My mother is a tyrant and doesn't want me seeing my boyfriend...?

Question

Anytime that I find something that I love, my mother will hang it over my head to try to extort anything she wants from me (or just to watch me squirm). This time, it's my boyfriend... He's the most loving, wonderful, and helpful person in my life, and has been for the last year and three months. I'm sixteen and he's just turned 19, and she's, after hundreds of idle threats, now decided to start taking action against him. She won't let me see him while at her house (my parents are divorced ^_^), and says that if he comes within her line of sight she'll call the police. She wants to charge him for statutory rape, but the legal age of consent in MN is 16, so I don't think she can... If he comes over, it's trespassing, if I meet him outside of the property it's "running away." Heh... I don't know what to do. My father thinks it's bull****, but he won't do anything, and my stepfather, in his drunken slurs, just acquiesces with whatever my mother says to stay on her good side... WHAT CAN I DO ABOUT THIS?

Answer 1

I think you should just let the boy go, before it gets worser.Plus your mom maybe right, because he might rape you.

Answer 2

Well you have a serious problem have you thought of sitting your mom down and talking with her or has she already explained her position with you???  ....Sweety i know this seems like the end of the world but it's not you should be back in school where there lies your relief from your home life take up an activity in school your boyfriend will have too understand your at a very young age where if you let him go if he come back hey but for now YOU HAVE NO WIN against your mom your under her care and for whatever reason she may see something you don't as parents we have to look out for our children it's our responsibility too make sure your properly care for so yeah it mite seem like she's the worst but it could be worst in the long run so again your best bet is too try the new activity in school too get your mind off of him so this way you won't think of him so much and always remember the more you talk about a subject the more power you give it so let this go ........rem...YOU HAVE NO WIN OVER MOM....So sorry to say but it's the truth Don't do anything you'll regret later ....and FYI for your dad even if he didn't agree with your mom he should have not shared that with you....give your mom a break she probably is doing the best she know how.....your getting older where sooner than later you'll be able to go out with guy's....good luck

Answer 3

Your parents have created quite a mess.  Now you have been making it worse by having an affair with a guy much older than you, and your parents aren't being mature about it either.

At 16 you should be concentrating on your studies and not trying to copy your parent's mistakes.

Answer 4

Instead of being enemies why not try calling a Truce. It is your parent's job to protect you, raise you properly and establish limits, rules and penalties. As a parent I would be very concerned if my 16 yr old daughter was dating a 19 yr old boy. Now for some harsh facts, you are still a minor child in the eyes of the Law and as such your Mom has the final word, the quicker you accept this the faster things will improve. I sense a lack of Trust on the part of your mom, and also a bit of an attitude on your part. I suspect you may be angry and resentful over the divorce, and if that is the case you may want to talk to someone about those issues. At home I would start doing things to help out, don't wait to be told, just do something, it can be a little thing but it will make a BIG impression upon your mom and it will begin building her Trust, which will make things much easier for you. At least try what I suggest, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

Answer 5

16 may be the legal age of consent but that doesn't mean you are mature enough to be having s*x. There is a lot of responsibility and risk involved and frankly, you aren't mature enough at 16 to handle all the possible ramifications. You're lucky your mom is only threatening to prosecute him if he comes near you. If a guy had dared touch my daughter when she was 16, I would have prosecuted. His cute little butt would be in jail where it couldn't get near her.

Answer 6

Remind mom that the legal age of consent is 16 and ask her what about him specifically upsets her. You have to go on the assumption that she has your best interests at heart. She's probably worried that you'll get pregnant. Or maybe she sees something that you don't see - you need to sit down and have a real talk with her.  

Answer 7

if you are 16 and that is the legal age for consent in your state, then she cant charge him for rape. only you can do that yourself, which obviously you wont.

dont worry hon. 2 more years, and you can just move into your fathers house full time. until then, go over your dads and stay with him and see your bf there. Avoid the subject with your mom and just dont even respond to her when she goes off at you.

I really hate women like her by the way. IM fuming as i read this because i know you are in h**l at the moment.  

When you are a bit older and about to move out - sit your mother down and be very frank with her : im leaving because you made my life a livng h**l. You are a b*tch and now am not going to speak to you until you ring me and appologise.

good luck.