My mother keeps telling me ' Nobody is gonna love you '?

Question

I have a certain type of men that I'm attracted to...and my mother keeps telling me to forget it and to lower my standards and date guys that are not even my type. What's the purpose of love then ?

She keeps telling me that they type of men I want are never going to love me. And I'll never get what I want... ...

She says I am where I am in life because I don't listen to her.

Are parents always right ?

Answer 1

h**l, no they are not always right. They are just as human as the non parents in the world, and yes, they make mistakes too.

You  know what you want and what you deserve, dont let anyone tell you that your not worthy of a great love with any kind of man you wish to be with.

Answer 2

No one is always right and parents aren't an exception. However, I'm sure your mom has your best interests at heart. It does seem a bit negative. Please tell me that you aren't after the rich man. You face lots of competition if it is and these men aren't all that. Obviously this is a gross generalization but it may take some time. It's better to look deeper. You need to discover it for yourself. Maybe you can prove her wrong. It's possible. But keep in mind that odds might be low.

Answer 3

parents are not always right.. but if you feed into it then it would look that way...I'm not sure what type of men you like but thats not for your mother to decide

Answer 4

wow, most parents are supportive and want their kids to be better off than they are. your mom seems to want to not allow you to reach your goals. Parents are not always right. But you should not ignore what they say.

Answer 5

No they're not always right.  Often but not always.

She may have a lot of basis for her comments though, but not in the way you're thinking.  Lowering your standards means maybe a guy who is less attractive then you'd like but more loving and grateful that he is devoted to you.  It might mean someone who makes a comfortable salary as opposed to one with tons of money, but I tell you the money obsessed one is obsessed with one thing and that's not you.

You might not be ready for that though.  If you're young, date whoever you want.  When you're ready to settle down you want someone who is also ready, and sometimes that means someone who is less dynamic then you think you want or less driven then you think you want.  You need to think about who you want as a father, not a sperm donor, when searching for a mate - and those guys are the sweetest, gentlest real men ever.

As for your mom's comments, doesn't she have any faith in you?  Sheesh!  She's wrong to say that you're where you are in life because you don't listen to her.  Sometimes you need a few mistakes to learn your true path.

Answer 6

Parents are definetly not always right, Im confused why she would think you would never be loved by the men you are attracted to. I think you should stick with what you want and NEVER lower your standards, believe in yourself.

Answer 7

Of course parents aren't always right! I  think it's awful that a mother would say such a thing...ignore her! My advice to you would be to keep an open mind and heart when it comes to dating, instead of focusing on a "type." Because when you focus solely on one kind of person, you may be overlooking the one that's right for you. Instead of focusing on superficial things like looks and money, focus on the person themselves and what kind of person they are. Love has a funny way of making someone more attractive. I was not attracted to my husband at all, but as I got to know him, he became more and more attractive to me because he has such a sweet heart. I honestly started seeing him differently! And now, nearly 20 years later, he's the only one I could imagine being with and he's my hottie! :)  My point is, that he definitely wasn't my "type," initially, but because I was open, he became my  "type." If I hadn't been, I would have missed out on someone truly loving and wonderful! Good luck to you!

Answer 8

What is this type of man??

Answer 9

Don't lower your standards just to find someone.   Parents aren't always right, and in this instance, it sounds like your mom is off the mark.

Answer 10

She's wrong and DON'T listen to her she will only bring you down.  Always set high standards for yourself if that is what you are willing to work for and feel you deserve.

more details would help, are youtrying to date your teacher or something, is that why she says that?  Give us the scenario, your age, etc.

Answer 11

don't listen to her; she probably just doesn't want you to get hurt when sometimes you don't always get mr.right. you shouldn't settle for anyone else when it comes to love. follow your heart and find the person that is right for you.

Answer 12

Parents are not always right.

What are your standards? Do you go for guys who are really hot, but treat you like c**p? Do you go for guys who are shallow, womanising jerks?

When I was in my early 20's my mom would try to but in and give me her 2 cents on who I was dating. When I was going through it I was really angry, and my response was basically F off, you don't know me, or the guy. Looking back I think she saw a pattern of the type of guy I was dating, and was concerned for me. The guys I were dating were losers, didn't treat me all that well and I was basically just settling for whoever would have me. It was because I had really low self esteem.

This might not apply to you. Maybe you have had great men in your life and your mom doesn't see that. Only you really know. If you find yourself saying "he's really great but......" or "if only he'd......." then you really need to evalute the type of guy you are seeing. There are nice good looking guys out there, and there's so awesome average looking guys out there too. If you meet someone who you think may not be your type based on looks, give him a shot. I did. Now I've been married to him for 3 years, we have a 2 year old son and another on the way.

Answer 13

They are not always right but I agree with the other person there is more to the story.

Answer 14

I've never known a mother to tell her daughter to lower her standards.  

Because you stated your purpose is Love, are you attracted to;  a man who is responsible, capable, accountable, patient, kind, respectful, someone who loves, enjoys you and desires a committed relationship?  This should please your mother.

Because you stated you are attracted to a cetain type of man are you seeking; a man who can offer you money who is materialistic and your desire is to become his trophy Diva?  A Cinderella story.  This might upset your mother.

I'm not stating that a man who's wealthy has less qualities and standards than a working class man.  I am stating that when a woman makes his money her motivation, that's greed and she is cheating both herself and her man of integrity and sincere Love. You should be capable of loving a man for better and for worse.

I won't assume I know the indifferences between you and your mother.  But in my opinion parents are "not" always right. You yourself should know the difference between right and wrong, good and evil, to decide for yourself your own destiny.  There were many things about me that my mother could not know, what was in my heart and soul, my capabilities and determination.  I never appreciated someone assuming they had the right to speak for me or a right to have an opinion of my life when they have not walked in my shoes.   I loved and respected my mother always but "My mother was not me and I am not my mother".

Your destiny is unfolding and only you can guide the sail and direct yourself in the wind.

Good Luck To You

Answer 15

There's too much more to the story that you have chosen not to share with us for anyone to be able to answer your question.