My new boss is harassing and threatening me

Question

I work for a medium size company NYC. My boss was recently fired and they hired a new manager(who was actually a temp and they hired him-I think he was a trojan horse all along to replace my boss). He is rude, threatening, cruel and menacing. Since he was hired all of my colleagues have gone to HR but he hasnt changed. For example he has told me my work sucks(literally said that), he doesnt want me working for him and he will do anything to get me fired, he wants my personal cell phone number so he can call me even if I am in the mens room and I now have to send him an e-mail when I arrive and leave work. This is ridiculous. I am a middle level manager. The final draw was this week he said to me that "He knows what type of man I am and he doesnt need to describe what that is and i can go to HR if I want and they arent going to do anything about it". I am the only Asian in my company and I feel like he was referring to my race. I wen to HR again and the three ofus are supposed to have a discussion tommorow. I thought about this over the weekend and I filed a complaint with the EEOC as I feel his last comment was race related and his failure to prove my work is poor means to me he has no other reason to get rid of me other than my race. Should I tell them I filed an EEOC complaint? How should i handle this situation tommorow?

Answer 1

just explain everything you have been feeling and tell them everything your boss has done, and then if they ask if youve done anything about it tell them about the report!!!

-----good luck!!!!!!!!!!-------

Answer 2

It could be - that he was hired to kick tail and take names. Or he may be trying to run off the old staff so he can replace you with people he trusts. Both things happen in the corporate world.

As far as the comment -- I took that to mean he was judging your character - not your race.

If the EEOC thinks it's worth pursuing -- they are going to talk to him.

He said your work sucks. Have you gone to him in a nice manner - an "I want to learn from you manner" an "I'm a team player manner"  a "I know you are the boss and I am not a threat to you manner" and tried to have a discussion with him about how you can improve and be the type of employee he wants?  

It looks like he is here to stay. So you have a choice - find another job. Or do what ever it takes to make nice, get off his sh*t list and onto his good side. If he feeds you a spoonful for cr@p - you smile - call it chocolate and ask for another helping. If you have to start sucking up-- sucking his toes... then do it.

Are there other people on the staff that he is not as bad too? If so, watch them, talk to them -- what is it they are doing that is keeping them out of the line of fire and you in it?

Every time you go to HR, every time you file a complaint, every time you bow up to him -- you only bring the hammer down harder.   Eventually it gets to a point - where there is nothing you can do to get the pressure off. He will either run you out or build up a business case to fire you.  

I've worked for some pretty bad managers. It's been my experience - you either get out or learn to get along and do what ever you have to do do to make your life easier.  

It's really rotten to work for people like him.  Either way, it may be a good idea to dust off the ol' resume and start putting feelers out.

Answer 3

Perhaps your work DOES suck.  

Often times a company WILL bring in a "Simon Cowell" type.  Simon can be rude - but he's always right.

Answer 4

Maybe you could ask a higher rank in the company about him or maybe you just have the bad side of him. Try making friends with him. Good luck

Answer 5

I think you should drop-kick him in the throat.

Answer 6

sue his ***!!!

nah im jokin idk it is more of a personal decision

Answer 7

Just because you don't get your way, does not give you the right to play the race card.  I hope you get fired.

Answer 8

quit

Answer 9

i tell u what record  his *** from your cell phone. u need proof

Answer 10

Harrassment, get that dude fired, don't back down either, just make sure you don't do anything that will give him a reason to fire you.

Get your work mates involved as evidence that he is not a fair boss

Good luck

Answer 11

I don't know how much I would trust those places that let you put complaints in with them, because they rarely do anything. You need a lawyer and you need one FAST

Answer 12

If this guy really is just plain mean with no reasoning behind it, I wouldn't listen to anyone who tells you to take it like a man. Just because they put up with whatever c**p life throws at them doesn't mean you have to. I would sit this guy down and tell him everything you feel. If he doesn't listen, I'd go find a job somewhere else. On the spot. I used to work for a guy who used steroids, until I reached the age of reason and I got sick of people telling me that I had to put up with it. Don't be done in by BS at work.

Answer 13

no

Answer 14

you cant tae it like that. you must tell someone about it, most likeley someone who can do something about it. dont tell him about the complaint. he will find out. quit tommorow. if you really cant quit because of the money, then ask to speak to him privatley, then be nice and calm about it. tell him exactly how you feel but dont be rude about it. that will only get you fired. if he does fire you, then take it to court. this isent right and you cant be treated like this. you sound like a good person and no good person deserves to be treated like that. i hope it all works out for you!

