My office supplies are always getting into fights. How do I get them to get along better?

Question

My tape dispenser is always criticizing my stapler by telling him that he "looks tacky". They are always verbally and physically fighting. My ruler usually stays quiet through it all, but I can just tell he is bottling up all of his feelings and just might snap one day.

How do I create harmony amongst my supplies?

Answer 1

It sounds like the ruler has a superiority complex by not talking to others.  He feels everyone else may not measure up to his standards.

The tape dispenser is wound a little too tight.

The stapler might have become a bit unhinged.  

I suggest bringing in a mediator, like the coffee maker.  She's observant and her good ideas have been percolating for while.

Answer 2

Your ruler needs a girl/boyfriend.  It'll give s/him an outlet.  Then again, maybe it'd be cruel to subject the new significant other to the ruler's "stuff".  I'd make your tape dispenser an offer s/he'd find hard to refuse. As for the stapler . . . the fashion disasters--the plaid paired with chartreuse & violent pink stripes and those totally granny retro platform shoes--it's a stapler thing, you wouldn't understand.  

I've always been entertained by having a meeting with the primary instigators where they are told that they can't leave until they resolve this.  Then I just let the fur fly.

Answer 3

Wow... Your stationery's are alive? LOL

Answer 4

You made me laugh. I needed a good laugh today. Lol.

Answer 5

Throw them all out and get new ones that aren't alive.

Answer 6

Maybe the ruler stays quiet because of a feeling that he or she can't "measure up" to the other supplies, and the pencil ignores it and thinks the whole thing is pointless lol.

Answer 7

Simple: don't put them near each other. Put them in different drawers or something.