just nod your head and smile, then when she is gone do what you want if you don't like what she suggested.

Answer 3

Is this ur 1st baby?? Even if its not just say ur grateful she wants to help but ud much rather prepare things urself with ur hubby as its a special time. Stop her now...trust me things get worse when u dont say anything.

Answer 4

I had one of those too and I let it get on top of me to the point were it was causing arguements between my fiance and I and I ended up blowing up at her...it was awful - do not let it get to that point!! Tell her politely that you and your partner want to design the nursery together and maybe let her go shopping once with you for a few things.  Its hard, I know but its better to sort this out before your hormones go nuts later in the pregnancy and you end up saying something you really regret.

Answer 5

My mother in law can be this way as well.  What I found works best is finding something for her to do.  I ask her to do a task - something that needs doing, but I don't have strong opinions about one way or another.  She feels needed, I get something done AND don't have her hounding me - it's a win-win for us.