My older sister wanting to babysit my daughter when she's 1 yr +?

Question

My daughter is only 2 months old, but my sister keep reminding me how she want to babysit my daughter once she get a little old enough except I really don't want her to. Of course, I want my daughter to have a bond with her Aunt, but I'm worried about the person my sister is and can be. The most I'm concerned is about her driving. She likes to speed, tailgate other drivers and as well as pick fights with other drivers while looking for parking spots (an awaiting accident and/or road rage to occur). Now, picture your own infant child sitting in his/her car seat in my sister's car doing those actions I listed above. Wouldn't you feel concerned and be worried? My parents and I specifically confronted my sister about this, but she doesn't care therefore I feel that if her niece is in the same car as her I don't think my sister cares rather she was tailgating, speeding, picking fights with another driver or cursing top of her lungs, which all of the above is clearly a huge no no for me.

Answer 1

Can't you just say you don't need a babysitter?  I don't understand why she can't just be happy visiting...why does she  have to be alone with the baby?  I would wonder about that....

My daughter is 5 months old and we have never left her with any other babysitter than her grandmas, who don't drive anywhere with her anyways.  My excuse is always that the carseat base is a pain to move from one car to another if I don't want someone else to drive.  Maybe if you have one you can tell her that?

If she gets offended, that's her problem, you are doing the right thing by being over-cautious.  Good parents put their baby's safety before other people's feelings!

Answer 2

Try taking your sister aside and tell her that you will find someone else to keep your baby,let her know that her behavior scares you and that you want her to see her niece but you don't feel comfortable leaving her with her. Stay strong you are responsible for your little girl and sounds like you are doing the right thing. keep up the good work

Answer 3

i completely understand. Just tell her you don't need a baby sitter

Answer 4

Why are you asking the obvious? You tell her she is not allowed to babysit because of the choices she makes.

Answer 5

Tell her she can babysit, but under no circumstances is she to take your child anywhere in the car with her.

My brother in-law is a terrible driver.  He has totalled at least three cars and been in I don't know how many fender benders.  He is not allowed to drive a car with my son inside, period.

Answer 6

You will have to just say to her that you would like her to babysit when she's older, but only on your terms. No driving anywhere.  So what if it hurts her feelings. It's your boundary, and it's justified.

She'll have to also stop swearing around you, for a few months before hand - so you know she won't do it with your 1 yo there.  Tell people your boundaries. Let them know that if they do THIS, then you will do THIS.  So, don't give her a car seat for her car - or take it out if there is one.  Let her know that she won't be alone with your child unless she goes a couple months in front of you with out swearing. She swears - the clock starts all over again - it will be a couple of months.

Have defined boundaries, express them, follow through with consequences for the actions that were done (against your wishes) that you set as a boundary.  Perhaps a suitable consequence would be no more alone time with your baby if she defies your boundaries.

Answer 7

You do not have to drive anywhere when u babysit. Tell her that her driving skills are to aggressive and she can babysit at home but she is not to drive anywhere. If she cannot agree to this then she cannot babysit. If its not just her driving your concerned with then tell her she can play and be around your child but your going to be there to. She has to respect you.

Answer 8

Maybe she could babysit for an hour or two while you go out and run errands? In your home and no car?

I would never let her take your baby in the car with her though. If theres a situation where you know she'll be at home and stay there with the baby then I might consider it. Thats if you even trust her enough to take care of your baby at home... I'm sure she is capable of it though for an hour or two, especially if you keep checking in on the phone. Good Luck!! But know that she is your baby and that nobody, not even your sister, should be able to make you do something your uncomfortable with. If you're that nervous about leaving her alone with your baby, then don't let her. Period. Some things are too important to apease someone else.

Answer 9

Ummm don't let her drive any where with your kid and you should be fine!