Answer 15

Thats tough, but the best way might be to tell him about the complaint but do so with co-workers by your side.

Answer 16

This is harassment, which is illegal. tell the police and get his a$$ arrested.  

Answer 17

If you really feel this is new boss is seriously relating to your race, then you should tell them that you filed a complaint about him. In fact, if he's as bad as you said he is, you should talk to the company director tell him about what this man has been doing to you.

Answer 18

Go to HR immediately.  If they don't help you, then go to the Labor Board in your city.

Unbelievable in this day and age.

Tell the truth.

Answer 19

i think you've done your part, don't tell him anything, you want to catch him with a surprise so he doesn't have time to come up with any excuses for his behavior

your doing the right thing, continue on the same path

Answer 20

Aw! I'm really sorry. I don't have a job, but I can imagine how degrading that will be. And just to let you know, no one should have problems with Asians, or any other race for that matter. I think Asians are adorable. [no lie]. And if you haven't told him how you feel about his confrontations, maybe you should politely and respectfully ask him to stop, or in some other way try to work out your problems. And as for the meeting tomorrow, be grudgingly honest. If your boss gets in trouble, or fired, at least you'll have a better working environment.

Good luck with everything. Hope this helps.

Answer 21

If your HR department does not help you, go directly to the EEO in the state. Make sure you have every thing documented, when you file the complaint. If you have any witnesses, get there statements too. Do not tell your boss you filed a complaint either. It will take some time with the EEO, but will be worth it. Just document everything, and if you can record it on tape. Till then try to bare with it, and dont let him know it bothers you, because he will feed on that. Good Luck to you, I know first hand it is tough.

Answer 22

you Better quit and sue him for harrassment

Answer 23

You're going to have an awful time proving that remark had anything to do with race. By saying he knows what kind of man you are, he probably meant he knows you're the kind of man to run to HR (which you have repeatedly done).

I don't see anything in your question about harassment or threats, but the point is he's an obvious a*****e, and you and your colleagues don't feel comfortable working there.  You can either wait him out (believe me, he'll dig his own grave), or find another job.

And you don't have to bother telling him about the EEOC complaint: HR will  find a way of letting him know the minute they receive the letter.

Answer 24

One word. Cops. If being an abusive jerk isn't a crime, I pity you. If the authorities don't work, just go to HR like he said or you can make it fun. You could just punch him in the face and hope HE doesn't call the cops. In that case you'd have to quit, but it'd be a lot better than just taking it forever and a day.

Answer 25

one word "lawyer"

Answer 26

listen you have to stand up to this a....hole and be strong

1. take notes and write down when this happen and file as much complaints as possible

2. If his boss don't do anything take through the chain of command and so forth

3. Start carrying a small recorder  everyday with you put it in you jacket and record his comments he can say he didn't say it then

4. when you get enough proof, as much as possible , sue I hate butholes like him , stay strong and standup for yourself

5. keep your mouth shut about what your doing you never know who is who

good luck!!!!!!!!

Answer 27

Consult with a lawyer and tell them what is going on. Keep documentation of everything (hopefully he's careless enough to send something nasty in an email or memo). I don't know of any law against being "mean" per se, but if he is singling you out due to race and/or making derogatory and racist comments when you are a good, decent worker then by all means - then he is definitely in violation of harassment laws and needs to be stopped. His supervisors need to do something about this guy immediately or they could be on the line as well. Good luck.

Answer 28

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Answer 29

War strategy rule #1: know thy enemy.

This man sounds like a control freak, it is his strength and his weakness. Casually drop a line during the HR meeting stating you have taken "other appropriate actions in this matter", but don't specify what they are. It will get the message across and drive him insane from not knowing what was done. He's found your sensitive button, now go push his :)

Answer 30

Okay, first off - you need to go to him and directly address these issues with him WITH someone else, like HR or his manager, present.

Next, you need to re-exam what he's said to you. While he's been mean, I don't feel what he said to you was racist. I wasn't there but I don't know the tone (words on a page compared to being there are two different things), but I think maybe you've also become sensitive to it.

I think you really need to attack this with others. If others are feeling the same way, why is he still there? Like I said, get his manager and HR to be involved in this. Arrange a meeting for all 3 of you, more if you want to include others who have complained.

Also, be prepared to defend your work. You need to PROVE that you're an asset to the company and he isn't being honest.