My new stepdaughter needs some strict parenting but I don't want to get involved

Answer 1

well.......blending families isn't fun.  it's alot of hard work, compromise, patience, fighting, compromise....  i go through the same thing with my husband.  he has 4  boys.  i have 3 children.  we have been married almost 2 years. we have yet to see eye-to-eye on important issues.  we started counseling several months ago which has helped us tremendously, but we haven't been able to tackle parenting yet.   my husband and i grew up very differently and our parenting is very different.  i faced the same issue......when i tried to help with his kids he just  blew me off.    i try to act like it doesn't matter and focus on the positive, but, that is not true. its very difficult being on different parenting pages.   especially where a difficult child is involved, you have to have some common ground.   this is something you will have to get him to talk with you about.  once he feels like you guys are a team the attitude is different, but until then, its me vs you ...and who is gonna be right...........my husband's problem is that he always wants to win, it doesn't matter how wrong he is.     so.  pick your battles.  what is the most important, start there.  and be honest.   you married him.  do you love him enough to work through this challenge?   your situation will be different with his child in the house.  things get crazy.  the house doesn't feel like its yours.    you need to read about blending families so you will find out you are not crazy, but rather normal in all the feelings associated with blending a family.